Neighbour keeps using my washing line.

[Horsegirl1]

We have only one neighbour as we live rural . Our gardens meet and she keeps using my washing line. Everytime I go out to hang up my washing g she has clothes on my line. She has only just started doing this. She has lived next door for 8 months but rarely speaks despite my efforts to be chatty etc (she is very quiet and private and says no more than hello) . Anyways she has suddenly started using my washing line. It's driving me crazy as I have 5 children so have tons of washing. Plus my husband is a farmer so again many clothes to wash . AIBU to politely ask her to buy/put up her own line ??? I wouldn't dream of doing this but maybe I'm an un reasonable bitch and should share ???

or - and as suggested above - put one up for her. She might not feel able to put one up herself.

All these people advising OP to throw the "neighbour's" clothes in the mud, you do realise that the "neighbour" is in fact OP's tenant??

If there is some confusion about access to the washing line, then it is OP's responsibility to explain this to her tenant in an appropriate, civilised fashion.

DraeneiMage

Was it that funny?

It would definitely be better to communicate in a friendly professional way with a tenant. I'm assuming you're receiving regular rent so why not (as others have suggested) fit a line for her?

You need to knock the problem on the head fast. Tell her politely and asap not to use your washing line and that she needs to put one of her own up. "The quiet ones are the worst" .......often said, often true.

Get the letting agent to tell her your garden is off limits! She can ask them for a line!

Bonkers the only thing I can think is that she thinks your place is a holiday cottage too and therefore is pi$$ed you have a line and she does not so just assumes it's the one line for both houses, not realising you are her LL. Hope you come back and tell us what happened?!

Feeling very privileged to live in a rented house with a rotary washing line supplied. I know my landlady lived here about ten years ago though, so I suppose it was hers from then. I've never given it any thought but I suppose I wouldn't have expected one,/!; if there hadn't have been one I'd have installed my own (or mostly likely got DP to do it ) rather than asking her to put one in.

From the way you describe the garden it sounds as if she is probably aware that the line is not for communal use but perhaps she thinks you don't mind if nothing has been said for a few weeks? I'd take her washing down and take it round to her to explain that the drying space is yours and that with 5 children you need constant use of it but that you or DH will supply her with her own line when things have calmed down on the farm (or leave a note to that effect with the washing).

Most of the places we have rented have supplied a washing line, so I thought it was the norm. The one we're in now didn't, however, which I thought was a bit tight of the landlord, but as the rent is cheap I wasn't going to say anything. I bought a rotary one from Wilkinsons for about £20 and just stuck it in the lawn, we'll take it when we go.

I would have expected a washing line in a holiday cottage as well, TBH, unless there was a tumble dryer.

L666TTY's solution - that your tenant thinks your place is a holiday cottage too seems plausible - but how has the tenant not noticed that your 'holiday' has gone on for some time now? Does she know you are her landlords? Otherwise, yes, it is a tremendous cheek for her to trespass in your garden to use the line, and very inconsiderate to leave the gate open when she can see you have small children.

You will have to say something, but put it nicely like 'I don't know if you realise but that it actually our garden, we'd prefer you didn't come in to use our washing line, which we need ourselves'. Depending on how she responds to that you can decide if you want to be nice and install one for her!

I'd be annoyed if a holiday let didn't have a washing line.
As a longer term tenant, I would assume one was provided. I should imagine until recently they were drying their laundry indoors because the weather wasn't reliable enough. Now they are hanging it outside on the only line that's been provided.
Simple solution is to install one in their garden.

Is this the thread to confess that a couple of weeks ago it was a glorious sunny and breezy day, it was forecast rain for the rest of the week, I had a tonne of washing including towels and sheets, and my neighbours were in India...so I 'borrowed' their line?

It wasn't up long as I was super nervous her mum would come round for the mail or something and see it

I wouldn't dream of doing it when they were at home though as she uses it every day.

In the OP's case I'd buy a line from the pound shop and go round and give it to her. Let the tenant sort out putting it up. Ours is one of those retractable ones and we have two hooks on walls that it's stretched between so no concrete required.

