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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

In light of a mumsnetters new found fame.....

114 replies

Catvsworld · 11/05/2016 13:41

Your most grabby stories

I will go first my son who was 13 at the time was invited to a theme park I didn't think nothing of it and said he could go but he would pass my number to the boys mum to sort out how they are getting there meet up times ect

The night before I get a text saying just to let you know it will be £80 for the following

Ticket
Fast pass
And lunch Confused

Before I could respond I then got a text saying I understand you will have 3 spare seats in the back could you pick up .....and ........and ........ Followed by there address its all been sorted wtf

I had to tell my son sadly he wouldn't go as she invited him and we didn't have £80 spare and even if we did have the money to go no way would we be paying for a fast pass and definitely wouldn't be leaving a hour early to pick up the other boys as they didn't even leave near us let alone near each other o sadly it meant the other 3 boys couldn't go but why on earth she felt she could arrange lifts when she hadn't asked me and for boys I or my son didn't even no

Grabby birthday lady

OP posts:
MitzyLeFrouf · 11/05/2016 17:41

Singing your mother most definitely is a cunt. I hope she's out of your life.

MitzyLeFrouf · 11/05/2016 17:41

oh x post there.

WhoAteAllThePies · 11/05/2016 18:02

Op said birthday, so I'm happy to say that grabbylady was grabby as fuck.

WhoAteAllThePies · 11/05/2016 18:03

Soft play, themepark, cinema, doesn't matter how much it costs you pay for the birthday party, or you explain how much it costs.

I bet grabbylady was going to pay for it with Tesco vouchers and buy 1 get ones too.

ScreenshottingIsNotJournalism · 11/05/2016 18:15

IMO if the invitation is for a birthday, you only pay for a present, but some people seem to think that any invite = the planner pays all? That can't be right? non birthday invites are more like playdates IMO and you pay for your own child?

bubblegurl252 · 11/05/2016 18:27

Is not money-grabby.
But the same BIL and his wife also went mental at us and caused a huge family rift because they weren't chosen as godparents. My BIL actually tried to assault me because they weren't chosen as godparents.

sandy30 · 11/05/2016 18:27

Dad came to stay with us for a few days. Said he would take us out for a meal to thank us for our hospitality so we picked somewhere we thought he would like. Me and DH ordered cheaper menu; dad goes for expensive option costing double ours with matched booze for each course. Once pissed, he announces that at me and dh both working, we should foot the bill. (NB my dad was earning 6 figures at the time while we are both teachers!) So we did, but have never eaten out with him since...

MiddleClassProblem · 11/05/2016 18:28

Omg these people are awful. The tip stealer sounds like a kleptomaniac though.
And singing your mum sounds awful but things are different when you have a handle on it in the adult world. You sound lovely despite the shit she did.

ScreenshottingIsNotJournalism · 11/05/2016 18:32

Here's mine: someone borrowed my electric air mattress, not a cheapo one a proper blow up bed that feels like a real bed, not cheap

Her DD broke it, not only did she not replace it, she asked me to either fix or replace it because she needed to borrow it for a bit longer Shock

sandy30 · 11/05/2016 18:34

Oh and I got a scholarhip to boarding school when I was 14 (thank fuck). When I got home for holidays, discovered I was sleeping in the (unheated, in English winter) all-glass conservatory as my dad had rented out my bedroom to a trucker.

WhoAteAllThePies · 11/05/2016 18:42

My BIL actually tried to assault me because they weren't chosen as godparents.

I'd definitely want to leave my kids with him Hmm

Sometimeslostforwords · 11/05/2016 18:45

I'm just Shock at all these stories. Especially by parents scrounging off their children! Just, wow.

Despite everything you all sound lovely.

I think people who behave like this get away with it because they take advantage of kind, generous folk who make excuses for them. One of the benefits of growing older, though, is that while I continue to be generous to those who are worthy of it, I certainly wouldn't put up with scroungy people like grabby woman any longer. They should embarrassed at their behaviour.

bubblegurl252 · 11/05/2016 18:46

His family sided with him over that issue as well, apparently him running at me in public taking a swing for me was my fault because they should've been godparents due to them being family. Their mother then disowned my husband at our sins christening because of it.
They are crazy.

bubblegurl252 · 11/05/2016 18:47

*sons

Hurryhurryhurry · 11/05/2016 18:48

Op did you not offer to pay when the invite came in? That's the first thing I do out of politeness.

