Another buggy in wheelchair space thread

[MsAR]

I got on the bus at the same time as a wheelchair user was queuing to do so. The driver told the wheelchair user there wasn't room, so I quickly checked and saw it was a buggy and a shopping trolley in the space.

The driver told the wheelchair user there would be another bus in a few minutes and they didn't seem to mind and weren't particularly insistent about getting on.

Was I being unreasonable to step in at this point and tell the driver that the person with the buggy should get off as wheelchairs have priority? He was pretty annoyed when I did, and kept repeating that there wasn't space.

I'm in London, and there are clear signs on every bus stating this is the case. I've often had to get off a bus when a wheelchair needed to get on and would never question if asked to do so.

Would it also be unreasonable for me to complain to TFL? I know I'm being a busy body but the driver's attitude really irritated me! I'd like the mumsnet jury to help me decide what to do, if anything.

The changing places campaign would be successful a lot quicker if people who were not directly affected bothered their arse to support it.

I'm shocked at the rudeness of some posters on this thread eg belittling and sneering when a poster admits they lacked awareness. Such nastiness comes across as arrogance. Do you think this helps your cause? Improves awareness? Encourages people to be empathetic?

Exactly. Three very good questions there. It's nothing but arrogance and precisely why these threads have become absolutely pointless.

"And this is a biggy: if there is already a wheelchair user at the bus stop, or if one comes while I am waiting, I see them. I know they are there. If they then started "hinting" at me, I'd be over nice to them, almost sarcastic, and say something along the lines of "Oh yes I do hope there is a space for you. If you struggle getting on I'm sure the driver will help you." Just so they get the fucking hint to stfu and stop worrying about me pushing in their space. "

yeah lets be nice to that poster.......like fuck

I can't think of a single AIBU thread I have read in months where there hasn't been rudeness.
Why are people arguing over such an important issues being held to a higher standard.

The problem with 'does it help your cause' is huge.

Is the point that posters on here will decide whether they should be supportive of people struggling with disabilities only if they are nice to them.
Does it mean they have no sense of what is right or fair, don't decide upon any moral stance or view but will instead treat disabled people as equal only if they ask nicely?

Is that it?

Nothing but arrogance? Which ones? The ones at the beginning where another poster was saying 'and those who don't like it can fuck off' ?
Yes they were indeed completely arrogant.

Why are they absulutely pointless MeAnd only last night you'd said they had changed your viewpoint?

I've been on here 10 years. My son is 19. There have been threads with exactly the same self absorbed 'but what about my bubs' crap on here that whole time.
Being nice doesn't really help.

I think it's much easier to be faux indignant about rudeness than to face the reality that you are fundamentally immensely selfish and really not a nice person.

Meand changes her viewpoint every 5 minutes, wonder why?

Reminds me of a deleted thread the other night.

fanjo I've already apologised for that.

People were rude to me when I was honest about when I lacked awareness, and that MN made me aware thanks to a thread like this one. The reactions I received were bang out of order don't you think?

Actually I thought it was pretty awful when the poster was waiting for a bus in their wheelchair and someone with a pram joined the queue and everyone was judging the person with the pram and waiting (hoping) for them to be 'entitled' and shove the wheelchair user out the way. When in fact the pram user did NOTHING offensive and was just going about their business. Perhaps they should get the flowers?

Exactly re AIBU pag.

Poster posted the other night with light hearted disclaimer about wanting her DH to get chocolate, the posts were shocking to her. "Get a grip you're selfish "etc.

Someone posts about shitting themselves or lying their child on the floor in an exasperated manner ."You're all so rude ".

You'd think people wanted a bunfight or something.

Yes, if you wanted to twist it like that village.

It's too early for a semantics related bunfight

TheVillagePost

Gosh that sounds truly awful!
Life is just filled with moments of unendurable difficulty.
People on an anonymous website speculating in a gallows humour way.
That's exactly the same as someone admitting that people with disabilities can fuck off.

The last time I took ds in his sn buggy on a bus someone with a toddler buggy jumped the queue and then refused to fold it. I am glad I have a car now so don't have to deal with this anymore.

snowgirl Because I got ripped in to for something I used to lack awareness of. Which means people are never happy, which makes these threads pointless. What's the point in laying in to me about my past unless it's just so you can stick the boot in? Like I said, arrogant.

MeAnd

You posted some incredibly shitty things. You then apologised. People were angry with you. You recieved some rude responses from people whose already difficult lives are made considerably harder by living with the attitudes you expressed.

You now seem determined to be a huge victim which does slightly undermine the sincerity of your apology.
If you really did mean that you recognise how hard the lives of people like Sirzy are made by attitudes like those you expressed, then you will drop it.

If you continue posting snakily and acting as if you are a helpless victim there is a danger that you will apear totally two faced or a bit thick.

Well now you're just being a bit silly!

That comment was to Pagwatch

Such weird cycling between earnest understanding and abuse, very odd.

if you post something really bad and the regret it. the solution is to report your own post and ask mn hq to remove it.
or you can just leave it and people will judge you

Golly. Being silly.

TheVillagePost every time ii catch the bus with ds, every time - my stomach turns over when I see there is a buggy in the wheelchair space, or there is a buggy in the queue, because there is the potential that we won't be able to get on, or that they will get arsey with me when I ask if they could fold. The majority of the time we jostle and make room, or I hold their baby while they fold and things are OK - but we have had to get off and miss appointments, and I have had people question why they should fold, looking directly at Ds asking, 'what's wrong with him?'

I always try to be polite, and patient on these threads but sometimes reading some of the begrudging posts on here just tips me over.

i think there are some people on here who are goading and trying to cause a bunfight so thread goes.