It's a bit mean the OP is being bashed for not doing it herself tbh, I wouldn't have a scooby either. I hate DIY

Just have a chat with her - just ask her to stop using it. You have a big family and need to use it on a daily basis. There's no need to be passive aggressive about it and start taking her clothes off it, otherwise she'll think you're providing a service by taking it down for her!

PS. I don't think he/she's being rude. I think they don't realise that the op's line is not for their use too.

I'd think it was a mistake but as she had to go through a gate to get to the line, she must know she's on your property.

I think it's telling that you started by calling her a neighbour rather than a tenant. Tenant- landlord relations are different from neighbour to neighbour relations. Different expectations and different power dynamic too.

As a tenant I wouldn't install a washing line without the landlords express consent. There's no way I'd assume the landlord would be ok with me driving nails into the side of their house or making a hole in the lawn.

If there were already hooks afixed to brickwork or an existing hole in the ground/ patio/ with or without cement, only then would I think it was okay to put up my own washing line.

But then, I also wouldn't be wandering onto the landlords property, leaving gates open when there are small children around (&/or animals)... Surely it's one of the absolute basics of countryside life that you keep gates shut, regardless of what and where the gate is, and what's being farmed, you just don't do it unless you want to be hung, drawn and quartered!

In the face of such rude behaviour I'd be taken aback too OP, and it's a bit mean for posters to assume you are a push over or pathetic in real life.

Surely it makes it worse that she's done it for 4 weeks and you didn't mention it the first time it happened. To be honest that's exactly the kind of situation I'd get into and then cringe over! Now you have to make a definite stand and it feels awful to have to do it. Id be cringing at drawing attention to her rudeness but I do know that's not the right way to think about it... I empathise too much and put myself into the other persons shoes, thinking 'I'd feel so embarrassed if I realised how rude my behaviour was'. But of course, you have to remember that you wouldn't have opened a garden gate to use your landlords washing line without asking first.

So my advice is:

1. empathise less, she's not you, and so won't feel upset / embarrassed in the same way you would
2. get comfortable with unequal power in relationships, so you don't feel terrible about enforcing that power when needed
3. Also don't worry about being inconsistent, you're telling her now, and that's fine, it's not that by leaving it you lose the right to enforce your own boundaries.

I'm interested though, I wonder if she comes from somewhere where communal washing lines are the norm? Not an excuse, just me being curious!

Have you asked her yet OP?

She knows it's not her line, the OP has clearly said neighbour has 'just started doing this' ie she must have seen the OP's washing up there. She is also walking through a closed gate to get to it, and leaving that gate wide open.

If she wants a line, she needs to grow up and ask for one.

If she genuinely is that stupid that she thinks her property extends through a closed gate into a garden someone else very clearly uses, and that it's ok to leave that gate open, all the more reason for OP to get her told asap.

Does she have trees in her garden that you could easily stretch a line between? If so I'd take over a length of line, very cheap and available in most shops. If not, print off the rotary line you can get off amazon for £25 someone suggested and take it around and say something like 'I realise we should have provided some sort of line for you and is this ok?'. You are solving the problem and not just insisting she does something else. She will then go back to using clothes horse until it arrives.

She knows it's not her line. It's clearly in the OP's garden which she has to access through the gate!

Is there no resolution to this yet?

Toast3 is right, would say exactly the same

If she is renting the property from you, it is in your interest to ensure she has a line of her own, if only to give you your line back and ensure she is not drying her clothes inside the home and messing with moisture levels. Shy or not, she is an adult and needs to speak to people.

Tell her to please stop using your line and install one, as her LL, that she can use. Is it really that difficult?

Why are people always so hesitant to stand up to cheeky feckers like this! I would just call round, ask her to remove the clothes and remind her that the line is on private property, YOUR private property. Some people go round walking over other people and get away with it because so many are afraid to stand up for themselves.

I suppose you could make sure that you've got something on the line all the time so there's no room for her stuff. Only take this off when you're ready to replace it with your own proper washing, iyswim.

I would tale it off the line. Hand it back to her. Inform her nicely it's your line and to stop putting her clothes on it. By the same token as she rents a property from you it might be the charitable thing to put one up nearer to her house for her.