to not want to do self-catering holidays every time?

[MotherofPearl]

DP and I have opposing views on this. He has what I regard as an irrational hatred of hotels (says he doesn't like being around 'all the other people in hotels' ). Also says he doesn't like being cramped in with the DC (we have 3). I think interconnected rooms solves the latter problem, and feel quite strongly that self-catering holidays aren't really a break for me! Although we share the cooking, I end up doing most of the other stuff (laundry, making beds, general cleaning up).
I'd just like it if sometimes we could opt for a hotel, and someone else could think of the meals, make the beds, and supply the clean towels! All-inclusive is something I can only dream of! And it's not a money issue; I've asked him about that. So, AIBU to desperately hanker for a hotel holiday?

24 hour not our!

Yanbu but the real problem is you doing most of the work and him not doing his fair share.

I'd rather stay at home than go AI or camping - they're my absolute non-negotiables and hotels only for city breaks

The AI hotels with several a la carte restaurants are usually the very high end ones that are extremely expensive.

The ones that most people can afford usually just have one buffet restaurant which does not make for a relaxing social dining occasion.

I don't mind a buffet breakfast but don't want evening meals from a buffet because I want to go for a wander and drinks before dinner and in hot countries I want to eat outside.

Even if I could afford an AI hotel that provides the dining experience I want I probably wouldn't go for it because I could make better use of the money in local restaurants.

I also don't see the point of paying for AI if you're not going to use it and when most days are spent out sightseeing or at the beach I wouldn't want to be lugging a picnic around in a hot country.

I can see how AI can work if you just want to relax and not do very much and have a lot of money to go to high end places.

But it is also true that an equally fabulous relaxing time can be had when self catering and it doesn't have to be a total drudge fest if you do it right.

Washing up? We only book places with dishwashers

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen if you create dirty dishes then that means you are catering and having to shop.

I refuse to do any of these things on holiday.

We used to do self catering in the middle of nowhere in France that had enough room to play cricket and football and so the boys could fish. This was great until it meant holiday after holiday I would be in the gite on my own whilst they fished and you needed to drive 10 miles for milk etc. Now we stay in villages or towns with amenities within walking distance [if we are doing self catering for our main holiday]. With it now being the two of us as the children are adults, he doesn`t fish but I decide really where we are going [within reason]. Last year we did half board in Lido di Jesolo, so this year is S/C in Aigues Mortes and next year we hope to go back to S/C in Lido again. Mix it up.

I'm thinking more along the lines of loading the dishwasher with mugs from cups of tea tbh. Dh orders a shop before we arrive.

Interesting range of views here on this, and lots of great ideas for compromises too - thanks. DP is being won over to the serviced villa idea. We usually get a cottage somewhere ruralish. Last year we had a lovely cottage in rural Burgundy, but because it was far from anywhere we ate in a lot, and although we did simple meals (lots of bread, cheeses, salads etc), the prep, clearing up, etc did get me down a bit. Having said that we did go out for some lovely long lunches. I guess there's just a very lazy part of me that feels the zero effort of hotels is blissful! This year we have hired a cottage in Devon. I've taken the advice given here and told DP we're eating out at least once a day.
Pearly, I totally agree with all you say: please can I come on holiday with you?

motherofpearl- you are welcome to come.
We are off to Greece on Saturday, a well deserved break for us.

The sum total of housework I do on holiday is stirring my coffee, I like not even having to take away the dirty cup.

Anything requiring effort is fun only- swimming, strolling along a shore.

The crux here is that you don't get a break because you're still doing wifework. Next time say to your DH it's his responsibility and refuse to do anything.

Why not have a villa but eat out more.
I much prefer villas etc to hotels - own space, no room sharing with dd, own pool, no fighting for sun loungers, no dodgy all inc food and drink, etc
But then we don't cook either. We will throw breaks at if ether but usually just have toast, French bread, croissants, maybe eggs, fruit etc. No real cooking and everyone sorts themselves.
Then we eat out for most other meals. Most cooking we might go may be have an alfresco lunch of bread, salad and cold meats/fish / basically supermarket, open pack, serve. Or possibly a BBQ one evening.

And def not doing tons of housework.

Beds - well I don't leave them messy on a hotel either but it's normally just a duvet to throw over a bee. Staying longer than a week most villas sort a change mid stay, same for towels.

Towels I hang up to dry wherever we stay.

I'd only do general cleaning as in picking things up and only properly clean if a dropped something. Dh would be doing same. Minimal. No Hoover and mop etc.

Dishes - only ever hire places with dishwasher

Laundry - take enough clothes to last; I wouldn't pay for hotel laundry anyway. Though I like a washing machine Incase of spills and dh often will take half amount of clothes and through a wash in mid week. Everything dries quickly due to hotter weather. I might sometimes throw towels in to freshen them up but only if hanging about the villa using the pool etc and doesn't eat into day. In machines, press button. Later open and throw over airer outside. Def not hassle.

