Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

Do i need to tell them about ds party fee?

23 replies

Jayne266 · 03/08/2016 22:33

It's my ds birthday party and we have hired a soft play for a private party. Now ds has invited his school friends etc but a lot of them have younger siblings. Do I inform them that if they want to bring them the softplay will charge a entrance fee and party food is not included or is this common knowledge. Apologies but I only have one ds and didn't want to upset anyone on the day. Should I pre warn them as we have paid the set fee for the children who have been invited.

OP posts:

Masketti · 03/08/2016 22:34

Yes pre warn even though anyone with half a brain knows the deal someone will be a knob.

edwinbear · 03/08/2016 22:35

I put on the bottom of DD's invitations "Apologies but we are unable to accommodate siblings due to number restrictions" which made it clear.

DragonsEggsAreAllMine · 03/08/2016 22:36

If it's a private party then it's usually closed to siblings, it's an added bonus to stop unwanted guests.

molyholy · 03/08/2016 22:37

I would say this is the norm. There are alot of younger siblings in dd's class. If they bring the siblings along, they pay entry fee, and usually get the sibling some food when the party invitees are eating, or they carry on playing in the soft play area.

Floggingmolly · 03/08/2016 22:39

Why wouldn't they understand that it's not a family invitation; it's for the named child only?

Original poster

Jayne266 · 03/08/2016 22:41

I never thought to put it on the invitations when I had done them and the party is on Sunday. So I was going to send a general message around to the mums. It's my ds first proper party with his friends (he will be 4) i will be 38 weeks pregnant and I just want a stress free day.

OP posts:

OneEpisode · 03/08/2016 22:42

I wouldn't think it essential to pre warn if you have written an invitation naming one child and naming a party location where admission is charged. That's readonably clear.
The only ambiguity is in your OP you said you had hired a soft play. If guests think you have the whole of a venue they might be inclined to think extras won't cost you anything extra...

Comiconce · 03/08/2016 22:42

Most places have a list, either pre-printed at the entrance or a list where every child attending puts their name down. If you have paid a set fee for a limited number of children I would print their names out and give this to the soft play place to be ticked off. It should be obvious that siblings aren't part of the party although some may sneak in to help themselves to the food...

Atinybittiredandsad · 03/08/2016 22:42

Mmm people are Cheeky op

We did what edwin did as trust me you need to.

totalrecall1 · 03/08/2016 22:43

This happens all the time. You don't expect siblings to be allowed to go in free and you certainly don't expect they get fed! The invite is for the one child, the parent pays if they want to bring another. I wouldn't worry about it - it's perfectly normal

SnookieSnooks · 03/08/2016 22:43

Well it would be obvious to me that I would have to pay for any siblings and there would
Be no party food etc .... BUT having run many parties the bare-faced cheek of some seemingly reasonable people has amazed me.... In particular on arrival at party 'oh, DC2 so wants to stay at your party... That's ok, isn't it...' GRRR!

SavoyCabbage · 03/08/2016 22:45

When you get there, give the soft play people a list of your guests and let them deal with it. They will have done it lots of times.

OneEpisode · 03/08/2016 22:46

You could send something like "people have been asking how much it is for siblings; just in case you were interested it would be £ for under x years, and the cafe is open from 11 to 3."

TheCrumpettyTree · 03/08/2016 22:49

If I have to bring my youngest to a soft play party then I pay for him, keep him away from the party and buy his food. The other parents I've seen do the same. It's obvious to me, but some people seem to think siblings are also invited.

TheCrumpettyTree · 03/08/2016 22:50

The soft plays I've been to take a list of party guests and check names on the way in.

Comiconce · 03/08/2016 22:52

Definitely go by list. I have seen soft play staff check a list filled in by parents and cross out a younger sibling that was 'accidentally' listed on the party list. The parent/guardian was requested to come to reception and made to cough up for the younger child. This party also had lunch boxes for each invited child so there was no free for all for the hordes of randoms lining up to be fed. Made my day (I'm sad like that and after years of parties get irrationally angry at parents turning up with multiple children, fully expecting them to be included)

gillybeanz · 03/08/2016 22:52

Get somebody to tell them on arrival, dh perhaps

purplefox · 03/08/2016 22:53

We've done several parties at a soft play with limited numbers so no room for siblings, I've never mentioned anything about siblings and it's never been an issue.

RatOnnaStick · 03/08/2016 22:58

Certainly at our local soft play children are checked off a list by name before the gate is buzzed open. Its not physically possible to gain entry without invitation or payment at the entrance desk when shoes are removed.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 03/08/2016 22:59

If I have to turn up with a sibling in tow, because I've got no one else to have her, I always say I'll pay seperately and usually stay and supervise. It's only polite.

Original poster

Jayne266 · 03/08/2016 23:02

I seem to have had the same idea as most of you and gave them a list today, so hopefully this will help.

OP posts:

ShelaghTurner · 03/08/2016 23:04

People are cheeky buggers though. We had a soft play party for dd1 and when it came to sitting down there was no room at the tables for an invited child or dd2, both of whom had been accounts for, because two siblings had their arses on a seat. Then you feel bad for uprooting the child because it's not their fault their parents are tossers.

SavoyCabbage · 04/08/2016 13:04

That's happened today me too. My own dd whose birthday it was had nowhere to sit. I picked up the toddlers and shooed them. Like weeding.

Flip