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AIBU?

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Original poster

To go on holiday without DS and not tell him about it...

63 replies

longer6528 · 11/07/2016 10:29

DS is 11. He is doing a sports camp in the summer holidays, where they stay there for the week (sleep there and everything) as its intense training for tennis.

Anyway, we have found a nice holiday that we fancy. Would it be really bad if we went without him and just never told him? He'd know no difference, as he wouldn't have been here anyway!

OP posts:
Lweji · 11/07/2016 10:30

So, you'd have to lie about any photos he could find and make sure you never mention the holiday in conversation?

Think about it.

ingeniousidiot · 11/07/2016 10:31

YANBU taking a holiday, but YABVVU to keep it a secret. Why would you do that?

BarbarianMum · 11/07/2016 10:31

Why do you need to lie?

EatShitDerek · 11/07/2016 10:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TealLove · 11/07/2016 10:32

Just be honest with him. You are parents but you are human beings with a life and I'm sure he'll understand.

blueskyinmarch · 11/07/2016 10:33

Don't lie to him, just tell him.

HallowedMimic · 11/07/2016 10:33

Seriously? You'd never ever mention the trip in front of him, or allude to anything that happened there?

How odd.

I'd just tell him you were going away that week too, I don't suppose he'll mind. My children are quite used to us all making arrangements for time spent apart.

As long as you have an emergency contact who can deal with problems at the camp/summer school it will be fine.

He is your child, not a sibling you are jealous of and need to hide things from with plotting and scheming and secrets. Confused

Original poster
longer6528 · 11/07/2016 10:33

But he'll want to come and I'd feel bad Sad he'd be upset about it

OP posts:
Lweji · 11/07/2016 10:35

So, you are prepared to lie to your child?

He will find out you went and that you lied. Great job.

TheFairyCaravan · 11/07/2016 10:35

But he'll want to come and I'd feel bad sad he'd be upset about it

So there's your answer right there. You'd be very, very unreasonable to lie.

Who is going on the holiday?

whatsagoodusername · 11/07/2016 10:36

We did this a bit by accident with our DC, but they are 4 and 5. They went to a caravan holiday with granny and cousins because we were having a weekend away. We spent the entire time leading up to it bigging up their holiday that we never actually mentioned our own.

We got in the car after dropping them off and headed to the airport. Got halfway there and realised we hadn't told them we were going.

They didn't notice. But I'm not sure you could do it at 11.

LindyHemming · 11/07/2016 10:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OptimisticSix · 11/07/2016 10:38

So if you're going with you partner Telkom DS it's a grown up holiday and you and DP with be holding hands and kissing at every opportunity. That would but enough to make my 11 year old roll his eyes, tell me I'm disgusting and leave the room... don't think he'll want to come then :D

MoggieMaeEverso · 11/07/2016 10:38

Huh? Just tell him! If he complains, tell him he's getting a nice tennis holiday and you're not getting one of those, so you're quits!

OptimisticSix · 11/07/2016 10:39

*tell not Telkom... my autocorrect is ridiculous!

Whathaveilost · 11/07/2016 10:39

I've been going away like this for years. DS is now 17 but has been playing hockey since he was 9. Every year he goes on hockey camp and I go away.

When I tell him where I intend to go and he fancies it he puts on a mock rage for laughs ( no wonder he got A in drama!). When I tell him he could always cancel hickey camp and come he always says ' y'alright mum, I'll stick to camp!' ( it's like a script we go through every year, it's a tradition now!! )

I'm guessing your son is passionate about tennis. If so there shouldn't be an issue.

gamerchick · 11/07/2016 10:40

I don't think I could do that. Accidents happen at camps, I would be thinking how would he feel if he hurt himself and I was off on my jollys. In fact my luck that would probably happen, I get away with nowt!

It'll also be hard to keep it covered up afterwards.

No it's not a good idea.

LIZS · 11/07/2016 10:41

Then go somewhere he wouldn't want to go. Are there any other dc?

DartmoorDoughnut · 11/07/2016 10:43

Just a thought have you put plans in place in case your DS is injured and needs to be collected? If not please do so!

Lweji · 11/07/2016 10:44

Sometimes I have to travel to nice places alone for work. DS (also 11) would like to go, but I just tell him that he has plenty of time to travel during his life time. At his age I had never even left the country.
It's fine to do different things and go to separate places.

BathshebaDarkstone · 11/07/2016 10:46

What pps said.

Thelyingbitchandthewardrobe · 11/07/2016 10:47

How are you going to explain your sun tan?

Imagine he gets a tummy bug and has to be collected early. He'd be gutted if the coach had to tell him 'your grans coming to get you because your mum can't get back from majorca' or something!

You've got to tell him.

CakeNinja · 11/07/2016 10:49

But he'll want to come and I'd feel bad Sad he'd be upset about it

Well he can't have everything can he? Confused Sorry, you haven't posted much info but from this it sounds as though he's a bit spoilt. So what, he misses out, it's not because he's being forced to stay home alone, it's because he's at tennis camp.

Did he get any say in going to summer camp? Was it his choice?

NavyandWhite · 11/07/2016 10:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MoggieMaeEverso · 11/07/2016 10:53

How has he gotten to 11 without you telling him stuff that makes him upset??

My 6 year old tells me I'm the worstest mummy ever ten times a day because I'm being grossly unfair. You can't always get what you wa-aant... Wink

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