To ask any mexican spanish speakers or Mexican mumsnetters to help with saying not to be a Feathery Stroker.

[mountaininthehills]

As title really.

Someone I'm dating.

I'm not really on a boyfriend hunt but I do like him, we've been dating for a few months, he's physically attractive to me, and would like not to "throw the baby out with the bathwater" at this stage.

We ended up on his bed last week and he's a feathery stroker

attribute this the fact that he isn't as sexually experienced as me (both in our early 30's but I spent my 20's dating lots of men and he spent his 20's becoming a brilliant academic. so swings and roundabouts).

I feel confident about giving him direction and telling him where he is going wrong, and feel he would be receptive to this, but due to the language difference I want a way to express this diplomatically as obviously I don't want to be a twat and hurt his feelings?

Something like "I prefer a firmer touch" or "that doesn't feel great but I prefer this". It IS shit but I don't just want to say "that is shit" in Spanish.

Not meeting in a touchy context soon (we're going to lunch before I get a flight on Wednesday so it's not going to be a problem for then) so I need some lines for about two weeks time.

Rather than risk saying something wrong, why not guide his hand so it's firmer with a little no? Much less direct than saying that you prefer a stronger touch. If you really want Spanish, try 'más fuerte' which is stronger.

Do you speak Spanish? Because if not, coming out with a random Spanish phrase criticising his sex technique will seem really weird

we live in the UK. I'm learning spanish (not to do with him its an ongoing thing to do with travel plans) but still very basic so it's 95% English. we haven't really "talked about sex" as it would be a bit odd before now.

(I'd be happy saying in English but I could see it being misinterpreted from his end?)