To want to ban primary school sports day?

[namechangingagainagain]

I HATE sports day. I REALLY REALLY hate it!
Don't get me wrong as a child I was sporty. I did well at sports day and loved it.

However now I'm a parent Ive had to drag DS6 to school this morning. I have 3 school age children. They are all competitive but only the eldest is good at sport. He liked sports day. The other 2 found it the most painful day of the year.

Don't get me wrong they can all play a board game and lose without too much bother. They are all active and fit. They just hate sports day..... the sitting around...... the cheering parents...... DS aged 9 said " I hate it when they clap you and you're last.... it's really humiliating....."

It seems once you get to high school it's more opt in... which is fine.
FWIW I'm not anti-competitive at all but it just seems to me when they are little they don't have the emotional intelligence to cope with it ( or maybe it's just my children...)

( and yes I probably just should have let him have the day off in hindsight )

Puzzle solving, chess and a little bit of geo caching in teams might be better than egg and spoon, 100 yard dash and sack races.

If they want to get sweaty they could jump rope or skip. Doing some Star jumps, handstands, hopscotch, cartwheels, tree climbing, juggling and press ups if they're really keen.

I think everyone doing an interpretive dance of the academic year would be fantastic, with miming included. Spontaneous song and rapping from the teaching staff, and limericks from the parents, with a lolly for everyone.

I let my dcs have the day off if they like. Sometimes they want to go in a bit later, to watch their mates have temper tantrums over the three legged race. It's ace.

I don't understand why sporty children only get this one day to shine. My kids did PE twice a week, the sporty kids seemed to shine and probably more than kids who were good at maths or English where success is less visible.

My two sporty kids played in the school football team, the represented the school at swimming and athletics and in all those sports they also represented the district. Plenty of chances to shine.

At senior school they represented the school at rugby, cricket, athletics, swimming and fives. Plenty of chance to shine. At Monday morning assembly the teams would be congratulated on their successes and people who did something particular, scored a goal won a race or whatever, were named. No one had their name read out because they got 100% in a maths test of French vocab.

In a world where kids seem less active and obesity is a problem isn't it time we thought about this a bit more creatively.

Could schools run an activity day where kids could try various activities e.g invite local clubs to send people in to run taster sessions, many would love to do it I am sure as it would be a good recruiting exercise, so you could have ball skills with the local football club, cricket skills, judo, gymnastics and perhaps lets think of things that lots of adults do for fun like line dancing or salsa. Children could book in to a certain number of activities and hopefully the non sporty kids could find something they actually like doing e.g. my DD was hopeless at sport but was a good dancer and I think 3 hrs dancing a week probably meant she was as fit or even fitter than some of the sporty kids.

Can't we do something positive? If some people want sports day do it on a Saturday and make it voluntary, you know like the musical kids who come into school in the evening to perform.

Could schools run an activity day where kids could try various activities e.g invite local clubs to send people in to run taster sessions, many would love to do it I am sure as it would be a good recruiting exercise, so you could have ball skills with the local football club, cricket skills, judo, gymnastics and perhaps lets think of things that lots of adults do for fun like line dancing or salsa. But these things are going on in every primary school in the country.

Some of the schools you describe sound horrific then. I was PE coordinator and none of the exclusivity you talk about happened.

If schools do it well it is fun for all. Not difficult.

How do they know it is fun for all? Does anyone ever really ask? As a parent it's a hard topic to bring up without being dismissed as someone who is just sour that their darling lost, or needs to teach their child to lose gracefully (as some of the reactions on this thread show). If anyone asked my child, they would probably say they enjoyed it, because they are told it is all meant to be fun and at 5 they don't really have the social and emotional maturity to understand why they didn't like it, other than to say they lost. Then when they say they lost, they are just told they are wrong to feel that way, further undermining their confidence.

Fuck me, this thread 🙄🙄🙄

Not every child is good at maths, or English, not every child is good a sport.

A decent school will find that area that your child excels in, and foster it. A bad school is the one that turns a blind eye to all this jeering, patronising, and devastation.

Believe there are hundreds of ways a child 'wins' and 'loses' every day. Things like friendship problems cause much more angst than an annual event which lasts 2/3 hours.

Granny, I am in a bit of a cleft stick here, aren't I? If I say 'no, honestly, anonymous feedback to questionnaires about our sports day repeatedly shows extremely widespread support for it', you will just say that everyone is lying to us, because your experience with a different format in a different school is not the same as ours.

I am not saying that no sports days in any schools are unpleasant for anyone, nor that in some schools no recognition is given for e.g. 100% in maths or French vocab. However, on the flip side, I know that in some schools, sports day is organised in a way that means that it is enjoyed by the vast majority and success in all fields is equally celebrated.

I have sporty children myself, who LOVE sports day and have done so from Reception through to later years in secondary. That doesn't mean that your sporty children didn't like sports day in their schools, of course, but it does mean that the 'even sporty kids hate all sports days, however they are organised' cannot be true - unless my children lie repeatedly to me but your never, ever lie to you?

teacherwith2kids, the format at my kids school sounds pretty well identical to yours. I used to help with running some of it, I have always volunteered at school for various things but in this instance I did it mainly to try and stop some of the bullying directed towards my child as no one watches your child like you do. Children would be moaning and so would the parents. I heard far more who were fed up than were positive but like I said when the Head or teachers appeared everyone smiled and said it was great. The English tend to do this, ever seen anyone moaning about their meal in a restaurant and then the waitress comes over and asks if its OK and they smile and say, "Oh yes, lovely."