I never get the hype over AI. Have done it for a week every so often - all 4/5 star and 5star plus. But the food is NEVER as good as what you get when you eat out in the holiday resort restaurants themselves. Neither is the wine.

Someone was asking for suggestions
We nearly booked here for this summer but had to change plans

www.ballena-alegre.com/en/lodgins/bungalows/all/

In my opinion it's not a real holiday if you have to cook. AI is a current dream of mine : no cooking, no cleaning, no tidying, no stacking the endless bloody dishwasher.

BUT self catering with kids can be good, obviously, you can prepare stuff they'll actually eat, and it is cheaper, if money is an issue.

DHs family regularly do big family holidays self catering, and whilst the kids do enjoy it, it's not a break for the adults really. Cooking 3 meals per day, washing up, tidying, etc etc. Not a break. Cheap, but not a break.

hulababy- probably true about the food, and if it was just OH and we wouldn't do AI.

The real strength of AI is when you have young children.
We all love meals out, but often appetites of children can be changed by routine. Adults may not want their main meal at 5pm, but 4 year olds do.
Sometimes they pick at meals only to be hungry again in two hours time.
Missing breakfast and someone may want an early lunch.
Going out to a restaurant is lovely but often not the stress free fine dining occasion that you would like it to be when you have kids in tow- the same applies here in the UK.
Some lovely restaurants abroad, often service is slow, fine if it's two adults sipping ouzo, but not when you have a hungry 4 year old unhappy at having to wait for 30 minutes.
The buffet style of catering at AI resorts suits kids really well, they can see what they are choosing, no waiting around, if they don't like it then fine, choose something else.
Or go back in an hour and have a second hot meal if that's what you want, or just graze with some snacks for an hour or two.
It's the flexibility that I love about AI with kids.

we self-cater but eat out at least once daily, sometimes twice. A lot of villa companies offer a mid-stay housekeeping visit for a light clean and towel change as standard. We find this plenty, but I think you can also book additional housekeeping visits for a fee.

I go self catering whenever possible, I'm always on a budget but still get maid service, towels changed etc, but eat out somewhere different every night wherever I want to.

I'm mumsnetting from all rather nice serviced apartment right now. Maid in every day to clean and a choice of restaurants to eat in.

Mind you when the kids were small we just did caravans and camping and enjoyed ourselves just as much.

"Having to be up and dressed a certain time for breakfast ruins my idea of relaxation far more than washing up a few plates and mugs"
Yes, this is absolutely my most unfavourite part of hotel holidays.
Even with a long window for breakfast it's bloody horrible for me because I just want to drink coffee and maybe eat fruit cake in my PJs while planning the day, but in any kind of hotel I have to shower, dress, brush my hair etc etc and be ready for the day to go for breakfast in a dining room. Then off back to the room to brush teeth etc before heading out for the day.
I fucking hate housework too, so I reckon a serviced appt is the ideal.
Or camping

Hmm. Having read pearlymum's post I now have a plan.
Go AI for all reasons Pearlymum states
Let DH take the DCs for breakfast so I don't have to endure the hell of it but he still gets the massive cooked breakfast he is "entitled to" on holiday
kids happy as pancakes will be available.
Other meals less of an issue for me so all good.

I appreciate that you might be looking for a beach location but these are the best self catering apartments I have ever stayed in (we had a 2 bed, 2 bath) . Hotel standard accommodation with a cleaning service everyday (and views to die for).

We are going on our first AI holiday this summer and I cannot wait! It's something I've wanted to do for years for all of the reasons pearlylum lists. I am very much looking forward to DS being able to have drinks/snacks/whatever without the constant 'Muuuuuummmm can I have.....?' And I'm looking forward to the flexibility of mealtimes.

After a disastrous hotel stay earlier in the year with my dd (who was just 3) I'm self catering until she's left home. She's early to bed and early to rise, by 7pm she wanted bath and bed. Finally asleep at 7:15. Me and dh then sat in the bedroom whispering whilst watching crap free view TV. She then woke at 6am and wanted breakfast, except it wasn't served until 7:30am. She was hell to keep quiet. Never again.
Self catering is in the planning which doesn't bother me. We've booked platinum grade haven caravan for summer. In the car will be a swimming bag ready packed for dd, DSS (who's 18) and dh. As soon as we arrive, dh unloads car and will take the tribe off swimming. I'll unpack in peace and make beds. Then go with w ready prepared shopping list to local supermarket. I reckon rather than dealing with a overexcited pre schooler, mooching round the shop is a piece of cake. :)
I love the space and at least once dd is in bed, we can sit on the decking with wine or watch TV/films at a normal level.