14 year old dd's friend is pregnant

[PurpleTango]

My 14 year old dd has told me that her 14 year old friend is pregnant by a 15 year old boy - We'll call him Tom. She showed me FB pics and girl is definitely pregnant. Friend has not told her parents who the father is. Tom is the grandson of a very good friend of mine. I also have a lot to do with his mother. I babysat for her and her brother many moons ago and see them regularly. I saw both mother and grandmother yesterday - I bumped into them in town and we caught up with family chat. Nothing they said gave me the impression they had any idea that the son/grandson is about to become a father. In fact they told me what a wonderful boy Tom is (as they usually do). He is not "wonderful" and never has been. I really don't think they know half of what he gets up to. AIBU to pretend I have no idea of recent events? The girl hasn't disclosed the identity of her baby's father but both are telling their friends who the father is -and bragging about it- This is not going to end well is it?

[PurpleTango]

DD had been told very quickly to stay out of the social media messages. That was possibly the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with but glad I did. I wont post the conversation or what has since happened. All I can say is my friend appreciates that I told her and will act accordingly and for the best.

Loving the posts about my DD must be pregnant - or will be soon- because her friend is! :D DD is the third 3 teen in our house. Number one became a dad at the age or 25 and number two has lots of friends who are now mothers. She isn't - at 23. Makes me wonder how peoples minds work tbh. There is nothing at all to say my DD will soon become pregnant because someone she sits next to at lessons in school is. Madness!!

[ShipwreckedAndComatose]

This sounds like the right decision to me, glad that, through the weirdness, You got support here.

[Ketchuponpizza]

Late to the party, but Purple, I think you have played this perfectly. I think you are a good friend, and mum!

[Meadows76]

I would have to say something. If you value the friendship anyway. Imagine if it were your child involved and your freinds never told you something

[Leeds2]

I think you made the right decision. Hope things work out, for all concerned.

[chocoLit]

Well done purple. Handled with compassion, respect & dignity.

[SirVixofVixHall]

You do sound like a thoughtful friend. I agree, much better to hear this from someone who really cares about you than on the grapevine.

[WeAllHaveWings]

Well done purple, I'm sure your friend will have appreciated you having her back. It's a pet hate of mine when other parents know when a child has a problem but no one tells the actual parents who are in the position to support them.

It's not always easy telling another parent their child has shoplifted/bullied etc but I've done it on more than one occasion and it's always worked out for the best and parents have appreciated the heads up.

[almostthirty]

Well done what a horrible situation. You handled it very well. You may need a --very big

[Neome]

Thoughtfully done, I hope your mind is at rest now, have a good holiday

[EweAreHere]

I think you did the right thing, Purple. They can't support their child if they don't know what's going on, whether it's actually his potential baby or not.

[goddessoftheharvest]

Well done, you did the right thing. How does your DD feel about you telling? I bet in her heart of hearts she is relieved. I remember at that age, being worried about friends, the combination of sick apprehension but utter relief when the adults took over

[Peanut14]

I think you did the right thing Purple, you are a good friend. I would want to be told about 'rumours' about my family, truth in them or not.