yummysummerpudding I met my dh through a dating agency aged 33. He procrastinated because he needed time and we married when I was 36. We started trying for a baby at 37 and I had dd aged 39. We tried for number 2 for years and had treatment with my own eggs and then donor eggs, giving up finally and then we adopted ds, aged 3, when I was 49. It's not been easy. BUT it was totally worth it.
It is not easy to get pregnant in your late 40s. I would not say you had another 15 years, this is unrealistic. I would say you have about 5-7 years. So you probably need to decide whether you want to put your time into meeting Mr Right, or Mr Right now, and how to do that. Or go an alternative route and use sperm donor. or some combination of the two!
If this route is not fruitful you could look into adoption, but it is not an easy option and you need to be sure you are not going to want to try IVF, donor sperm or anything else again.
The other option, which we considered, is IVF with donor embryo. This is sometimes a good option if (just as an example) your eggs were not great or you really did get to an older stage and you were struggling to get pregnant with your own eggs. Donor eggs and donor sperm are expensive options but donor embryos are much less so.
There are several countries in Europe which are less costly than UK and have shorter waiting lists. The question if you go for donor embryo or adoption (or even donor egg, as I did) is whether or not being genetically linked to your child is an issue.
How are you unattractive? Looks are not everything but confidence is, confidence makes you look better but sometimes a new hair style a few new clothes or whatever can lead to the confidence and move you forward.
It really is in your own hands. You only need to see those 'celebs' photos in jogging bottoms and without make up and see how different people can look in the right light, right clothes etc.
Dating organisations, some may be better than others. I met my dh through one. I like the look of eHarmony, they have some weekends where joining is free, I believe. Although I have never used their servies specifically. I would use all the usual care you use when meeting anyone f you go down the dating agency route.
Lovelyholiday I am so glad all went well with your operation. I wish you well in your future journey.
Can I ask if you know the man well, and how well, Lovelyholiday? I would say to be careful, co-parenting with a stranger (someone you do not know well) may sound fine now but years down the line will it be? If it feels not right to proceed then you can stop. Just be aware you are linking yourself to someone you do not know very well at all (I am assuming) and it is a far stronger link than marriage. Would you marry someone you hardly knew? I'd rather have an anonymous donor or ask a really good friend.
In terms of anonymous donor sperm, the law in the UK now is that the child (if there is one) has a right to information on their genetic father and their identity, but I thin it is not until they reach 18. But to you, they would be anonymous. We had treatment with donor eggs and this was how it was when we had that, (it was unsuccessful, but I think that was my body rather than the eggs - normally the eggs is the thing but my case was complicated, no idea how my precious dd hung on in my inhospitable womb!).
I've debated donor sperm and donor eggs with a lot with people and really all the evidence now in terms of what children think is that you need to be honest with kids, just like adoption, in age appropriate ways. It is only really when children are lied to and find out stuff later that it causes such problems.
Good luck.