To pay for a sleep consultant for my baby?

[Rowenleaves]

My baby is 4 months old and his sleeping is pretty bad. He will only fall asleep if I feed him and can wake up to 6 times in a night. I've tried different things but nothing works for long.

Has anyone had any success with a sleep consultant? I've heard mixed things about them.

My friend had one who apparently changed her life. Baby went from waking every hour to sleeping 7-7 in less than a week. Part of her technique is controlled crying and she had to listen to the baby cry for an hour the first night though which I would find so hard. I just feel that I need to teach him how to sleep though and it can't be healthy for him to be waking so frequently.

My son just turned six months and typically wakes every hour.

He goes down around 6.30pm. I put him in his cot wide awake. I don't feed him before 5am.

When he wakes in the night I will leave him 5 min before shh patting him. I don't pick him up.

His daytime naps are good and he usually sleeps 11am-12.30pm.

I am exhausted and don't know what else to try.

Do sleep consultants teach me anything I am not already doing??

I think I am dead inside :(

Yes, what do sleep consultant actually say? Is it just variations on "let the baby alone a bit more"?

This all sounds pretty normal to me, I'm sure mine were like it.
We didn't have consultants or internet, so I just tried things that my dm, mil and other wiser older family members suggested.
If you don't have any of these and you need the confidence to tackle sleep regression then of course pay for it, but it seems pretty normal to me.

NewtoCornland - can't work out how to pm on the app. Can you message me & I'll see if I can reply?

My friend had one who apparently changed her life. Baby went from waking every hour to sleeping 7-7 in less than a week. Part of her technique is controlled crying and she had to listen to the baby cry for an hour the first night though which I would find so hard. I just feel that I need to teach him how to sleep though and it can't be healthy for him to be waking so frequently.

Sorry, but that sounds fucking horrible.

Do you know anything about baby development? Do you know why babies are so dependent on their parents for so long? Do you know that adults don't sleep through the night?

I'd suggest that rather than stressing your baby by teaching them that they deserve to be ignored you reconsider the reasonableness of your expectations.

I think the advantage of a consultant is they'll do it (whilst you nap peferably) I would expect a sleep consultant to be capable of doing something a little more sophisticated and intelligent than controlled crying though

He goes down around 6.30pm. I put him in his cot wide awake. I don't feed him before 5am

Ever likely he wakes every hour. Why are you starving your child?

My sleep consultant specialises in gentle sleep solutions. They don't all do cc.

Oh bog off hecant

That's what I thought rozdeek- I looked at one who was a former HV and would expect them to have a few different solutions dependant on the baby. One size doesn't fit all

Hecant don't be so bloody rude. You don't know a thing about their nights

Babies wake regularly at night, that is normal. Babies are not programmed to sleep 12 hours straight at night.

Sleep consultants do one thing and one thing only - train your baby that there's no point in crying because they are just being ignored. Controlled crying is a horrible thing to do to a baby. A baby needs comfort and security, not be left in a room to just get distressed and cry themselves to sleep. That is not a healthy way to promote sleep to an infant.

roses2 - are you saying that you do not feed your 6 month old from 6.30pm to 5am, despite your baby waking at night? WTF? Why don't you feed him?!

A tiny study recently showed that babies over 6 months old left to cry for 2 minutes - that's 2 minutes, not a sodding hour - learned to go to sleep better and stayed asleep for longer. Each night the time allowed increased by 2 minutes. Anyone leaving a 4 month old to cry for an hour wants their head wobbled.

edition.cnn.com/2016/05/24/health/cry-it-out-sleep-training-ok/

He gets a big bottle at 6pm then a top up breast feed around 10pm.

Six month old babies don't need feeds in the night!

Roses2, I think you're wrong, and you can't generalise for all babies. Milk is a baby's main food till 1, and some do need milk at night up to that age.

Can't you just put them in bed with you-then you don't really have to wake up to feed them?

Also, if you sleep with them I think they were up much less (ime!)

Some do want milk and lots don't wake For it at 6m. If Rosie's baby doesnt need it why the shock that she doesn't feed him overnight? My babies stopped feeding overnight at 4Mknths- they still woke sometimes but weren't fed, what's wrong with that?

If 6 month old + babies don't need feeds through the night then someone needs to have a word with my DS as he appears to have missed that memo, lol!

I'd love recommendations of gentle parenting sleep consultants, please. DS is one (today!), has never slept through the night, I'm back at work full time, and we need some help!

Of COURSE some 6 month olds need feeds in the night!

I can't stand this whole sleep consultant BS. There are lots of books out there that will tell you exactly what to do to teach your baby that no one is going to respond to its cries between two utterly arbitrary moments on the clock. Either have the balls to do it yourself or don't do it?!

But rose said her baby wakes every hour. If the baby was sleeping through then fair enough.