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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Going away Aibu?

90 replies

Unicornsandfairies44 · 16/06/2016 19:57

So I am meant to be going away for a few days to a spa resort with some girlfriends, but that means leaving my 4 kids with my DH, I trust him to look after them, but he works. So my eldest DD said she could look after the younger ones, but she is revising for her GCSEs. Aibu for leaving her to look after them, because I feel so guilty about it.

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnishing · 16/06/2016 22:56

I'm chortling about some posts being removed, but calling the Daily Fail a bunch of cunts stays 😂

gamerchick · 16/06/2016 23:03

Ah you can't do that man OP, mines finishing up his GCSEs and I just couldn't do it to him to go off on a jolly for that long even if he was well paid for it.

If you can't find another adult to pick up the slack then I really would give this one a miss. Your plan would only work if there was no illness or accidents and Sods law is a twat.

NicknameUsed · 17/06/2016 07:01

I have had two posts removed!

That's a first for me.

If this thread is for real of course you can't expect your daughter to take over your role while she is doing GCSEs. DD is sitting her GCSEs right now, and there is no way on earth that I would expect her to provide free childcare when she should be revising.

Everyone who is a parent knows perfectly well that the end of May and most of June is an important exam period and you should have taken this into account when you decided to put your pleasure before something as important as these exams.

DD's school provided exam timetables months ago. Didn't your DD's school not do the same?

I expressed disbelief at your OP because I really can't believe that a parent is so detached from their child's education.

Coconutty · 17/06/2016 07:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Marmelised · 17/06/2016 07:11

It's not just taking your dd away from revising. Who's going to be there for her, looking after her, giving her a cuddle or some reassurance when she needs it. How bleak.
My mum took my younger siblings away for the first week of my sisters O levels. 40 years on you can still feel the impact when she speaks about it.
And this was one of the most loving and academically supporting mothers you could think of.

SelinaMeyerVP · 17/06/2016 07:22

Why don't you stay home and make sure your DD is up and refreshed, that she has a good breakfast and gets to school ready for an exam, not tired/stressed/battling with siblings - that's your job?

I can't believe you are still trying to go.

Chippednailvarnishing · 17/06/2016 07:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ReginaBlitz · 17/06/2016 07:44

It's selfish. You had four kids you have to sacrifice certain things in life.

Itsjenny · 17/06/2016 15:49

Gosh 3 days?? that sounds like a long spa trip Hmm TBH i dont really think YABU i assume that you could do the school run tues morning and you said that DH will be home not to long after yor DCs school. anyway your DD will have all the time will the other DCs are at school to study. but i think that if your DDs exam is while you are away you should give it a miss Sad

DonkeyOaty · 17/06/2016 16:01

Oh dear. Perhaps you misread the exam timetable, it's easy to get in a muddle with four children to consider.

I have experience of teens/GCSEs and really wouldn't have wanted any of mine distracted by home responsibilities during exam season.

DH should step up. His kids too, non?

TheFairyCaravan · 17/06/2016 16:10

You can't be serious?

Stay at home and look after your own kids if your DH won't take the time off work. Your DD shouldn't be having to interrupt her studies to babysit.

NicknameUsed · 17/06/2016 16:26

"Oh dear. Perhaps you misread the exam timetable, it's easy to get in a muddle with four children to consider."

I don't buy that at all. Everyone knows GCSEs take place at this time of year. Schools send out umpteen exam timetables via email and the students to ensure that exams aren't missed.

Itsjenny · 17/06/2016 16:29

Cant your DH take a day out of work or finish early to help. maybe he could work from home if it is possible

Scoopmuckdizzy · 17/06/2016 16:32

How old are your other DCs?

Chocolatefudgecake100 · 17/06/2016 16:36

Yabu ur daughter needs to revise for her gcses not watch younger siblings i think its selfish

CaptainCrunch · 17/06/2016 16:41

What's with all the weird hidden posts, never seen that before.

NicknameUsed · 17/06/2016 16:48

CaptainCrunch I think some of them are doubting whether the OP is genuine.

CaptainCrunch · 17/06/2016 17:27

Thanks Nickname but don't trollhuntiing posts normally get deleted as opposed to hidden, seems a bit strange.

Chippednailvarnishing · 17/06/2016 18:39

I'm guessing it was the night watch rather than MNHQ.

nonladyofleisure · 17/06/2016 19:03

So I'm reading it as... She will do a school run.... She has 6 hours of studying time if she wishes.. And then pick them up and keep an eye until your husband gets home? She then has 2 full days to do any studying when you're home? Pay her for her time and let her have a treat before her exams etc

No brainer. If I've read it right.

Itsjenny · 17/06/2016 19:13

I agree with you nonladyofleisure i dont think that this should be such a big deal. like you said she just has to go out of the house to school has the whole day to study then makes sure they play nicely. i dont think it sounds to hard even with studying.

Itsjenny · 17/06/2016 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn, duplicate post.

NicknameUsed · 17/06/2016 19:20

Those that think it's OK - do you have teenagers currently doing GCSE exams?

TooGood2BeFalse · 17/06/2016 19:23

I wouldn't OP, sorry, and I'm all in favour of me-time.

I would kind of want to do something nice for your DD though, what a sweetheart for offering at a stressful time for her!

Out of interest how old are your other kids?Or did I miss that? Sorry if so.

EarthboundMisfit · 17/06/2016 19:29

Sorry, OP. I don't think it's a good time either.