To think this 'nut free policy' is OTT for a school

[MerryMarigold]

So, letter home about next term's 'nut free' policy and I think it's a bit extreme but tell me what you think. In packed lunches (I will have 3 having packed lunch next year), we are not allowed to include:

• Fruit and cereal bars which contain nuts
• Sesame seed rolls
• Nutella
• Peanut butter
• Cakes made with nuts
• Muesli bars
• Baklava/ Nougat/ Turkish Delight
• Any packets of nuts

I would assume we are not allowed to give them pistachios in a Tupperware box either.

Anyway, my point is that how can they police it this closely? I know some kids cannot come into ANY contact with nuts, but for example, my kids would have nuts in granola at breakfast and probably not always wash their hands before school (if they remembered to clean their teeth when they first get up). I also refuse to check the ingredient list of everything I put into a packed lunch for 3 children so there are bound to be nuts in something they end up having.

Nuts are very healthy and nutritious, so we basically need to swap nut based products for something less healthy. I am most upset about the Muesli bars and no cakes made with nuts. Ds1 is a major food-refuser. He has never managed school dinners and food at home is an issue too. He nearly always has a muesli bar in his lunch, which I suppose I will need to substitute with biscuits. And sometimes I would include cakes made with nuts just to up his nutrition at lunchtime a bit. He doesn't like any form of meat, fish or cheese in his sandwiches.

I do sympathise that there are (a very few) people who have a 'life threatening reaction to nut products' (quoted on the 'nut free policy' letter). However, I would assume they do carry an epi-pen as it is impossible to create a completely nut free environment in a large school of children who are eating nuts at least at home. So, in reality it is not life threatening unless there is a child who has an unknown severe nut allergy. I would even be compassionate if it was stated that a child (without mentioning names) had had a reaction several times in school, but I very much doubt a child has reacted at school, and there may not even be a child with a severe nut allergy, so this is just scare mongering really.

SO, I do need to feel more positive about this and the extra work it will cause me, the extra moaning from my child and the reduction in nutrition. Please tell me off gently! I've had a bad night with not much sleep though, so please bear with me.

Sounds as though there's a child starting with a very severe reaction. Not at all unreasonable of the school in that case.

Try making muesli bars without nuts, seems to be only sesame seeds which are problematic, so try sunflower seeds, chia, or similar to up his protein without the buts maybe? Similar texture and reasonably similar taste I'd've thought.

You could try baking with coconut flour or quinoa rather than adding nuts for high protein cakes too.

And if he absolutely must have a pot of pistachios, then I'd suggesting giving them to him on his walk home; 2 hours after lunch probably won't make a huge difference in his overall nutrition levels.

That specific a nut ban suggests a child with a life threatening allergy. It probably wouldn't hurt to get your children into the habit of hand washing after a nutty breakfast if you're worried.

I know it's difficult catering to a child who struggles to eat a balanced diet. I hope you can find foods which are acceptable to you and to him. But watching your child in anaphylaxis does trump worries over restricted nutrition for one meal each day.

Its not unreasonable or unusual. One child in my DS class at primary carried a mini suitcase crash kit he was so allergic to stuff - and that not only included traces of nuts, but particulates in the air (ie a child next to him was eating nuts or a nut based product) and if someone touched something with nuts in and then touched him.

So perfectly normal and reasonable.

Is there a reason why many schools are nut-free but don't cater for other allergies (eg dairy) in the same way?

Not sharing food is something that is enforced from Reception. If schools can stop dairy-free/gluten-free, Muslim, vegetarians.... from eating food that they can't have, why not nuts?

The other thing is, people who have really serious allergies don't even have to eat the allergen to cause a reaction - a friend of mine cannot be in the same room as someone eating a peanut butter sandwich, its that bad.

YABU. Epi pens don't stop the reaction, they just delay it long enough for the user to be able to get proper medical attention. They are meant to be used sparingly as a last resort.

What if it was your child with a sever nut allergy? Wouldn't you want the school to do what they can to keep them safe?

Just give nut products at home if you're so worried about nutrition. There are plenty of nut free lunchbox options available even for the fussiest of children.

I had a severe allergic reaction at school in the 80s because someone was eating salted peanuts in the same room as me. My face swelled up, my throat closed, I couldn't breathe and I was taken to hospital, where I was kept in overnight.

