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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be gutted that I won't be getting tax credits for 3rd child?

877 replies

GutenTag · 30/07/2016 07:24

I'm just wondering what people's opinion is really.

We are trying for a 3rd child and I won't be getting any tax credits for this child as the government has changed the rules so that from next year tax credits are only paid for up to a maximum of 2 children.

I currently receive around £1k of TC for the kids and I would have received £4k for the 3rd if the government hadn't made the changes.

That would have meant an extra £250 a month. It's a lot of money for us. My DH works and I'm a SAHM. We have a £100k mortgage on a small house in a deprived area of town. We get by. We don't have much money left each month and I need to save literally for everything. I'm really really gutted. I really wanted 3 kids and this has meant that I'll be financially alot worse off now.

Of course I don't expect the government to "pay" for my children but it would have really helped, that's all. It would have eased the pressure off.

Just for the record we have never received any other benefits apart from JSA when DH was made redundant last year which was a godsend as we would have been homeless otherwise.

Do you think AiBU to feel/ think like this?

OP posts:

Deckthehallswithjammydodgers · 30/07/2016 08:57

How about a part time job working evenings and weekends that's what i do because we aren't entitled to any tax credits so means we don't have to pay childcare.

justtowarm · 30/07/2016 08:57

I don't think you are being unreasonable, research shows that the population of societies with more evenly distributed wealth are more prosperous in many ways (you know health of the nation, productive work force, less crime, less teen pregnancy and so on). We are one of the wealthiest countries and also one of the most unequal.

You feel sad as you can't afford a third child yet there are people and companies in this country who are so wealthy they don't know how much money they have and don't know what it feels like to be deprived of something as basic as the family they wanted (all the people who are saying they work hard and can't afford the family they wanted, you should feel cheated to). Not all wealthy people and companies avoid tax I should add so this isn't about slating extremely wealthy, but these people and companies that do often pay someone to help them avoid paying the tax they owe. If it helps you feel better these people also suffer more illness in these unequal societies........ it's probably deep seated guilt and even that's not fair on those who honestly pay their tax.

Anyway preachy rant over

blueskyinmarch · 30/07/2016 08:58

I f you can’t afford a third child why are you even trying to conceive? Just be content with what you have and can afford.

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 30/07/2016 08:59

The OP clearly isn't coming back....

Horehound · 30/07/2016 09:01

I'm not having kids until I can afford them. Hate the mentality that government (aka the working public) should fund your kids.

Lovelyname · 30/07/2016 09:01

Yabu, i would love 3 dc but can't afford it.
Makes perfect sense that this rule is coming in next year.

MoonriseKingdom · 30/07/2016 09:02

I really wouldn't make any long term plans that rely on tax credits. The Conservatives will be in for at least the next few years and there may well be more cutbacks. Particularly given the economic uncertainty following the Brexit vote. Also read up and consider how Universal Credit would effect you as they are still planning to eventually roll it out everywhere.

hidingwithwine · 30/07/2016 09:02

It's a wind up or journalist

I'd have loved 4 or 5 kids. We couldn't afford them. We didn't have them. We both work to afford the 3 we do have. It took over 5 years before we were able to think about ttc dc3 as we needed to save and make plans. We've never had tax credits...ever...

Should I change my username into something profane before the Daily Fail prints this thread?

elodie2000 · 30/07/2016 09:02

rainchancer

kurlique · 30/07/2016 09:03

why do people have this sense of entitlement nowadays? Sorry to be all Matthew Wright but why should the state (I.e.all other tax payers) fund you having another child because you want one? I am sure there are many families out there who would like more children but we don't have them because we can't offer them the lifestyle we want to offer them if there are more of them. We have 2 kids because that's all we can afford. If you want another kid you either have to find another income stream or cut the quality of life that you and your current children enjoy now. The number of times I have heard people defending the rights of people to continue procreating whilst expecting the state (ie the rest of us) to totally fund the entire family drives me mad, why do they have the right? if we all did this the state would be on its knees!