The point isn't that some like it and should be allowed to do it and some don't, the point is why do they all have to do it. If the music concert and the end of year play take place out of the school day and you don't have to be involved if you don't want to why is sport different?

It is interesting that any special sport sessions are reserved for the sporty, my idea was to make this open to everyone on a day to replace sports day so that all kids could try somethings on a non competitive basis so they can find things they enjoy and maybe are good at. As an example I know a child who wasn't good at school sport, his dad took up climbing and one weekend took son along. He had a go and loved it and now climbs at county level competitions. He was lucky but how many kids who would love something outside traditional school sport never get the chance. If only some children get a chance to try these things then I think it should be the kids who haven't found a sport they like. I think teachers are being lazy if there is an activity laid on and they just pick the usual suspects, and lets face it that happens alot in schools and I say that as someone who was helping GS learn his lines for the end of year play. He has had the lead role in Christmas and end of year play for the last 4 years, he is also captain of the football team and cricket team, represents the school at athletics. I was in school last week, I volunteer one day a week, and he came past and said hello, he was showing a family round the school and I thought wouldn't it be nice if someone else got chosen just occasionally? He will be getting a book token at the end of term for the "work" he has done all year in showing people round which is lovely but what about the kids who never get picked for anything, like my other grandson.

10 year old me agrees with you. Sitting around in the heat all day, throwing bean bags around and being watched by a bunch of randoms. Hated it.

Granny, obviously my dcs schools seem to be the exceptions according to this thread as the sports clubs and activities are open to all, and done by all (in recent weeks - tennis festival, street surf, zorbing (I did think...wtf??!!) cricket and kayaking.

I helped out with both their sports days, and the sports day at the preschool I work at and honestly most kids enjoy it. But as teacherwith2kids says we are in a no-win situation because you will just say they are all faking it, my dd2 and her friend who held hands with their best friend to help her over the finish line were just patronising her, and the people who clapped my son as he walked over the finish line with his 1-1 were mocking him.

Obviously I get that not all schools are the same and I understand how sen provision varies (I battled long and hard for ds's provision) but surely it is a good thing to aim for sport in school to be a mix of competitive, inclusive, fun and moving about a bit?!

It is interesting that any special sport sessions are reserved for the sporty This just isn't true.

I loved sports day. I was sporty. But I was pretty good academically too. Ds is much more sporty than academic - it's good he has something he can excel in, just like the others in his class who excel at other things. I think children are (or should be) perfectly capable of understanding that they have different strengths, weaknesses, likes and dislikes. This is something we've drummed into ds almost since birth, along with encouraging him to help and be kind to those who need and ask for it. He's 5 and gets it. He's great at running and climbing, others are great at maths or reading and writing. That's life.

I loved sports day. I was sporty. But I was pretty good academically too
Me too LittleLion. I suspect a lot of MN didn't like sport at school. They were perhaps put off by some gung ho PE teachers. It's not so much like that now. I was heavily involved in school sport initiatives. I do know what the situation is but few want to listen since it doesn't suit their agenda.

'Sports day gives those who are only good at sports a chance to shine' (paraphrasing several comments here).

Is that not what P.E. does? Or the sports teams that represent the school?

What grannytomine has said, basically!

I wish there was an ICT day - that's the single, solitary thing my DS would be able to shine at. But no, apparently it's only sporting ability which is important enough to have an extra day dedicated to it.

BeautyQueenFromMars, I am sure in adult life his skills will be more important than sport, only a very small number of people make a good living from sport but if he is good at ICT he will do well.

derxa, read 2StripedSocks comments, you might think that but other people's experiences are different.

No one has explained why this is the one day sporty children can shine, I would really like someone to explain that.

I think there's an increasing focus on PE actually, precisely because we are seeing a national epidemic of obesity among children. I think physical activity should be encouraged in schools. In fact you could argue that one of the reasons other countries have historically performed better in the Olympics etc is because there hasn't been enough focus on sports. There is a huge focus on academia and always has been. Not so much with sport.

Beauty Maths and literacy etc are tested regularly, with certificates given out for accomplishment. Even moving up a level in reading is an achievement. Like it or not, children are pitted against each other in this respect at an early age. It's much more difficult for children to achieve in PE, simply because it is not given the same prominence in teaching. It also mostly encourages team sports, which means it's more difficult for individual excellence to be awarded.

And yet so many people have agreed that sports day wasn't something positive, wasn't something that made them want to do sport. Maybe someone should think about how to get children involved in activity that they enjoy as we are all more likely to do things that are enjoyable.

I never found standing freezing at the edge of a hockey pitch did much for my fitness levels, Irish dancing now that worked up a sweat.

My kids are the least sporty you'll meet. They still enjoy it. But the school (US) has a good plan. Each child goes in about 3 events which they choose with the teacher. So the class will have about 8 students in each event. Mine pick the pumpkin rolling (yes really) and the balloon pop (run to chair, sit on balloon filled with water until it pops, run back). They also do soccer goal kick, run to teacher-get a face paint-run back. And of course a serious run for the runners. It's all fun and there isn't a lot of usual athletics type events. I guess that will change for grade 6.

For primary, it's best to keep it fun and engaging, so maybe the format needs to change a bit.