Those who are badly allergic don't have to eat the nuts themselves to be seriously affected. If I'd actually eaten that peanut I'd have died in the school canteen that day.

It was fucking terrifying and I'm glad the issue is taken more seriously these days.

So YABU OP, but I get why you might find it annoying. It is, however, very easy to make healthy meals without nuts. We eat very healthily in our house and are nut-free (to DH's dismay - he was previously a salted peanut fan, apparently!)

What's a pain in the arse to you really could be life or death to others. It's not as simple as just telling allergic children not to eat nuts. Especially at primary age.

I assumed that was pretty normal for all primary schools that have a child with a nut allergy. It's annoying in that my ds loves nuts and they are only one of the healthy snacks he likes, I also do quite a bit of baking with nuts and find it hard to find snacky things that don't contain nuts. So he ends up eating a lot of carbs at school.

You can give your dc nuts at breakfast and in the evening. Am sure their nutrition won't suffer!

Our lower school has the same policy - but not secondary schools! Is a bit OTT - UNLESS they have a known child with life-threatening nut allergies, of course.

But there really are lots of nut-free options out there... My dc like seed shots. And surely some muesli bars are nut-free.

I have anaphylactic shock with blue cheese and other items containing penicillin mould due to a severe allergy to penicillin.

I agree strongly with the poster upthread who said that you have to assume that all food out has the potential to have this in. so in my case I avoid quiches, cheese sauce, cheeseboards on buffets etc. I also have a very acute sense of smell around blue cheese as sniffing it makes my lips and face tingle so haven't been caught out for years (touch wood)

However, I am an adult and have had to learn to be cautious. when I was at school a long time ago blue cheese was considered a bit of a luxury type ingredient so wasn't so much of an issue and easy to avoid (except the stilton at Christmas time thing)

a 4 year old cant be told not to nibble a bit of someone elses lunch. if the school really wanted to keep the child safe then they would put them in a separate room for lunch time. my kids school did this. there were about 6 kids all sat in a classroom happily eating together and no risk and no need to ban others. when dealing with a toxicity you either remove the source or the receiver. I believe in removing the source otherwise the child will grow up thinking that everyone is always aware and will happily eat from their pack lunches.

I also think it is an awful lot to expect all parents to look at every single item and decide. somethings aren't that brilliantly labelled. IMO this policy is more likely to cause the allergic child a problem.

My DS doesn't have a nut allergy, but is immune-compromised and every child at his school has been given a letter about staying home when they are sick and the need to inform the school if they get chicken pox etc. It is horrible to have to rely on other parents taking your child's health seriously enough to have to change their behaviour a bit. Yes, although kids should be kept home for 48 hours after vomiting, not everyone does that. I appreciate its an inconvenience for some that they probably won't bother with, but it risks my child's life. I don't want to have to rely on other people doing stuff, but like the possible child at your school, we have no choice. It's far less disruptive for you than it is for them. Yabu.

They can't stop every incidence of sharing/touching - you're relying on 4 and 5 year olds never making a mistake! So it's sensible to minimise the exposure just in case.

I cannot imagine the stress of worrying about a small child and a severe allergy, when you have to rely on others to care for them. I would happily do anything to help reduce the stress and risk for a parent in that situation. It's a small adjustment, really. Your child can have nuts everyday if you like, just after school. How is it such a horrendous thing to ask parents to do?

I thought that the recommendations were for awareness rather than banning now? This seems to explain it quite well: Allergy UK

YABVU
My DDs secondary is a nut free school and my immediate thought when reading the letter was a child with a life threatening allergy.

eyebrows maybe because a child won't die if it's exposed to dairy? Nuts are completely different to any other allergy in that sense.

Make your own nut free granola type bar? Seriously your child won't die because he doesn't eat nuts at lunch time another child might

Our school has a nut free policy which is very similar - I moaned about it too but stuck to it. I subsequently (about 2 years later!) discovered that a member of staff (working in DS's class) has a nut allergy.

I assume the school don;t want to "name and shame" and his medical information is none of our business anyway. I don't know why schools don't have the same approach to other allergens but maybe a serious nut allergy is more common than other serious allergies (I mean life threatening).

