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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be pissed off that dp shared a golliwog picture.

128 replies

MySordidCakeSecret · 21/05/2016 21:07

because "he sees nothing wrong with it" Hmm

amongst other things that have pissed me off.. using the word retard, pushing our sons face into his ice cream for a laugh, and then calling me boring because i said any drifting in a car would have to be done on a race track and not the roads.

Feel like i'm living with a teenager.

OP posts:
Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 11:19

I had a golliwog when I was a kid. I absolutely loved him and had zero idea of any connection. To me he was just a little doll. So I still have affection for golliwogs and smile when I see one. Not because I'm racist, but because it reminds me of a childhood love!

There is nothing wrong with that. That's why people share these pics, because we're not 'allowed' fondness of something from our childhood anymore

So it's a brattish "I'll do what I want" finger-flick at he more evolved mores of 21st century society then? (And at anyone who may be justifiably offended at a 'fuck you' mass display of offensive racial stereotype).

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 11:19

I had a golliwog when I was a kid. I absolutely loved him and had zero idea of any connection. To me he was just a little doll. So I still have affection for golliwogs and smile when I see one. Not because I'm racist, but because it reminds me of a childhood love!

There is nothing wrong with that. That's why people share these pics, because we're not 'allowed' fondness of something from our childhood anymore

So it's a brattish "I'll do what I want" finger-flick at he more evolved mores of 21st century society then? (And at anyone who may be justifiably offended at a 'fuck you' mass display of offensive racial stereotype).

BertrandRussell · 22/05/2016 11:31

"Pushing a child's face into an ice cream is not 'child abuse'.

For fuck's sake."

No. But it is the action of an aresehole.

iLikeBoringThings · 22/05/2016 11:41

I stand by what i said.

How anyone can look at a Golliwog and find him 'extremely distressing' is beyond me.

A Golliwog used in a deliberately racist way to offend someone, on the other hand is extremely distressing.

There's a big difference.

Being told what i should find offensive by people that have never faced racism or had to deal with the issues they are shouting about really pisses me off!

Maybe if you had some personal experience of being discriminated against purely because of the colour of your skin, you would realise that the real issues still faced by the black community on a daily basis are far more serious than a toy.

You can find something to be in bad taste, that's your opinion, but to call someone 'ignorant and a bit stupid' because the don't share your opinion is offensive.

FarrowandBallAche · 22/05/2016 11:42

Anyone that shares a golliwog picture gets deleted.

Highsteaks · 22/05/2016 11:44

No. But it is the action of an aresehole

Well yes, but I referring specifically to the accusations ofnchild abuse.

He does sound like a total bellend, and I know a coupe of blokes just like that IRL who are just pensises, but if the child thought it was funny then I can't get my knickers in a knot about the ice cream incident. Hes a dick for sharing the gollywog picture though.

MrMainwaringsWife · 22/05/2016 11:49

I'm confused now

A friend on FB shared this , she happens to be married to a man who is black

Highsteaks · 22/05/2016 11:54

iLike that may well all be true. But why do people have to get all outraged and act as if they are being oppressed or their human rights are being compromised of something because they can't share a picture ofna gollywog on Facebook because lots of people (black and white) think it's offensive?

roarfeckingroar · 22/05/2016 12:05

I have a golliwog doll at my parent's house; loved it as a child. It isn't on display, just in a cupboard and I wouldn't buy one/share a picture because - well, just why?

Honest question - should I have to throw him away because they are no longer acceptable? Does it make me a racist to still have him as a loved memory from childhood?

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 12:13

In a cupboard seems a reasonable place roar. You seem to have a reasonable person's awareness of why they are no longer acceptable in public.

I have very fond memories of playing 'spies' loose on the back seat of my dad's car and also of a friend's mum transporting us in the boot of her estate car. But I know that's not acceptable now and wouldn't try to recreate the experience for my DC (or share a 'why oh why can't I put my DC in the boot?' meme around FB).

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 12:13

In a cupboard seems a reasonable place roar. You seem to have a reasonable person's awareness of why they are no longer acceptable in public.

I have very fond memories of playing 'spies' loose on the back seat of my dad's car and also of a friend's mum transporting us in the boot of her estate car. But I know that's not acceptable now and wouldn't try to recreate the experience for my DC (or share a 'why oh why can't I put my DC in the boot?' meme around FB).

UmbongoUnchained · 22/05/2016 12:40

Being told what i should find offensive by people that have never faced racism or had to deal with the issues they are shouting about really pisses me off!

^this!!!

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 22/05/2016 13:03

Well said iLike Actually, I'd say that everyone else deciding what black people should find racist is racist in itself!

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:13

Being told what i should find offensive by people that have never faced racism or had to deal with the issues they are shouting about really pisses me off*

^this!!!

But what they're talking about is the insidious effect on everyone of racist imagery, which should be everyone's concern.

It's not like everyone objecting to the golly is claiming that they have personally been on the receiving end of racism and racist behaviour.

It would be terrible to take the attitude that sexism is women's problem to deal with, homophobia is gay people's problem to deal with, racism is only for the BAME community to confront.....

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 22/05/2016 13:21

A lot of people do find it offensive. Therefore IMO sharing it is just rubbing it in their faces. It's not a matter ofpeople saying it should be offensive. Some people do find it offensive and that's enough reason for me not to share it in inflammatory manner.

UmbongoUnchained · 22/05/2016 13:22

It would be terrible to take the attitude that sexism is women's problem to deal with, homophobia is gay people's problem to deal with, racism is only for the BAME community to confront.....

That's not what we're saying.
I just don't appreciate white people dictating to me what I'm allowed to be offended by and what I shouldn't be. It happens all the fucking time.

UmbongoUnchained · 22/05/2016 13:23

It's the same sort of thing as mansplaining basically.

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:25

A lot of people do find it offensive. Therefore IMO sharing it is just rubbing it in their faces. It's not a matter ofpeople saying it should be offensive. Some people do find it offensive and that's enough reason for me not to share it in inflammatory manner.

This.

And I don't want my DC or any of my young friends and relatives seeing it and thinking 'it's up in public, it's obviously in the realms of okay', whatever ethnicity they are.

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:26

It's the same sort of thing as mansplaining basically.

No it's really not. You be as offended or un-offended as you like. But a lot of people are offended.

UmbongoUnchained · 22/05/2016 13:30

I don't get the chance to be offended usually because all my white friend shave already down the gasping and explaining on why that's not an ok thing to say on behalf of me. Half the time I'm not offended at all. But they think I should be.

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:32

Half the time I'm not offended at all. But they think I should be.

Tell them to piss off Grin

UmbongoUnchained · 22/05/2016 13:35

Haha I should do but it's not just my friends it's everyone. It's a shame. I definitely think that white people have gotten themselves so afraid now of being called racist. Which is a real shame because sometimes it is ok to laugh about things. Im totally the other way though and really don't get offended by anything unless it's meant maliciously.

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:42

Yes. I think as a society we have a lot of collective shock and shame about some really dubious things that previous generations thought were fine. It manifests itself strangely sometimes.

Just5minswithDacre · 22/05/2016 13:42

( I still detest gollies though Smile )

BertrandRussell · 22/05/2016 15:54

I have no desire to tell black people what they should be offended by.

As a white British person, though, I have a strong desire not to perpetuate our societal racism.. So I object to gollywogs, not on behalf of black people, but because they represent something very unpleasant in my culture that I would like to do everything I can to root out.