to want in laws to correctly pronounce my very ordinary name?

[DrSeuss]

I have a very ordinary, English-of-Greek-origin name. Spelled in the traditional way, couldn't e simpler, really.
For over twenty years, ILs have mispronounced it. For twenty years, I and my husband have periodically corrected them. Not a huge thing, granted but it grates every time they say it wrongly.

AIBU to slightly mispronounce their names just a little, e.g. Sarah becomes Sorah, Jim becomes Jom? Childish, I know, but it is pretty much the only thing I have asked of them in twenty years! Other family members ask for and receive special food despite having no real grounds for this or meals served at a particular time despite having no children. I'd just like them to say my name without me mentally wincing!

I would probably say ' Hell-un" but obviously not in a stilted way! Just for the record I am welsh but have lived in yorkshire for 20 years.

Hell-in sounds like posh pronunciation to me.

I know it's a name, and therefore very very personal to you. BUT, if it's their accent it would be like a person from Manchester coming to my house and asking to use the "Barthroom". They'd never do it. They are saying the same word (bathroom) in their own minds.

Sorry, but are you saying we should pronounce Helen to rhyme with... hen?

Hell-un surely is the proper way?

Hell-en of Troy - nah sounds wrong.

NotYoda your mum has got to be from the West Midlands with those pronounciations 😂

no, she just wants the second syllable to be 'en' and not 'in' or 'un'. Hel-en. as its written. I really can't see how that requires a 'humongous' amount of concentration?!
I'm welsh, my natural instinct is to pronounce 'ear' as 'yer' but I can easily not do it.

I would say He-lun unless told otherwise - the pronounciation you use sounds more like the French version Hélène

I can understand how it must irritate you but it seems unlikely that they are doing it in a deliberate attempt to upset or annoy you. I do think some people struggle to detect subtle differences in pronounciation more than others

I have two sets of in-laws (dh's parents divorced and both remarried) and three out of the four call me by the wrong name. It's a mispronunciation thing but it actually creates a different name. It's not this but is like Susan, Suzanne, Susannah etc. I have known them for 20 years so unlikely to change anytime soon.

No, Helen. Both e sounds are the same. Rather like the e in hen, as previously stated. the l sounds like the l in help!

Not Yoda. I think you are probably right. But that's OK.

Far

Well somewhere deep in her genes, maybe, but actually London!

She also calls her Ford KA, a "Ford Kay-ay" (the whole point is that the KA is a pun on the word "car")

I have never, for example, issued my hosts with a type written list one A4 page in length stating what I will or will not eat and in what combinations

I bet it was in size 10 font and single-spaced as well. Arschloch,

Not Yoda - i think some people genuinley cannot "hear" the difference. it's a phonogical awareness thingy

You are spot on correct. And once a mispronunciation is learned and is embedded in deep memory, it's a real bugger to eradicate and re-learn.

My own DH insists on saying "refuge" instead of "refuse" and "single" instead of "signal".

I am this close {gritted teeth} to 40 years in Styles . . . .

OP

I don't want to sound unsympathetic. I must be galling if their general attitude to you is not great.

I say it how you do. Everyone I know does except my very posh grandmother. I totally get why it grates.

It's not the same as accents though is it. I assume most people can say scone in the two common ways. So if that was a persons name rather than a cake, then you could physically say the word either way so doing it in the way the person in question does is therefore the polite thing to do

Im north west and have repeated it over and over and im saying hell an

Just went back and read it in my head in a London accent and makes sense too... I read it in a proper black country accent first time round haha

I don't think I could ever say Helen to rhyme with Hen. I'm so sorry.

Thank you, Flibbidy.

I hereby rename my in laws Sorah and Jom!

I say hell-un

My daughter had just asked me why i keep saying helen.

My step-dads cousin is called Helen, and both he and his parents insist on calling her Hell-in. It drives me up the wall, and he gets extremely annoyed with me what I point it out...going to show him this thread!!

Highwaydragon i thought i did too, but after much repetition i think i hear the a.

DrSeuss

Do it sooper posh:
Sehrah
Jem

not sure about this
a lot of people have trouble pronouncing my name - you learn to see when they are simply not making the effort and it is very annoying

but the comments you make about food etc suggest this is about something else

also, it does sound accent based so there's a bit of me wondering if they are honestly not hearing the pronunciation as you want it, so keep getting it wrong. Maybe there's other issues you need to address with them?

Lmao i just asked my 6 year old how to spell helen After od repeated it a few times, and she said H-E-L-O-N.

Do it Dr Seuss. Maybe Sorah and Jam tho?