to think I'm not a bad parent because my child hasn't learnt to swim?

[purplefan5]

DS is 7, he doesn't know how to swim and he is still in armbands, is this really so bad? I seem to get the worst looks when we go swimming, etc.

Is it really that bad? He doesn't want to do swimming lessons.. Are you supposed to force them?

[bigbuttons]

OP your child should learn how to swim for their own safety.

[GreatFuckability]

Of course it doesn't make you a bad parent. My children can swim a bit, but none are strong swimmers. I cant afford lessons and taking 3 small kids swimming alone isn't possible. Really. Its not a huge deal.

[Dutchcourage]

byandtheby yes there are lots. If you go to most desent book sites you will find books on aquatic strokes and also games that encourage learning through play

[BertrandRussell]

"OP your child should learn how to swim for their own safety."

Why?

[JacquesHammer]

My DD is only JUST getting the hang of swimming at almost 10.

She has had years of bad eczema and asthma and chlorine just made her so bloody uncomfortable it wasn't worth the trade off in terms of forcing her to go and leaving her with massive sores

[ReallyTired]

My son learnt to swim at seven years old very quickly. He had ent problems that stopped him from having lessons at a younger age. It is the summer holiday and there are crash courses for non swimmers. A seven year old with half a brain will pick it up quickly.

Swimming lessons are not a waste of money. My children just wanted to play when I took them swimming. Parent don't make the best of teachers.

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Bertrand, seriously?

As they get older, we afford our children more independence. That means them being places, without us.

Swimming is a skill that means should they find themselves in or near water with friends, they know what the hell to do if horseplay gets out of hand and they find themselves in water.

[Toxicity]

You are not a bad parent at all.

As some PPs have said, some one to one lessons with an understanding swimming teacher could do the trick, I am sure they would take things at his pace and not force him to do anything he didn't want to. He goes in the water now so he must enjoy the experience of being in the pool to some extent so definitely capitalise on that.

Good luck!

[EarthboundMisfit]

I don't think it's unreasonable not to be able to swim at 7, but I do think swimming lessons would be the way to build confidence. They are used to very nervous children.

[Sallystyle]

I haven't found it an essential life skill for me at all.

I am 35 and it has not affected my life at all. I am a crap swimmer, I can swim for a few minutes but very badly.

Two of mine are good swimmers, three of them are pretty bloody bad. They had lessons at school but I never took them to lessons.

Us bad swimmers are all aware of our limitations and how to be safe near water, not that any of us spends much time in water except for the bath.

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Ensuring your child can swim is equipping them with a life skill. Who knows if it will ever come in handy, but it's the kind of skill that without it, could quite possibly result in death. So in terms of skills, I would describe as fairly critical.

[BertrandRussell]

"Swimming is a skill that means should they find themselves in or near water with friends, they know what the hell to do if horseplay gets out of hand and they find themselves in water."

What- at the age of 7??

[Enjoyingthepeace]

No, of course not. bloody hell, it's hard sometimes having a debate on mumsnet. Gets derailed by posters asking silly questions

[Okkitokkiunga]

OP sorry if missed it, but is the pool a shallow teaching pool or a normal big pool. Was just wondering about setting your DS different challenges to build up confidence. Walking to pool and sitting with feet in water to put armbands on, then next week sit on step etc. If his feet can touch ground easily I also second the suggestion of a woggle. But use with armbands for couple weeks then his challenge could be to try for five mins without armbands etc.

I am one of the brigade who insists that my children have to swim but I'm not from UK and for me it is a lifestyle thing as well as a lifeskill. However my son used to cling to me like a limpet so we took our time with him. He can now swim.

It takes time but is so worth it in the end. Good luck

[Enjoyingthepeace]

More than 400 people drown in the UK every year and thousands more suffer near-drowning experiences
One person dies as a result of drowning an average of every 20 hours in the UK and Ireland
Drowning is the third highest cause of death in children in the UK
Drowning claims the lives of almost 400,000 people worldwide per year, with hundreds of thousands more incidences going unrecorded
More than 60 children drown during the summer every year in the UK, yet the majority of these deaths are likely to have been preventable.
Around 85 per cent of accidental drownings occur at open water sites, and many of these occur due to lack of knowledge and understanding of the hazards associated.
It is possible to drown in as little as 5cm of water

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Pulled from the Times

[BertrandRussell]

a) how many of those drownings would have been prevented by being able to swim a length in a swimming costume in a warm pool?
b) How many happened because either the child or the parent was overconfident because "Oh, he's fine, he can swim"?

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Over and out. Good luck to your children Bertrand

[BertrandRussell]

So you can't answer the questions? Thought not.

[noisyrice]

Sorry to say this, but I think you will think yourself a bad parent if your child was unable to swim or keep afloat and drowned, due to you not enforcing swimming as a vital life and survival skill.

[CatNip2]

I found when my 2 were little that those that couldn't swim when school lessons started were the ones that were always flailing about in the water throughout the next few years and never became confident swimmers. If you can afford it then make the effort before it's too late.

Most kids seemed to start swimming lessons that I knew around 5, Ducklings I think they called it, council lessons nothing private or too expensive.

[BertrandRussell]

It's not a life skill. It is if you live in particular circumstances, but for most people it isn't. It's just q money spinner for swimming schools!

[BertrandRussell]

"Sorry to say this, but I think you will think yourself a bad parent if your child was unable to swim or keep afloat and drowned, due to you not enforcing swimming as a vital life and survival skill."

Tell me how this would happen.