to think people are arseholes?

[RosieWithTheGoodHair]

Not all of them. But another thread reminded me of something that happened to me when I was young and naïve (pretty much c+p from thread - those who read both aren't having déjà vu!):

In my early twenties I got chatting to and then bought a(n assumed) homeless man a drink in a pub.
My friend took a shine to him and invited him back to his flag where the three of us had an impromptu party - drink, drugs etc. he partook in both.
Woke up on the sofa the next day and our new friend had gone. So had all excess alcohol, plastic bags which had trace amounts of drugs in etc. The flat was actually comparatively tidy.
Went home, two days later went to withdraw some money from the cash point - card gone. Went bank - account empty.

The police had CCTV of him at the cash point down the road that morning, but because he must have seen my PIN when I bought him the drink there was no official crime committed according to the bank, I should have been more careful. Which I agree with.

My passcode on my phone was the same as my card at the time (I knooow) so I've always assumed he saw/kind of saw my PIN and then when I yelled my passcode to my friend who was wanting to change a song he had a lightbulb moment.

People are arseholes sometimes despite your best intentions.

Discuss.

I said I was stupid - I know I was stupid!

This will sound harsh, but people are often homeless for a reason and you have to factor all that in when choosing how to interact with them. they are not necessarily like you.

Makingacupoftea, it's not something I tend to do either. I buy them a takeaway toastie and a tea and go home with my smug middle class conscience intact.

He will have spent the £700 on a bender, and how come he could take it all out in one go anyway? There is normally an upper limit to what you can withdraw in one day ....

Sone harsh responses no here. . Then on as trying to be kind to someone less fortunate than herself.
However the bit that struck me was the flat was relatively tidy - at least he cleaned up for you.

Oh dear. You were naive and trusting and got taken for a ride. Sometimes I feel sorry for drunks/down and outs but I'd never invite one into my home. You have learnt the hard way that it was a silly thing to do.

Will the bank be able/willing to recompense you? Probably not. Take this as a tough lesson and don't ever do it again.

Yes there are lots of shitty types out there but most are decent. Just never, ever be this trusting again.

BoffinMum he did it over the two days. The first cash point had a working cctv camera and the second didn't

Well there you go.
You set the situation up for him and he did what some people do.
Most people are honest, a certain small percentage aren't.
Who knew?

You can withdraw £350:£500 (whatever daily limit is) on a card then go ahead and get cash back at tills in co-op or Asda on the same day.

I don't think people are being harsh, what does op really want people to say? She was careless, yes the guy was an arse but still op put herself into that situation. She is very fortunate something worse did not happen to her.

I would view it as a lesson learned and as motivation to never do something like that again.

Ok my title should read 'some people'

I just recall being so gobsmacked that he'd do this after we'd been so 'nice' (IMO at the time) to him and thought I'd share the story.

Just be grateful you weren't murdered as some poor sods are when they take strangers back home.

Definitely plenty of arseholes out there. But you were incredibly naive to expect that someone who was a total stranger and clearly down on their luck wouldn't take advantage of you somehow. Could have been a lot worse, lesson learned eh! He probably couldn't believe his luck that night and still laughs about it now

Have you been watching too many Disney movies?!

To everyone saying I was a div and should have taken it as a lesson (too many to name individually) - I was and I did. I know that a hell of a lot worse could have happened to me. I wanted to share out of self deprecation more than anything. It's a story is all but forgotten until today and it felt so dramatic at the time that I wanted to talk about it.
But I do also think it's interesting to see the split between those who think he was basically within his rights to do if and those who agree that he was an arsehole. I'm somewhere in the middle, I think. And much less naive and hopefully at least slightly less stupid.

Those who have misunderstood my OP - this wasn't recent. The card, money and man are long gone. Sharing a memory, that's all.

'Discuss'

Gives me THE RAGE

I got mugged twice when I was young and naive. Shit happens, people are indeed arseholes. No discussion needed.

I don't think people are arseholes, generally. Sure, some are. You'll always find a dickhead everywhere you go. But a far, far larger proportion of the population is always the good folk; the ones who'd hand in a wallet, stop for an injured dog, leave your cash card where it was. It's just that the dickheads leave a bigger trail of carnage behind so are more memorable.

Whoooo that's true. But I will also never forget the man who chased me down the road to give me my last £10 which I had left in the cash point because I was so distracted by the fact that it was my last £10

*You're very lucky you weren't raped or bludgeoned to death.

Grow up*

Fucking hell. No need.

I don't suppose you grew up in a small village op? I remember being astounded at how horrible people can be when I moved to the big city as a student. A bit sheltered I suppose.

99.9% of people are wankers. If you assume that, then you won't be disappointed.

Some are.

You met one. But it is a good idea to remember the other times when people have been anything but.

People are rarely homeless solely because they have no money. They're homeless because they have chaotic and vulnerable lives (which often results in having no money, amongst other things).

I work with vulnerable people who could easily be in the situation the man you describe was in. In my experience, vulnerable people can often hurt those who try to 'help' them the most, for a variety of reasons - control, distrust, habit.

I don't think it was good or decent of him to rob you, of course not. He was a bit of an arsehole. There's probably a pretty depressing reason why he behaved as he did though - not an excuse, but an explanation.

Thank goodness you weren't hurt. You lived and learned.

You're so an idiot for not checking your wallet straight away.

It's not his right, it's his opportunity.