AIBU to put 2 small pieces of beetroot on his plate?

[Sapeke1]

Week in week out I cook. Seven days a week with a roast on Sunday the same boring food with the same boring vegetables (peas, carrots) that my family will eat but TODAY I cut a BEETROOT into chunks and steamed it put most of it on my plate but I gave the everyone else 2 small pieces to try. My husband reacted like it was a sheep's eyeball or something, shouting "WHY HAVE YOU PUT BEETROOT ON MY PLATE?" and scooped it into the compost caddy thus undermining any attempts to encourage the kids to try this exotic new vegetable. Should I just stop cooking or what?

Man and wife was a gut response btw

Went to a wedding at the weekend

Not sure what being a woman has to do with it ficbia....If you think shouting at someone is an appropriate response, then fine. We're never going to agree.

NeverACleverNN apologies, I was being pedantic. Sorry, it wasn't really a relevant thing to bring up in this thread.

No worries. Husband and wife is better than man and wife but couldn't think of the correct term for the moment and the wedding flashed in my head and grasped on to that

I understand that. But knowing that you do it, and excusing anyone who shouts for any reason, is not the same thing.

As many people have already said to you, and which you have continued to ignore, it that this thread is NOT about you and your condition.

If OP's husband has such a violent reaction to particular foods, don't you think she would have mentioned it in her post, even if she wasn't aware it was a phobia?

Because,ficbia, this isn't about you.

Because you have absolutely no evidence to suggest that he even has a condition?

If I trip up and then swear, does that mean people should start suggesting I have Tourette's?

I am very pleased you have been able to use this thread to raise awareness.

Now, about the OP's non food issue related unacceptably jerk like behaviour.............

Hear hear Bertrand!

Poor OP, she's probably never coming back...

OP- if you are still reading, he behaved like an arse. I think you should have q conversation with him about setting the children a good example about trying new things. And another one about shouting at you. Tell him never to do that again.

Oh fgs OP please come back and put everyone out of their misery. From her op it does not sound like he had any food aversions and ficbia you say you have involuntary reactions to the food, fair enough. But if this man has no food aversions whatsoever and just plain and simple does not like beetroot, there is no excuse for him shouting at the table infront of his kids, at someone who has just made and served him food!! Totally unacceptable, there's no minimising it!

"It's not the beetroot she has issues with. It's the taking away the choice for your married partner"

How did she take his choices away? He got his tea cooked for him, as I cook for my DP. He didn't have to eat it. Partners usually cook for each other little surprises. I don't always tell him everything in the meal as it's usually always something I know he likes. Once or twice there's been something he's said he doesn't like and has left it on the side. If he was rude to me again I'm not talking about food aversions I wouldn't cook for him again.

How is anyone here being disabilst

I do the cooking. I don't serve DH things i know he doesn't like but neither do I run everything past him before serving up. On the rare occasion I have given him something he doesn't want he just doesn't eat it, because he's a reasonable adult.
And before anyone starts wailing about food issues, I know he doesn't have any, as I suspect OP's DH doesn't, and it would be different if he did.
The thread is about OP being bored eating the same food all the time and trying to encourage the kids to eat different things. Unfortunately her DH is one of those kids and of no help at all.

How is anyone here being disabilst

Little bit. There is a complete disregard of an adult having any sort of food issues. If it was a child, it would be a bit more accepted or a bit more leeway. But because he is an adult man with two children he can't possibly have anything wrong with him right?

No. He can't possibly have anything wrong with him because if he had the OP would have said. There is a complete refusal to believe that he was just being an arsehole. Which he was.

But it has been pointed out that she could possibly not be aware

Yes he could be an arse or he could have an undiagnosed issue. this is the point we are trying to put across.

Fussiness or aversion to food is not just someone being awkward. There can be genuine issues behind it

I think the chances of him having a specific aversion to beetroot that causes him to shout at his wife like a jerk are vanishingly small compared to the chances of him just being a jerk, to be honest. It is pretty unlikely that they have never been together when he saw some beetroot on a buffet or in the supermarket.... I saw 3 different sorts in a quick nip round Morrisons today.....

And anyway, she presumably didn't post instantly- there would have been time for him to say "I'm really sorry I shouted- but I must not have ever told you that I have a phobia about beetroot"

Crikey "taking away his choice as an adult"

If my DH was offended that the fact I do 90% of the grocery shopping, meal planning and cooking meant that I was "taking away his choice" I would not be impressed at all.

Disclaimer - obv I don't make stuff I know he will hate on purpose but, if I'm making it, I'll have most say over what it is!
Also for information - he does pull his weight - he does the housework / I do the cooking.

A food aversion may be part of a disability but it is not a disability in itself. That's not being rude or disablist.

If OPs husband has other sensory issues, other food refusals or rigid adherence to only certain foods, social communication difficulties or other issues that point to a potential disability then okay, dislike of beetroot may be part of a disability but in itself it isn't a disability.

There can be numerous reasons for someone disliking certain foods. There is a potential this could be related to a wider disability but often, it isn't.

I mean this in the gentlest way possible, but while I agree with raising awareness for certain disorders and conditions, I think we just have to be careful not apply the absolute same rules for everything and excuse behaviour because the person may have a hidden disability. They may well do, but without any past history or indication that this may be the case, it becomes very difficult to excuse their behaviour.

I am sorry that you are upset on this thread Ficbia but nothing the OP has said suggests that this man suffers from an eating disorder, and it does sound as though you're projecting slightly.

The chance of him being an arse is very high but it would be nice to not have to read some people think along the lines of "ugh fussy eaters. Won't let them even darken my doorstep"

The correct response when a child acts out is to ask if they have any form of SEN.

It would be incredibly nice for people to think eating disorder instead of just pure fussiness.

It is horrible to feel that you can't talk to people in public about your food issues without being labelled as pandered too and fussy or picky. Or to stop being so silly and grow up.