To not want him in my garden

[BillyNotQuiteNoMates]

I have a neighbour, (not next door, but opposite and down the road) who I know has some special needs. He lives alone, so obviously reasonably capable, and a job. I don't know what "label" his special needs would have. Just to put you in the picture.
He has a cat. His cat likes wandering. He likes to knwk where his cat is. This involves crawling around under the garden bushes (in my garden), under the trampoline, trying to get under my sons car (which if he scratches it, my son will kill him, as it's his pride and joy), walking down the side of my house as if it's a public right of way and looking in through my windows. (We have a gate, which is kept shut, at front and back, which he just opens and walks in) I frequently have friends children here to play. AIBU to not want him to just wander in my garden, and if so, how do I go about stopping him. I've asked nicely, and pointed out that it's my garden and that it isn't public property.

The police recognize this behaviour as one of the early steps in sexual misconduct. He's looking for his fucking cat! What on earth are you talking about? God I just give up sometimes.

When looking for a cat in the garden, looking in the window is one of the first steps for looking to see if the cat has gone inside. HTH

Of course we all have sexual feelings

Well I don't...

I really really don't. The whole thing makes me disgusted, the sexual organs of both sexes are horrible to see and the idea of them... interacting in any way is horrible.

intellectual disabilities

Oh you are form the US, that explains the use of these kinds of insulting terms.

Sadly that awful term is being used in the UK now

Tell the police.

My neighbour has an autistic son but who is 'on the spectrum'. Since he's been about 10 he was very much into police, RSPCA, collecting money, selling items etc.

Some neighbours were fine about this - some didn't like it as he also had a stall outside the local supermarket and he said he gave the money to the RSPCA.

Anyway he also got me into waiting around and looking for suspicious characters once or twice (his mum works all day on a Saturday).

After a while some people (even me) were getting annoyed and also concerned about his safety re the money he collected etc so a police officer did come and talk to him, a sort of warning but also polite talk.

If his mum or anyone else told him off he ignored them so an authority figure he had to listen to.

he's now 17 and at college and much better and respects boundaries much more. He's stopped the door to door RSPCA stuff but helps at a local market or walks dogs for some people.

I have no doubt at all, that he is just looking for his cat. He's no danger to anyone. I just don't want him wandering round my garden at will. It feels invasive.
As some posts have been removed, I can't see what was written, but "handicapped" is an acceptable term in the US although not in the UK. However, making imputations against this man, is not on. He is a vulnerable adult. That's it!

so an authority figure he had to listen to

all people with ASD are different and this does not apply to all.

Fgs. He might look in the windows for several innocent reasons.
A movement or the lit up tv catches his eye.
He's looking for the op in case she tells him off.
He's looking for the op in case she'll help him search.
The cat might have got into the house.

Just ask your community policeman to have a chat with him.

Dixie, it's used in research and some policy development literature. It isn't commonly used yet but sadly I suspect that this is purely a matter of time as there seems to be a sense of that general direction (often it's these things which influence the language that clinicians use).

I would start locking the gate and maybe suggest that he gets a GPS collar for the cat if he is genuinely worried about the cat's location, you can get them for under £15 now.

Also have you contacted social services at all.

I didn't realise that GPS technology had come down in price.

Could you afford to buy the cat a GPS collar as a gift so that you can clearly tell him to check the tracker as he's not allowed in your garden anymore?

I whistle trained my cats for their food - it does make life a lot easier at getting them home/visible when you want to check on them!

fanjo actually it does apply in this case. I think the boy I knew was warned about 'wasting police time' but it was still community police.

In this case if this man won't listen to the OP then community police are a sort of authority figure.

After all if he has a job and lives independently he's able to function in society.

We've had following problems over the years with care in the community and a local residential care home, generally they're fine but sometimes they've been out of line (one was getting drunk and approaching teenage girls and sitting drunk in the street). I assume someone had a word because he's now fine but vulnerable adults etc if they're not aware of social norms need to be reminded sometimes.

you can get them for under £15 now.
I am so sorry I meant £50, I don't know what I typed £15 for.

I didn't realise that GPS technology had come down in price.
They haven't, sorry, my mistake.

No, yanbu

PersianCatLady - I' gutted, was eyeing up my cats thinking I could find out what they get up to all day!

amarmai - have MNHQ emailed you yet about your openly repeated nasty disablist scaremongering?

PersianCatLady - I' gutted, was eyeing up my cats thinking I could find out what they get up to all day!
I'm sorry.

I would be well interested to know if I had a cat that left our home and garden so I can see why you are a bit gutted.

GPS would be useful for the Persian though as she is always only about 20m away from me and she would never dream of leaving the garden.

I've been thinking about this and wondering if there's a different approach.
Am presuming it's an adult cat OP? do you know how long he's had it for?

He seems to be anxious about where the cat is when he's home and the cat's out, or if he has to go to work and doesn't know where the cat is. It can take some getting used to that a cat is independent and will wander if it wants to, unlike other pets.

Does he have a cat flap? does his cat have a magnetic collar to operate the cat flap specifically for him/her and also, importantly, has he had the cat neutered and microchipped?

Maybe someone could talk to him about issues like these and he could then become more relaxed about where the cat is instead of going out calling and searching for it?

I meant NOT for the Persian.