Take a Break stories

[Fanfeck]

And all similar kind of magazines...

The headlines are flinch worthy, usually always stories of dreadful child abuse, rape, incest, peodiphile fathers and husbands.

I imagine it's the kind of sick tragic stuff that abusers and peodiphiles actually get off on reading themselves and yet they're holiday makers favourites around the pool etc!

AIBU to wonder how there is such a high demand for people's ruined childhoods etc?

I love that there is always a woman grinning on the cover, in between the headlines of misery!

Take A Break seem to have at least SOME morals - they've led campaigns against DV and one about getting the age limit for cervical screening on the NHS lowered. Those I like to see, not sure how effective they are, but at least they're trying.

I read them sometimes, they are good for holidays. I like reveal and closer for the fashion pages. The glossy mags are just so bulky and expensive and half of it is adverts anyway. Marie Claire used to have some good articles but haven't read it for years.

Could I recommend Real People? The standard of writing for such a low end publication is reasonably acceptable and the puzzles and modest prizes are good though not anything that would encourage vulgar displays of over competitiveness or acquisitiveness.

I always look out for their regular Pet Of The Week feature and find the captions to pictures of root vegetables that look like penises more amusing than I should.

They've definitely upped the misery and child abuse stories. Chat rates them with a shock value out of 10 now. It's definitely gone downhill, lots of the stories are now just reprints from US mags of the same ilk.

I prefer the classic stories - friends falling out with each other over a bingo win, mother shagging daughter's love rat boyfriend etc. I love the writing style "we had loads in common, we both loved fish and chips and watching TV". "Child from a previous relationship" is a phrase you only find in these magazines (in every story).

The best thing I've ever seen in TAB was a top tip which I can remember word for word 20 years later:
"My husband Leonard often suffers from diarrhoea when we're on holiday so I stock up on carrier bags to use as a handy pair of incontinence pants" complete with a picture of poor Leonard naked wearing only an Argos carrier bag as a nappy.
It had such a huge reaction, they reprinted it a few weeks later for anyone who had missed it.

I remember Leonard and the Argos bag too youremywifenow .

The Argos logo was perfectly centred. I don't know why they didn't use it in their promotional material

Impossible to forget limited I wish I'd kept it.

I want to see Leonard!

Poor Leonard !

I buy them if they are by the till. They are a bit boring though but I live the consumer reviews or weight loss stories. I actually entered my husband into fit fella of the week and his picture got published.

Oh Leonard!

Some of those tips are atrocious though. I liked the sanitary towels as insoles!

Really love the tips, and the inane photos ("here's my husband in a novelty hat!") I also really enjoy the bizarre juxtaposition of cheery cover photo lady, breezy mag title and the often horrific headlines.

I love the Take A Shit ripoff that Viz comic does - it's brilliant, right down to the inane anecdotes printed that only the grandmother/wife sending it in could find funny. And the headlines like 'He put a SPOON in the KNIFE DRAWER!!!! - One woman's true premenstrual hell'

Just saw that funny

People send in a picture of their toddler naked on a potty reading a copy of the magazine and think that's enough to win a £5 Boots voucher. I pity them. They seriously misunderestimate the nature of reality magazines.

I hold Leonard and the Argos nappy as my gold standard and judge all other entries accordingly.

Yesterday I watched Michael Johnson after his 400m world record had been smashed after 17 years, saying that he didn't mind. He was lying his arse off, of course. I could see it in his eyes.

It is my opinion that Leonard's record will never be surpassed. Not in my lifetime, anyway

Somebody on here must have a picture of Leonard? Let's make him famous once more!

I definitely had a picture of Leonard and also of my favourite TAB My Operation story.

It was the story of a woman who had radical surgery for vulval cancer. The bit when a nurse took her to her loo and she 'reached down, and all my fluffy bits had gone' had me in tears.

I was crying for a different reason when her husband visited her and said: 'It's not as if we use them much any more, love. I still have you.'

Joking aside, I do think that's tragic, yet uplifting.

I watched Michael Johnson aswell. Didn't the other presenter poke him with it though? Rubbing his shoulder and saying are you ok several times throughout.
They didn't show his reaction aswell just the aftermath.

I'll try to dig them out but fear they might have been lost in a tragic house fire

Oh they all do that. Did you see Jessica Ennis-Hill repeatedly asking the reporter not to make her cry after she'd been beaten in the heptathlon? I think it's his job to ask but I wouldn't be averse to footage of her decking him

take a shit.

Honestly, the Take A Shit spoofs are fantastic. I'll have to paw through all my old copies of Viz to get pics now, for everyone's viewing pleasure!

If people want to read those shit magazines, that's really up to them. What makes me really angry is that they're placed at child eye height on the shelves of small supermarkets. I do not want my children having to read about rape, violence against women and incest as we queue to pay for our shopping. Those magazines should be put in plain packaging and sold on the top shelves like lads' mags. I always turn them over when I'm queuing. Disgusting lowest common denominator shit that children shouldn't be exposed to.

Meh, i like them. I like to enter the puzzles when i can be arsed.