SweetPeaPods · 30/07/2016 09:04

I work full time. Dh too. Both professional jobs. We would love a third but we can't afford it. My work only offers the basic maternity package so I cannot afford the time off work. I would say you are lucky being able to afford to be a sahm, I would love to. after child care from my 40k salary I only come out with around £500 p/m but we wouldn't have food on the table if I didn't work

Lucy90 · 30/07/2016 09:06

OP do you work for the Wright stuff? I'm expecting to see this as a topic on Monday morning

Wdigin2this · 30/07/2016 09:08

Difficult one, and in most cases I would say, don't have children you can't afford without benefits of any kind.....and yes sorry, but I'm saying it to you!

Wdigin2this · 30/07/2016 09:10

Kurlique sorry to have to say it to someone who wants another child, but you've hit the nail on the head!

manicinsomniac · 30/07/2016 09:11

I don't understand - why do you get £1000 for 2 children but would, under the old system, have got £4000 for a 3rd child? Why wouldn't it be another £500?

bloodymaria · 30/07/2016 09:14

OP: lights touch paper, runs.

Colchestergal · 30/07/2016 09:15

First your favourite porridge bowl is broken, now you can't afford a third child.

It's a revised version of the Three Bears.

Boring!!!!!!

Amelie10 · 30/07/2016 09:16

This is obviously a windup but the frustrating thing is that there is so many people who possess this mentality. I'm glad cuts are being made, it's about time people become responsible for their own choices. Bloody entitled to think others should sponsor your lifestyle. Being a sahp is a luxury not a right.

Grassgreendashhabi · 30/07/2016 09:20

I do feel entitled to tax credits myself

I worked for 25 years so has husband. And now I get some of the tax that I paid for all those years back.

However, I do not rely on them if they stopped then so be it. But in the meantime why should you not get them

I'm not justifying the OP as think this is a crock... I'm justifying the entitled too comments

bearleftmonkeyright · 30/07/2016 09:21

I'm going to leave this here. I have three dc. I was working full time after my first and when pregnant with second I left full time work and was a sahm. At this point tax credits were introduced. The line, pick it up, it's yours was used to encourage people to claim. It meant I could be a sahm, but I also worked part time in the evenings in an off licence.. When I had my third the off licence closed down and I couldn't find part time work. But at that point my tax credits were slashed. I undoubtedly benefited greatly from tax credits and it meant I was able to have the family we wanted. I really don't think it's fair to chastise the op for wanting a third child. We have lived very frugally as a family but they have had a roof over their heads, swimming lessons, cubs etc. But the narrative has changed completely IMO. I feel extremely lucky I have three dc and I have brought them up in a household in which they have two parents who do the very best for them. I now work. But it would have been very, very difficult without tax credits.

Dontyoulovecalpol · 30/07/2016 09:23

Grass green tax isn't something you pay to claim back part of at a later date. What a strange attitude

Chippednailvarnishing · 30/07/2016 09:24

But it would have been very, very difficult without tax credits

But when did that become the UK tax payers' problem. You breed them, you feed them. I want my taxes to support the sick, disabled and to provide a safety net for short term hardship.

Amelie10 · 30/07/2016 09:24

I worked for 25 years so has husband. And now I get some of the tax that I paid for all those years back.

You have contributed fair enough. Do you really think that the majority have made such a contribution. No, just read the countless threads on here where people immediately become sahp /m without financially securing themselves first. Because it's a mentality.

TutanKaDashian · 30/07/2016 09:24

Good. It's not the government's problem if you choose to have a large family. Why should they pay?

trafalgargal · 30/07/2016 09:33

I agree it's going to be interesting to see if the incidence of third child births falls.
My parents were one of six and seven respectively, they had two children as that was what they could afford to give a nice life style to, had they had another all three children would have had less. It never seemed an unreasonable stance to me or my brother and both of us had small families ourselves.some of my aunts and uncles had six kids but all of their kids opted for smaller families they could afford to give more to both in terms of money and individual attention.

I think it's really odd that the government has had to financially sanction larger than you can afford families as people were either to stupid or too selfish to work it out for themselves. Are we really a nation of either dimwits or have we become completely selfish?

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