To move from the big smog to the Highlands?

[Rattusn]

I have lived in London all my life, and it has been a bit of a love/hate relationship. I do love all the local facilities, and rarely for London, we do have some community. We do however live in a very deprived area, and I can already see my primary school age child becoming very streetwise, and being exposed to things I would rather she wasn't. The local secondary options are appalling ( very rough - think heavy gang involvement and frequent physical fights). If we stayed I would be dreading what will happen at age 11.

Our area is very high crime, and has a lot of social problems. Very ethnically diverse without much integration, with the resultant issues.

We have holidayed in the Highlands and it has been divine: Stunning scenery, with lovely friendly people, and altogether much more child friendly. Afaik all Scottish children go to their local school, so no more trekking across London because I couldn't get a place at a nearer school. House prices here are also incredibly good value for money after being used to London prices.

Altogether it seems like a an easy decision, but I'm not sure that it is pie in the sky. Aibu to uproot my dc across the country?

Inverness is super as is the moray coast. Elgin etc

And we're all lovely

I think clueless's posts are very, very interesting.

Clearly some people don't want to believe this goes on in the lovely, lovely highlands of Scotland. It most certainly does.

Rattusn I know people that use drugs recreationally at wkds, there are pockets of areas with drug problems although it's really on a smaller scale. As for Inverness, there are several homeless shelters/hostels behind the High Street and the residents seem to be put out through the day so they naturally hang around the city centre. Unfortunately a few of these people have drink/drug issues.

It is a very safe place though - I don't ever lock my doors when we go out!

As for anti- English, I have never seen it. Lots of my colleagues, neighbours, mum's from school and they have never had issues. I certainly don't have a problem with new people moving into the area, it will only make the community better!!

I'm not saying I don't believe clueless . Her story is tragic and I'm sorry to hear it. I just hope that it isn't representative of Inverness in general. When we went there, and on this forum, there are a lot of people who say that is a good place to live.

lost thank you for the balanced account. I don't imagine that Inverness would be drug or crime free, but it from the official statistics it has a lot lot less than London.

My main worry would be about being isolated socially, as I only have one friend who lives in Inverness. TBH though, despite living in London all my life, I don't have that many friends here. London can be an incredibly isolating place, despite all the people. I just hope I would be able to make friends when I move.

OP I can't give you the break down of what it was like growing up in Inverness in a few posts. To tell you the truth the anti English thing has likely diminished. The reason I and others like me turned to drink and drugs is because there were so few opportunities. It is an isolated place in terms of opportunity and inclusion with the rest of the country. There is a limit to what anyone expects of themselves there. The only people to have made successes of their lives have left the town.

If all you are worried about is making friends then I wouldn't, through school you would make loads.

There is no doubt it would be safer than London but there are other places which would give you the benefit without the drawbacks. Anywhere south of Inverness really.

It's funny that clueless said her dc find inverness rougher than aberdeen though. It was aberdeen I left to move back north and every day I'm glad I did. I stayed in a naice area in Aberdeen but in the 4 years since I moved I've seen crime rise there and friends and neighbours increasingly being victims of crime.
Also not saying there isn't drugs in the area but there is everywhere. It's certainly not something I see on every corner every time I'm in town. There is also far more to do than there was when I was young. Great sports facilities and plenty of options of activities for every age group. A lot of schools in the area are now participating in JROCK and rock challenge as well which promotes good behaviour and fun without alcohol and drugs.
I never regret leaving Aberdeen and moving north. In fact I feel like my dc have more to do than living in a bigger city.

My family moved from Inverness for work, but their near adult DC elected to stay. One is bringing up her own child there. My family in Aviemore returned to Edinburgh but the DC have moved back. It isn't always a one way Street. They are all happy non drug using adults. We all get a view on where we lived based on our personal experiences, that's completely natural. It is however possible to have completed different experiences in the same place at the same time. As I said before, we have regular drugs raids in the estate across from us. I am sure there are areas of town where druggies converge. None of my family have had any impact from that at all.

Youmakemydreams we live in the shire so the kids impression of Aberdeen is that of a visitor same as Inverness.

There are larger towns surrounding Inverness which have plenty of amenities - shops, swimming pools, libraries. Plus the scenery is amazing and there are loads of nature trails/walks.

Although I've grown up here most of my good friends are people I've met through work or mums from the school, I've not really kept in touch with people that I went to school with. Actually that's not true I went to school with a good friend, but we did not get on at all!!

Things aren't perfect here but there is a good standard of living plus Inverness has now just built their new university which will be a great boost to the Highlsnds.

If you would like any more info please pm me.

I've just taken a look through the thread, there are no orange marches in the Highlands. I'd never even heard of them until I moved to Glasgow.

I've lived in Inverness most of my life apart from uni, my first job after graduating, and living abroad for a few years.

Yes, there is a drugs problem, same as anywhere else, but it is not in your face and my impression is that the local police are on the case.

Unfortunately, there have been a few Orange walks in Inverness but they are not indigenous to this area - the marchers are bussed in from Central Scotland and they do not get support from the locals.

There are so many incomers to Inverness and the surrounding area that you will not stand out as being English. I can't promise that there won't ever be any good-natured ribbing about the English football team etc but that will be the extent of it unless you frequent some of the town's most insalubrious drinking howffs (which I am guessing you won't!).

Interesting to see that some posters have such a downer on Inverness. Everyone has their own experiences but I don't think that the negative descriptions given here are representative.

The only point that I think is fair is that studying and employment opportunities are more limited than further south. I decided to come back to work and have accepted the trade-off between the many benefits of living here and this drawback. Doesn't sound like it will be drawback for you jobwise anyway although perhaps something to consider for your children (although chances are they will move away at some point from home for study/work wherever you are).

