Someone trying to convince me that my baby 'looks a bit funny'

[theothermcoy]

Went out with a group of friends for drinks and one of them spent part of the night trying to convince me that my baby 'looks funny' by pointing out various body parts that 'look odd' and laughing at various pics of him. Friend also started a long rant about how he was much less attractive than his big brother and how she prefers my older DC to the baby.

The person in question has form for making rude comments (especially after a drink or two), however they're currently going through a healthy scare so I'm not sure whether to just let it slide or to take issue with it.

I'm partly annoyed at myself for not standing up for my baby more. I made a few comments about her being out of order but was told that my opinion was clouded by hormones and I wasn't able to be objective.

WIBU to keep supporting my friend but at the same time put a bit of distance between us?

Amazing how many people around who have zero social skills. "Please pass the salt", followed by "thank you", or "hello, how are you?" followed by "I'm well thank you, how are you?".

In the same vein "here's a picture of my newborn" or "here is my newborn" only has one response which is "aahh, gorgeous, looks just like you/your DH/ your other DC". NOT "christ what an odd looking kid, look at those ears, nose whatever reminds me of Dumbo".

She's a cunt.

Cut her loose.

Fuck her and fuck her health scare. She's blown it.

Drop her.
Blank her.

What is the term teenagers use - ghost her.

Delete all numbers, contact etc and never meet up with her again. Pretend she doesn't exist. I would never forgive this.

Get rid. You say she "has form' for making rude comments so really the health scare is by-the-by. She is a rude bitch and I would be, as Cantuse suggests, ghosting her.

leave the bitch

Awful person. Sounds terribly jealous to me! You are blessed to have your children. It is sad she is poorly but you don't talk to people like that. Best to get her out of your life I think

bitchslap her

She sat there and repeatedly said your baby was odd looking and you just took it?

She's no friend. Dump her. Your oldest child will make new friends. The fact your children are friends is absolutely NO reason to remain friends with such a nasty cow. I would do as others have suggested, ghost the bitch and if she asks why, tell her that the reason should be bloody obvious.

She'd have been having a health scare alright if she'd said that to me!

Some babies are odd looking - so are some adults 😁 With tact like that it's surprising she doesn't look like a pug!

some babies are odd i think but wouldnt dream of telling the mother that let alone a friend-id keep my opnion to myself

if shes got form for doing this get rid

Unforgiveable. I'd be texting her something along the lines of -

"I was hurt by your insulting comments about (name) last night. I know you are going through a rough time at the moment and hope that things are soon looking up, but that doesn't excuse you for criticising my baby's appearance.
And no, it is not my hormones making me over-sensitive - I'm sure that you would feel defensive if someone were insulting about your child.
I think it best we leave it to the two DSs to socialise together for now. There is no need for their friendship to suffer, but I'm afraid I can't forget how nasty your comments were towards my beautiful baby."

I love the poster who said she first imagined the friend would be a "childless clot". Niiiice. Now who is being insulting? Good grief.

The term is often child free, btw. Not everyone actually chooses to have children. People do have choices in these enlightened times. Lol

No you don't let it slide. You're his mummy. You have to make a stand for him. He can't make a stand for himself.
Sorry theyve got their health issues, truly I am. However we've all got our problems be them health emotional financial ect, but most of us do not go around insulting little babies.
Thinking what you like is one thing. Saying what you like is very much another

Fuck her and fuck her selfish delusion she can say what she likes. I don't give a shit if she's just found out she needs to have a dildo surgically attached to her forehead she's an utter turd.

First of all fuck off with an opinion you've been specifically asked to keep to yourself (that's all that's required when you have chosen to accept arseholes traits and remain friends), secondly how dare she gas light you with bringing up hormones.

Your son will make other friends, don't risk him having to deal with the same either from her or her son repeating it to yours.

What a dick.

Here is the gem:

trafalgargal

"I was imagining a childless clot but she's a mother she knows you never tell another Mum their child is not gorgeous. She's a bitch or a nasty drunk. I wouldn't let any kid anywhere near her.

You were out with a group. What did the rest of the group make of her horrible behaviour ?"

I'd agree with her "yes he's the funniest looking thing ever I do hope he'll get a job in a circus". That would have shut het up.

Joining the chorus, she's not a friend. Stop making excuses for her and stand up for yourself and your child.

In years to come you might have to support your children during difficult friendships and/or bullying. How are you going to do that, if you as an adult can't be assertive and tell this spiteful bitch that she's bang out of order.

She sounds bitter and jealous. As you say she has an older child I wonder if she is struggling to conceive again so taking it out on your baby to try to make herself feel better. Not excusing her at all, it's really shitty behaviour. It would explain the comments about preferring your older child - I mean who in their right mind would say that to a parent?

I wouldn't feel the same about somebody who said something like that about my child.

My DD was born with her skull already fused in parts. Even though I kept saying to my friends and family that she didn't look right, they all told me she was beautiful, because thats what friends do! She had to have 8 hours of surgery at 18months before she did look normal but they kept telling me so was beautiful.

..... Just awful. Op, she ended your friendship the moment she said those awful things. I could never imagine saying anything so terrible about a child to its mother.

Those are shitty things to say

My cousin's first remark when presented with my newborn DS were 'Ahhh. Shame about the rash though'. He was a crust-ridden little oddball tbf however she spent the next 3 days cooing over him so I didn't have the heart to take offence!

Your 'friend' has no such excuse, she sounds like a right bitch. In vino veritas and all that.

She's really rude.

I did have an odd looking baby, and there were discussions and follow ups with medical professionals about possible causes and consequences and appropriate treatments - but all my family, friends and acquaintances were polite and tactful enough to avoid commenting on it unless I did so first.

I did get one or two "oh, I wondered what was wrong with him" type comments after I'd raised the subject, but not one single person (other than medical professionals, and they were doing their job) started telling me my DC looked odd or pointing out funny looking bits, much less laughing at pictures or comparing him unfavourably with cuter babies.

I would distance myself from her personally. She may be going through a hard time at the minute, but that's no excuse to make rude and hurtful comments about a friend's child's appearance, especially after being told she was being unfair.

She's a total cunt. Bin the bitch.