AIBU to decline to sponsor a head-shaving to raise money for a cancer charity?

[erinaceus]

An acquaintance requested sponsorship to shave their head to raise money for a cancer charity.

I feel vaguely uneasy about this, and almost repulsed. It strikes me as in massively poor taste. I do not plan to mention my disapproval, but I almost feel moved to make a separate donation to the cancer charity, which of course I can go ahead and do. However the strength of my emotional reaction came as a bit of a shock to me - it's not as if I lost my own hair to chemotherapy or know anyone close to me who did.

I typically sponsor people for things, as long as it is a cause I support - this is my choice and I know that not everyone likes to sponsor people, which I think is totally fine. This one, however, just feels wrong to me.

I have no plans to say anything to the person who asked for sponsorship - I do not know them that well. I was more trying to understand whether in general this is seen as someone raising funds by being a good sport or whether other people see it as a fundraising exercise that misses the mark.

Thanks lrelephant. She dealt with it very graciously right until the end. This thread has just reminded me I've been intending to donate to the hospice who cared for her so thanks everyone.

Interesting read, albeit a few months old now.

It's interesting, the psychology of why some people sponsor and some don't.
Yes, it's the individual's choice to say no or to simply ignore a request but to do so really is a slap in the face the individual. It simply says 'f**k you', "I don't care about your hardship or about your cause or about your mum who died of cancer" etc, etc
I ask everyone here, "how much do YOU ''waste' every day on your daily coffee or sandwich or chocolate bar?" Can't just one of these go instead to the charity?
I reckon that sponsorship success is about 1% of all persons asked. Not very good really, is it?
It's a very sorry state of our 21st century living when we're more interested in ourselves and our modern lifestyles than to help others. And even slate those who do try to help.

Very, very sad indeed :-(

I think that we miss the point.

It is NOT about the head-shaving, or the 5k run or the mammoth challenge. Invariably, it is just about trying to raise money for a worthy cause. A charity. Linking that to 'something', anything is just an excuse or a focus. A bit of fun. It saves walking around with a bucket and 'begging'.

I think that anyone who shows some initiative to do anything for someone else is worthy of a small donation. I agree, we don't want to pay for their expedition around the world or whatever it might be but, if ALL monies raised go to the charity then I'm all for it.

Sell me a good story and I'll give you a tenner! A fabulous story or hardship or challenge and it's likely to be more.... :-)

YANBU OP. I don't like seeing healthy people do this nor do I like seeing cheery young bucket-rattlers shouting about boobs and balls on my commute. These aren't joke illnesses.

Maybe this is effective for them, I dunno. Prefer to give money in a quieter way.

Anyone can jog 5k around a local park but shaving your head actually shows a bit of a sacrifice

Quite. I think it is something that actually involves some sort of personal sacrifice. 5k, 10k, skydive (where most of sponsorship goes to skydive). Jog. On.

It's interesting, the psychology of why some people sponsor and some don't

I don't like the expectation that I should donate to your charity of choice. SO your granddad die of heart disease and you want to raise money for BHF? Ok, cool. But I have 4 causes that I donate to regularly and, in my opinion, are a 'better' use of my money.

Having had cancer treatment myself I find it tasteless.

When I had chemo I lost my hair and it didn't bother me but I know for many people it was the worst aspect of treatment. But unless the hair is being donated for wigs it seems a little self indulgent to me.it seems a little look at me, I am so wonderful. Just give the money and keep your ears warm! Now that was the worst thing about being bald.

Cancer survivors, sufferers or relatives of the aforementioned dont have the last word on what other people donor don't do for charity. For what it's worth I think anyone trying to raise some money for charity in any way deserves support and not to be made to feel like they might be trying to show off or that they might Be insulting to those people they're trying to help...

Donate or don't... but don't pick apart the movies of people trying to do "a nice thing"...

I ask everyone here, "how much do YOU ''waste' every day on your daily coffee or sandwich or chocolate bar?" Can't just one of these go instead to the charity?

How far do you take it though, is it morally wrong to spend any money on frivolities as that money could go to charity instead? What about buying a bigger car than you need or a house with an extra bedroom- are these things wrong as the money could go to charity instead? Anything other than gruel and water a waste? Therefore, I think we all have to find a level of giving we're comfortable with a stick to that.

I have a sibling, the least well-off off all of us, but she is the most generous. Unbelievably so! Not generalising but, it does seem that the amount of giving (not just money, but also time) is inversely proportional to the amount that one has. Perhaps that's why... ;-)

Not rich in material goods but rich in soul.

Bleh, sponsor them or not, it's up to you.

It's a method of fundraising encouraged my Macmillan and it raises more than a cake sale.

Can't you just be proud of your friend for raising money for charity?