FreakinScaryCaaw · 11/05/2016 18:49

SingingSad

ZippyNeedsFeeding · 11/05/2016 18:53

Oh and I got a scholarhip to boarding school when I was 14 (thank fuck). When I got home for holidays, discovered I was sleeping in the (unheated, in English winter) all-glass conservatory as my dad had rented out my bedroom to a trucker.
Not quite on the same scale but while I was at boarding school my mother decided she didn't like the area she was living in, so they moved to a smaller house where there was no room for me (3 other children were not sent to another country for school). I had to sleep in the cellar, in a room with all my dads tools.

prettybird · 11/05/2016 18:59

No stories anywhere near as bad as this but it reminds me of one of my mum's friends' new partner, who always insisted on using a calculator to work out "their" share when they were out for a meal - even when everyone had had roughly the same thing (so it wasn't a case of others choosing an expensive wine or having extra starters/dessert) - and refused to leave a tip Hmm

I was describing this to my best friend and she said, "I bet he's the sort of person who irons his pyjamas". She'd never met him, but she described him to a T! Grin

MiddleClassProblem · 11/05/2016 19:01

Prettybird I'd rather that than someone splitting when someone has clearly had less. Been in that situation. It's just like Friends

MiddleClassProblem · 11/05/2016 19:02

Although should tip! (Unless they were completely useless and there was a fly in your food)

DancingHippo · 11/05/2016 19:11

My younger sister offered us a fridge that she could not fit in the kitchen of her house. It was bigger than our current one so we said we'd have it. Our mother had bought it for her. She charged us £100 for it. We discovered it was covered in dents where her boyfriend used to punch it.

Approximately 18 months later, we moved abroad but left various items in a storage facility, already being rented by my mother long term, as we had not decided whether we would be coming back. There were some quite new expensive bookcases and matching sideboard, a newish large TV, the fridge, washing machine, and dishwasher and a few smaller items.

We came back a year later with nothing but suitcases and discovered my sister had had the lot of it, including the fridge we'd paid her for! The bookcases and sideboard had been smashed up by said boyfriend.

My mother gave us a small TV which did not actually work, which we discovered after we'd carted it across country 800 miles, and insisted that it was ours as it was the one in the storage unit. Sister said she had not seen any TV in the storage unit. We visited her house around a year later and saw there, in pride of place in the lounge Hmm.

Before we left to move abroad, we'd left DH's car with her as she'd told us she'd found someone to buy it. She'd send the money on later, she said. Did we see it? Did we hell!

Another sister - we offered her our 2 year old 3 seater sofas (2 of them) as we decided to get leather ones as we needed something wipe clean with toddler twins! They were in very good condition (washable covers + a spare set) and had cost around £1500 altogether. She really needed them as her's were falling to bits. Her husband borrowed a work colleagues van to transport them. She later told me I should have paid her to take them as it would have cost us money if we were to hire a van to dispose of them, and she was serious!

fassone · 11/05/2016 19:11

Lent friend a £200 extended rear facing car seat. She lost a critical component of it, rendering it useless as a rearfacing seat so used it forward facing.
1.5 years went by with no sign of it being returned.
One day she drove to us, in a brand spanking new car. Fab. As I got in for a proper ooh and aah I noticed our car seat had gone to be replaced by a new one.
"Oh I sold it," was the reply.

EweAreHere · 11/05/2016 19:13

Some of these stories are just mind-boggling!

prettybird · 11/05/2016 19:16

My parents would've been perfectly comfortably with this: however, the difference in cost between what people had ordered was less than a pound Shock- hence the need for a calculator Hmm. He would literally put down the exact amount to the penny and leave everyone else to stump up for the tip.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 11/05/2016 19:22

My sister has had some grabby moments.
Quite a few years ago, my Dad decided he wanted a new car and asked if I'd like his old one as the car I was driving at the time was very old - in pretty good condition for its age, but old.
I said yes, thanks Dad!
My Mum also told me about the same time that there was £200 left in an old account of my sadly deceased Grandma. She was going to give it to me as Grandma had given my sister a similar amount towards her wedding and had intended to do the same for me, had she not passed away.
I saw neither car nor money. My sister heard about the car and stuck her bloody oar in, as she felt she needed the car more, as her car was in poor condition (because she never maintained it in any way at all). I was given no choice in this at all, I was told that instead I could have the Volkswagen Polo that belonged to her husband and they'd have my Dads car and my old car. I was told the Polo was in good condition.
This was an out and out lie. The thing had rust like a greasy teenagers acne, the radio only worked if you held it in with one hand all the time and it nearly killed me the first time I drove it as the windscreen wipers locked together and didn't move if you put them on the fast setting. She didn't tell me that and thought it was quite funny when I complained that I'd suddenly found myself unable to see where I was going in the rain.
I had to be very un-British and ask my Mum about the money a few months later as I'd assumed she'd just forgotten. No, my sister had been going on about how the door sills on my Dads car needed work doing to them and my Mum had given her the money!
She then had the audacity to phone me up and complain bitterly that the head gasket on my old car had gone about six months later. She'd continued to drive with the red warning light on and the overheating had damaged it so much it was beyond fixing.
Was it wrong of me to laugh back at her? Probably, but after Incident Polo I didn't much care and it had been in perfect nick when I gave it to her and it was the second car she'd managed to blow a head gasket on.