he's done it again!

[cushion53]

Had more stuff done to his face!! Today. Without telling me beforehand, because he knows how much I hate it. Then gets all offended when I won't go out with him to watch the footie because I'm scared we'll meet somebody we know and he looks like a laughing stock.

I'm happy, gives me a good excuse not to engage with the idiot.

OP you can't come back to the thread and still not explain what you meant!

Oh i get it, it's a fetish thread!

X posts
If DH had surgery I'd be sad for him, because he doesn't need it. It's his body though, so not my choice. I didn't marry him for how he looks.

Your lotion and hairspray comments are bizarre, why can't a man take care of his appearance?

what 'man' uses hairspray ???

please, tell me mums netters. If your husband was so narcissistic that he has multiple cosmetic surgery procedures, how would you feel?

My DP uses hairspray because he has a bit of a quiff and nothing else holds it up.

At 6' 6" and built like a brick shit house I can assume you he is very manly

I'd have cosmetic surgery tomorrow if I could afford it and although my DH thinks I'm mad, and tells me I am perfect as I am, l know he would be supportive and understanding if I wanted to go ahead. Having a very poor self image and low self esteem can be very debilitating, never mind that it's just about silly 'vanity'. It's not always rational.I hope if my DH felt that way about himself I'd be equally supportive.

Perhaps your husband senses that you really dislike him, Knows that you find him unattractive and hold him in contempt so perhaps he's doing what he can to come out of this relationship with a few shreds of self confidence for when you eventually dump him.

I don't even know what he had done today, it's not tattoos. Its some kind of tightening procedure and he has two big sticking plasters on his face just under his ears he looks ridiculous thank goodness our son is out of the house

Get a grip. My strapping 6' 3, gorgeous, manly husband uses hairspray because his hair is a retro sort of quiff and it looks great.

I really do hope all his efforts will not be in vain and he will eventually find a lovely younger woman who will think that this is all perfectly acceptable.

I'm so happy to hear that other men use hairspray and you accept that.

I'm sure if my OH wasn't a baldie he would use hairspray. If you description of a 'man' is what you want then go get it. I know that this doesn't account for all guys who have all the qualities of the above but all the guys I know who are like the above are serial cheaters and wife beaters

But why should a man be rugged, sporty, tough etc? My DH is none of those, doesn't make him not a man. It's as ridiculous as saying a woman should be girly, primped and preened and rubbish at diy.
It's fair enough for you to prefer a rugged man, but that's your preference, not your dh's failing.

How old are your children?

I dunno about the whole 'rugged, sporty, good at DIY' stereotypical Man Stuff - v limiting IMO.

The fact is his going to such extremes about his appearance bothers you, you cannot change his behaviour, only your response to it. So, decision is yours, really.

why oh why would anybody have cosmetic surgery??? why? and it seems like the only thing holding you back is the cost of it. My husband gets it free so that is somehow more justifiable and I'm supposed to just accept that. He keeps saying 'whats your problem' as if I am the one with the problem!!

The is nothing wrong with manscaping.

If he was to moisturise and wear hair spray and pluck his eye brows so be it

But it's the fact he's going behind your back and having Botox and fillers and surgical alterations to his face that would bother me

I wouldnt mind if my husband had cosmetic surgery but then again I no longer have a husband. Be good if someone manly could rearrange my non husband's face.

my kids are 20, they are twins. If my son turned out like his dad, vain, self centred and addicted to plastic surgery I don't know what I'd do. My daughter never will succumb. I feel sure of that.

How on earth does he get it free? Does he work at a clinic?

Well, if he has an addiction then he will just keep doing it.
And if he is getting it 'free' then I gather it's not any kind of reputable plastic surgeon either

I don't get cosmetic surgery either, but hey ho.

and yes you are right, I can't change his behaviour , and my decision is should I or should I not change my reaction to his behaviour?

he works at a clinic yes

I've seen a thread of yours about this before YANBU I would hate it if my DH did the same and he would think I'd gone mad if I went and had surgery with no word to him because he's my DH and surgery no matter weather it's free or costs a fortune is a big deal to go and have it done with no word to your wife/husband.
Anything could happen it is a bizzare way to behave!