You do get used to it - it was one of the reasons we switched to school lunches!

Pistachio Turkish delights (or ones that come from a mixed boxes and have touched the pistachio?)

I would not expect flapjacks to contain nuts. That sounds like something you thought but they may not.

Or they didn't ask for flapjacks with nuts so weren't saying that's ok

Our school has always had a nut free policy, with various allergies across the school.

There are some muesli-type bars (especially I am thinking of the Nature Valley range) which are nut-free. You could still use the ones you already use at home or out and about outside of school.

Just make cakes for school with no nuts.

Make a smoothie for breakfast which has fresh/frozen berries and fruits, natural yoghurt, apple juice, oats (handful of uncooked porridge), mixed seeds and a teaspoon of almond butter. Great burst of nutrition to see them through.

I have a DD who needs "hot food" lunches, where we have no school dinners and all lunches must be sent in. She HATES sandwiches. So she has a food flask and the contents change periodically - things like chicken goujons, mini spring rolls, pasta, potato wedges, etc. Sometimes she will accept things like crackers with some cheese to assemble herself. Or finger foods like cherry tomatoes, carrot sticks, pepper sticks, sometimes some hummus (which is allowed in school), breadsticks, olives etc. Would a hard boiled egg work? Or a slice of quiche?

We suffer in having a healthy food policy as well, and need to get fats into DD but are not allowed crisps, chocolate or baking (whether HM or bought) as a general thing. DD is very underweight but we manage to get enough into her. We also end up giving her things like tuna melts or scrambled eggs or sausages for breakfast as often as we can - just to give her the nutrition. And a LARGE glass of milk going to bed at night even still.

This week at sailing camp, she is having John West steamed tuna pots - couscous with tuna, using a flask of hot water (she's moved up to 11-14 age group so they are allowed a little more responsibility about things like that - no way could she have it in 7-10 years as too many small boisterous 7yr olds). I suspect she will have something similar once back at school some days.

It's possible to get a child well fed even when their needs seem to clash with those of others.

Not everyone has to eat the food to have a reaction some people with nut allergys can react if in the same room as food containing nuts.

At university we had a total ban on cities ingredients and drinks In halls and lecture theatres. It wasn't over the top as the individual concerned could die from the reaction. That didn't stop it being a pita but we all got on with it with more grace and sympathy than shown here.

Not OTT at all when a child's life is at stake.

Bear in mind op, that if your child had a life threatening allergy, they would do the same for your family.

I disagree that the school should tell you why the policy has been put in place. Do they tell you why they have a uniform, or why they don't want crazy hair?

Citrus, damn auto correct

This is pretty standard here. We are a "nut free school" and parents are regularly reminded not to send in cereal bars, Nutella and things like homemade coffee and walnut cake. It's really not a biggie. Products marked "may contain traces of..." are OK, just not nut based things. It's not difficult to create nut free lunches and there are lots of cereal bars and yoghurt on the market which are fine to send in.

Nobody is saying anyone's children can't continue to enjoy their peanut butter on toast or tracker bars as a snack. Just not at school.

Heaven forbid you lose a child to anaphalytic Shock then your viewpoint might be more understanding

Speaking as someone with a nut allergy (I'm 29 and have had allergy my whole life), I know it was not your intention but your post comes across as very dismissive and selfish. It may be slightly more effort to read a few ingredients labels (baring in mind allergy sufferers have to read the labels of EVERYTHING they eat) but it could stop another child from being seriously ill or even die. Things like peanut butter can very easily make there way onto little hands which then go on bannisters/tables/other children. Another child with allergy touches this then puts hands in their mouth.
Child eats nuts at lunch and shares drink with nut allergy child (thinking it's ok because they haven't shared food). This is enough to cause a reaction (it has happened to me many times).
Children that age are not always old enough to check their own ingredients so if food is shared it could be fatal for a child with nut allergy. Older children can read and understand this themselves but I applaud your schools attitude. I remember when I was at primary school we had school dinners, for dessert one day it was a cookie (written on the board as just 'cookie'). Turned out it was a peanut butter cookie which because apparent after I projectile vomited all over the school canteen.
So yeah sorry I think YABU and you just need to suck it up, it's really not that hard to not give your children nuts for lunch just be grateful none of them have a nut allergy.