to think LTB just got a whole lot harder (domestic abuse related)

[HelenaDove]

Just saw this article. Women have been living in refuges for over a year due to lack of housing.

Women are returning to their abusers rather than face homelessness

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/life/unsafe-damp-and-dirty-how-unscrupulous-landlords-take-advantage/?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter

Just I have seriously considered it.

Sounds pathetic but I feel like if I lose that link with my children's names then that's something else he has taken away from me.

If I were to change I would go all out glamour/cheese it would have to be Chardonnay La Ferrari or something

My God its spinning back to pre 1970s

Not pathetic at all Elsa

On top of that why should you have to change your name for an easier life?

It's a part of you and like you said, you change it, he wins again

Elsa my support worker printed off the 100 most common surnames and I picked one blind!!!! Crazy but true.
I do think it has helped me take something back though. Make a new life as Miss "new name" even though yes my children do still have his name as legally it cannot be changed without his consent.

If you're going to have an alter ego for officialdom it almost HAS to be something frivolous!

It's not as though Fifi Van Beaujolais e en sounds as unlikely as it once would have done (?)

Elsa What about changing your "first" name.

Lots of people are known by their middle names so if you are current Susan Smith then you become Elizabeth Susan Smith. You register on everything as E Smith or Elizabeth Smith but everyone you actually know calls you by your middle name ie Susan.

Obviously depends how common /uncommon your surname is. (Both my maiden name and my married name are very common,)

But I know what you mean about the DC's names.

You couldn't get more common than my surname....in fact you've already mentioned it

www.theguardian.com/society/2016/jan/26/benefit-cap-on-social-housing-will-leave-thousands-homeless-landlords-warn this is what I was referring to about cuts to housing benefit.
If I recall correctly it has been delayed but is still going to happen. Someone else might know more...

Agree it's further cuts to housing benefit that sees extra supporting housing shelters refuges even warden accomadation is not included in extra money so you either make it up or charities try make up the differences.

Is your surname Beaujelais, Need?

Yes! How did you know?

In London some areas have up to 10 years waiting list

Having an 'official' name but still using my name is actually something I've never thought of (my support worker has stopped coming now as they are only funded for so long and I'm doing OK now).

That might well be the perfect compromise. I wish I had asked on here before the elections.

Thank you guys

Sorry for the hijack op

You havent hijacked at all Elsa

elsa

You can go on the Roll but you have to request omition from the public one. It's easier than it sounds.

I'm on it but not on it and never have been if that makes sense

Friw I spend a lot my day locating refuge accomadation for families (it's the bit of my job I enjoy the most) it used to be simple now it's like a very advanced chess game,

And actually running a few myself and a network of safe houses does not help a huge amount

I did go to register.

The one that isn't public is still accessible to various places (and I believe are sold to some also).

The council can't or won't tell you who can access the private register.

You can have your name totally omitted if you have a very recent conviction against your ex and it is sufficiently violent enough the bar for getting onto that is set very high and you need a lot of proof which most victims of dv don't have.

I thought it better to not go on at all as the council were so secretive about who can access the private register.

I'm sorry- have I understood this thread correctly? You have to pay to stay in a refuge?
I am staggered.
I honestly had no idea. How can they help those that need it the most if you have to pay to stay there?

Housing benefit currently covers the rent Mach

It costs a fortune to stay because of the staff and security and support needed.

Yes you have to pay and it's usually quite expensive - for me £201/week for one room plus £13/ week service charge compared to my current rent in a 3 bedroom house of £110/week.

That's a fortune!

I know nothing is free,housing benefit helps and you need the support from staff but that is nuts.

We pay £600 a month for a 3 bed house

Housing benefit covered mine too but they want to change it so the amount of housing benefit would be capped even in supported housing.
Also the overall benefit cap affects larger families like mine.

Just a quick regard to your small business - many companies offer a service where by they are the registered address for a business and receive and forward mail (usually by scanning and forwarding) so that might be worth looking into

Absolutely la I would never have been able to leave if the benefits cap had been 2 children. It's terrifying to think what the future holds for women in abusive relationships.