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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To spend my money this way?

95 replies

facepalming · 31/07/2016 08:14

I'm about to move house, moving from a not very nice part of London back to the country town I grew up.

We are fortunate that we made enough on our little house here to afford a nice house and enough to cover the moving expenses.

My DC's are 2 and 6 months so I was really worried about moving as DH and I don't get any help.

So to make life easier I've booked the movers to pack us and i have cleaners booked to deep clean both houses.

We are staying in a hotel the night we move so that the cleaners can get into the new house easily and then our belongings are coming the next day.

My mum thinks this is outrageous and suggested that now I'm moving to a nice house I think I'm too good to do these jobs myself.

I think that's a bit unfair - there will be still be lots of work for us to do. aibu to spend our profits to make life a bit easier for the move?

OP posts:

Piemernator · 31/07/2016 09:44

My cleaner came every week when I wasn't working and had just one teen at home. I hate cleaning, sadly she changed jobs and I haven't replaced her. As long as a cleaner is paid a decent wage and treated with respect what's the bloody problem.

We had packers the last time we moved, DH had a relocation allowance of 3k and we only moved 50 miles so it paid solicitors fees as well.

Original poster

facepalming · 31/07/2016 09:45

Haha SM40 we are well stocked on tea and biscuits! DH has already planned to run for bacon sarnies for us all (movers and cleaner included!)

OP posts:

AppleJac · 31/07/2016 09:49

I hate this kind of behaviour from people.

I would do what you are doing no problem. I already pay people to do things for me now on a regular basis. Im a SAHM. Well tecnically i co own dh business so i do get a wage but i only work 4 hours a month for it so i have lots of free time. I have one dd who is 3 who goes to nursery 2 full days a week. I have.....

Car valeters coming to the house once every 3 weeks.
A window cleaner
A gardner
A domestic cleaner
A lady how picks up and drops my bedding off for ironing

Of course i get snide remarks. I hate it but at the end of the day you pay for what makes life easier. I ve started to avoid my family now due to their remarks and put downs. Nip this in the bud now before it gets out of hand. I wish i had nipped it in the bud earlier instead of isolating myself away from people.

Original poster

facepalming · 31/07/2016 10:12

appleJac congratulations on having a successful business! You and DH must have had a lot of hard work and sleepness nights to make it work so enjoy the benefits!

OP posts:

KittensandKnitting · 31/07/2016 10:17

Apple that's really sad about your family.

I think most people would outsource these things if they wanted to do and could. My mum never had much at all raised us single handely and I'm so lucky she has the attitude of "I bloody would have done it"

Running your own business comes with a world of different stress and strain!

Blu · 31/07/2016 10:19

Last but one time we moved house a childminder took 2 yo DS and my Mum came and cleaned behind the removal team as they emptied each room. If you don't have that kind of help, you buy it in, if possible. Why would anyone make life harder than necessary for the sake of it?

DropZoneOne · 31/07/2016 10:26

That sounds fantastic, nothing wrong with it imo.

We didn't have children when we last moved so had time and space to pack and clean the flat we moved from, and the owners of the house we moved to were lovely and the house was spotless. But if you have the money to relieve part of the moving stress, why wouldn't you do it?

22esmeweatherwax · 31/07/2016 10:26

Completely agree that you are being very sensible and not unreasonable at all. I would do exactly the same. I work part time but still have a cleaner, a gardener and send out bedding to the laundry to be washed and ironed. I can afford all these things without leaving my family short and it means that when I am home with the 2 DC I can do things with them and pay them attention and not have to spend my time running about madly doing jobs to keep the house in good shape. You want help and you pay for professionals, very sensible. Your mother is either jealous or just way out of touch.

PedantPending · 31/07/2016 10:27

Perfectly sensible and practical from a time and resources management point of view.
I would just ignore your mother's remarks and concentrate on moving to your lovely new house.
One word of caution regarding packers and movers, ensure things to be packed are in the same room for departure as for arrival, that boxes are well labelled in an easily-understood way and be aware that a pair of shoes can get separated in the packing process, even if they were together at point of packing. It took me 18 months to reunite a pair on our last move!

Original poster

facepalming · 31/07/2016 10:48

Good advice pedant! maybe I'll put an elastic band or similae around the pairs we use a lot!

OP posts:

EarthboundMisfit · 31/07/2016 10:48

Some of the best money you'll ever spend in my view. We usually do it ourselves, but once my husband's work paid. I was 7 months pregnant with twins. It was wonderful!

wobblywonderwoman · 31/07/2016 10:52

apple I would love to sleep in bed ironed for me. It just shows your success and you deserve it.

I isolate myself from people who criticise me. I know people probably think I am just very odd. But I hate confrontation. They often don't know why I pull away.

AppleJac · 31/07/2016 10:59

I wish you lot were my family!

Your right in that the business is very very time consuming for dh which means we rarely get to go out alot as a couple but people dont look at it that way.

Dh and i get woken every night due to the nature of the business but no one sees that side of it. People dont realise how much hard work has gone into the business, they just think we are up our own arses! Yes i have actually had someone say that to me!

TheRealKimmySchmidt63 · 31/07/2016 15:10

YANBU
Perfectly sensible - moving house is one of the most stressful things- a little help with the physical side of things does not reduce the mental stress

SueDunome · 31/07/2016 15:31

Belongings packed by removal company are insured, packed by you are not.

GinIsIn · 31/07/2016 15:38

We are moving in 4 weeks. I am pg with DC1. We will absolutely be getting in a decorator, cleaners and packers!! I think it's pretty much a necessity if you can afford it. Enjoy it and tell your mum to sod off!

gamerchick · 31/07/2016 15:43

Sounds like a damned fine idea to me. Moving is stressful and why not take away a chunk of it? Ignore the negativity.

RuskBaby · 31/07/2016 15:43

When we moved into our house, we were shocked at how dirty it was! Filth in the kitchen cupboards meant they hadn't been cleaned in a long time! It took 4 of us all day to clean and then still was not clean enough to put out stuff away. If we ever move again, first thing I will do is book the cleaners! Will also go for removal firm to pack and move us. It's something we will build into the cost, it's your money to spend as you wish and make your life easier!

TinklyLittleLaugh · 31/07/2016 15:52

I moved at six months pregnant with 3 children. We had no family help, various elderly relatives stood around tutting. The packers we paid for were rubbish though, we did most of it ourselves. I did so much I totally exhausted myself and felt terrible for the rest of my pregnancy. FiL accused me of neglecting his grandchildren too but that's another story.

WutheringTights · 31/07/2016 16:07

We had packers for our last move and they did a great job. I did hide the nappy bin though in case they decided to pack that. They got their own back by packing all the recycling! 😂

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