Like anywhere else, you have to work at making friends but if you take advantage of the loads of clubs and activities around, you will get to meet people.

Good luck whatever you decide!

This is a really fascinating thread. I don't live where I grew up for similar reasons to clueless (drugs and alcohol). And, the paucity of ambition - in fact the hostility to it - have left a mark on me and I didn't want my children exposed to that.

The other day I saw a short teenage girl kissing a taller teen and it reminded me that in the city I rarely, if ever, see a thirty year old man chewing the face off a fourteen year old girl. Where I grew up, this was not hidden, it was normal and both parties gained status from it in their own fucked up ways. I don't know if this was a rural Highland speciality - I suspect not - and actually I don;t know if it's still perfectly socially acceptable, as it was in the 80s and earlier. But it's another tick in the 'No Way' column for me.

Just to add re paucity of ambition: amongst the people who left my Highland school around the same time as me are - off the top of my head - various chief executives/vice-presidents/directors of large private and public sector organisations in the UK and abroad, (very) senior civil servants, a playwright, an award-winning novelist, a range of people in various specialisms in the NHS, teachers, vets, university lecturers, and owners of successful SMEs etc - as well as the usual array of joiners, plumbers, mechanics, farmers, etc etc etc.

The Highlands have always been good at producing people who have gone on to excel in their chosen fields; the sad thing is that only a minority have had the chance to come back and work here (although that proportion is now increasing a bit as new opportunities open up and thanks to better transport links etc).

Incidentally, I have never seen "a 30 year old chewing off the face of a 14 year old". I suppose it depends on the circles you move in but it most certainly wouldn't be acceptable in any of the circles I move in...

"I suppose it depends on the circles you move in but it most certainly wouldn't be acceptable in any of the circles I move in..."

Well it doesn't really depend on the circles you move in if you're talking about strangers in the street though, lol.

Actually that's something I hadn't thought of in a while.

But yes, adult men and teenage girlfriends, as if it's totally fine was something that happened where I grew up too, only I left there in the late nineties, so not an eighties thing at all...

It might be a rural thing though because I've compared notes with friends from the central belt and cities and although they're from similar backgrounds they all went um, no...

I could have written a very similar post, blueberry. There are some really weird posts about Inverness on this thread, an Inverness that I certainly don't recognise.

Fair enough blueberry, it's not your experience. It really is mine!

I'm not from Inverness btw - I don't know much about it. I'm from a small, pretty remote "town" (village, really) in the Highlands. I have no doubt that there are places which have a bit more going for them, having grown through subtle differences in population and outlook. Everywhere has its own undercurrents. But look, if we pretend this is an impossibility or even just an aberration, that's dishonest.

(I did smile at your list of jobs there blueberry: we didn't have enough people in our year at school to take one of those each!)

Perfectly prepared to believe that what I saw was related to the hostels nearby. But not prepared to say I didn't see it. No different from what I see round Victoria.

I grew up in the Highlands and I couldn't get away quick enough. People were very small minded so anyone out with the straight, white, non academic, average wage 'fashion' crowd got a fairly hard time
of it.
We were very remote and it was hideously boring.
There was a lot of drugs, a good number of the boys I grew up with ended up in jail and one guy died. Underage drinking was rife as was underage sex and teen pregnancies were pretty common. Sexual assaults weren't uncommon.
There were also a lot of car crashes, as someone mentioned earlier, some of which were life changing for those involved.
I'm sure there are positives to living in the countryside but my experience was overwhelmingly negative.
I really like the central belt cities, though.

this is do you mind me asking where in the highlands this was?

May be a bit off centre but have you considered the counties of Dorset, Somerset and Wiltshire......much warmer and drier and beautiful countryside and good access to big towns....

£300K would get you a nice 4 bed house although not as much as in Scotland.

Scotland is very beautiful but the dark and wet winters may be a challenge

I havent read whole thread but im going to go over it now. Just wanted to say i think its an amazing idea.
I would totally love to do this exact thing. I live in a big city and its turning into a shit hole. I fear for the lives my dc will have.
I would love to have what i imagine to be an idyllic place for my dc to grow up.i love the Highlands and would consider close ish to Inverness.
Perhaps the reality is my dc would hate it once they were teenagers. My eldest certainly would. I believe it goes full circle though and eventually they would appreciate it.
Yes the city is great for opportunities,jobs social life etc but id defintely trade it off for a simple life. Unfortunately but dh wouldnt have the guts.
I understand the posters who have the idea of go somewhere in between and there are some lovely places but i dont think you can compare it to what the OP is considering.

dragon We would definitely want to move to Scotland if we were to move, in order to have all the benefits of living up there (free university education, much better work contract). There are other options in Scotland, such as the central belt as has been discussed, but it is quite a bit pricier than Inverness. Part of the attraction of Inverness is the amazing value for money it offers.

I'd rather not say as it will out me. However, I will say that while there's probably not more shit happening per head than anywhere else you notice it more in small communities because these are your mates from primary school going through it and there are maybe only a few dozen of you in the area. It also takes a lot of willpower on the part of both parent and
child to keep out of it for exactly the same reasons. If you live remotely and things go bad, as they did with my peer group your only real options are joining in or isolating yourself. It's not everyone's experience and certainly things got a lot better as I got into my later teens and I was mixing more with adults but it's certainly something to bear in mind, please don't think relocation to the Highlands is all jam and gravy.

There was a fair bit of 30ish guys and teenage girls going on as well. I thought that was just a 90s thing though. I didn't realise it was a countryside phenomenon.