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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think swimming teachers are obsessed with putting face in water

134 replies

2catsnowaiting · 09/05/2016 14:24

Here's the thing. All my children love going to the pool and enjoy playing in the water. All of them, at a young age hate or hated putting their face in the water.

The older two taught themselves to swim by using flotation jackets, from which I gradually removed the floats, until they were able to swim without the jacket. I tried the same thing with the youngest, but he has now outgrown the jacket and no sign of any bouyancy at all. He can just about swim with a noodle float but even that is a struggle.

I'm wondering whether to put him in for swimming lessons, however, from my limited experience of it, it seems that swimming teachers are obsessed with making kids put their faces in the water, as if this is more important than actual swimming, and you can't learn to swim without doing so. I know this is not the case as my oldest got her 10m badge swimming with her head out of the water. She then did 6 weeks of lessons with school, at the end of which she would put her face in the water, and then they said she could get her 10m badge, which she already had before she started - how is that progress? I realise that if you are planning to become a professional or competitive swimmer, then you need to learn correct technique, but clearly none of mine are, I just want them to enjoy swimming for fun/exercise. My mum is in her 60s and still swims with her head out of the water, it's never done her any harm.

My worry is, (and the reason the older two have never had swimming lessons outside the very few they had with school) that he will start to hate going swimming because the teachers will make him put his face in the water. I would rather he loved going to the pool and couldn't swim than started to hate it.

Has anyone experienced swimming lessons where they do not insist they have to put their faces in to make any progress? I'm unwilling to pay good money for someone to make my child do something he hates.

OP posts:
queenofthemountains · 09/05/2016 18:08

My daughter had to learn to swim with her head out of the water due to a hole between her nose and mouth which meant she chocked if she went underwater. It drove me mad constantly asking the teacher to make sure she didn't make her put her head underwater, every week I had to remind them she couldn't do it. In the end I got sick of them not taking her needs into account and found a brilliant private teacher who taught her to swim with her head out.

It can be done.

Betrayedbutsurvived · 09/05/2016 18:13

I was pushed fell into a canal as a child. I could swim, but always refused to get water on my face. Result? I panicked, forgot how to swim, and very nearly drowned.

2catsnowaiting · 09/05/2016 18:14

Interesting that so many do think it's necessary. It's not that I don't think he will ever have to put his face in the water, just that I think it's more important that he learns to float. Also I don't really buy that swimming is a life skill, and I live at the seaside. In my life I've never known anyone actually fall into water, how likely is it? The only real reason to learn to swim IMO is to enjoy swimming for leisure and not looking like a fool in front of your friends when a teenager. Bit like riding a bike.

My cousin did those baby swim classes where they swim under water. At the age of 5 he could swim like a fish under water but couldn't actually keep his head above water. Again, call me a fool if you like, but I consider keeping your head above water more important.
.

OP posts:
WreckingBallsInsideMyHead · 09/05/2016 18:17

Op yabu and almost everyone on here has agreed with that, why post at all if you're gonna carry on insisting that you're right and we and the professional instructors are all wrong?

Queen of the mountains - your dd had a medical issue that meant it was more dangerous for her to do it than not. Her teachers definitely should've respected that.

But a medical issue is absolutely not the same as a child not liking water in their face!

Believeitornot · 09/05/2016 18:20

If you're going to swim, damn well do it properly!

And just because you've never met anyone who's fallen in to water it doesn't mean it couldn't happen.

Your post OP has made my eyes roll so hard, it hurt

Andro · 09/05/2016 18:23

In my life I've never known anyone actually fall into water, how likely is it?

It happens; bad weather and slippery conditions, lack of attention or an accidental trip can easily see a child take an unexpected dip. What's more likely, especially living near water, is that someone starts acting the fool and thinks pushing or dunking other people is funny.

Some teachers can be a little over zealous in their quest to get faces in water, good teachers will guide more gently if they know a child is nervous. Like most skills, finding the right teacher is the key to success.

cleopatraseyebrows · 09/05/2016 18:24

YABU. I was never taught or encouraged to get my face in water. Consequently I'm a crap swimmer who never mastered how to breathe while swimming.

Swimming head up is like only ever learning how to drive an automatic car. Why not learn how to use a gearstick if you're going to the bother of lessons?

Aworldofmyown · 09/05/2016 18:24

Love it - one of those AIBU threads where everyone says YABU.

Yet the OP still thinks not!!

YABU by the way.

I can't swim with my head under water and hate getting my face wet, I wish that I had learnt to swim properly. My daughter hated head under water, lots of encouragement and perseverance means she has no issue with it at all ad swims like a fish.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 09/05/2016 18:29

I think it's more important that he learns to float.

Unless you have a lot of bodyfat it is very hard to float with your head out of the water...

useyourimagination · 09/05/2016 18:33

See, for me it's the other way round - I don't put my head under water and I wish I could. I always think I should take DD's goggles with me and try but something holds me back. I always end up with a stiff neck from keeping my head out of the water. Sometimes I do a couple of lengths of back stroke just to give my neck a rest.

pilates · 09/05/2016 18:35

Love it - one of those AIBU threads where everyone says YABU.

Yet the OP still thinks not!!

Just what I was thinking Grin

elfycat · 09/05/2016 18:40

DD1 paused for weeks because she needed to put her face in the water without her goggles on. With goggles on she'd happily sink under, but wouldn't dip her face in without.

We fully supported the teacher and told DD1 we were happy to pay for lessons forever, and for her to stay at that level until she felt able to do the last task. After 3 weeks she managed it. Of course we're now at the point where she needs to complete one more skill for the next level, and is whining about it.

DH and I are scuba divers (DH is a qualified instructor). We both hate the drill of taking the masks off underwater, putting them back on and clearing the mask. But we do it and we practice it an extra time too, because we hate it.

HeirOfNothingInParticular · 09/05/2016 18:40

I agree with everyone else, YABU. I didn't learn to swim until my early forties, and had a life long fear of water. My instructor eventually taught me put my face in the water, and I conquered my phobia. I can swim in the sea or public pool now without being scared of being splashed etc. Also, I think that I get more benefit out of my swimming sessions now that I can do the technique properly. Oh, and after that I learned how to dive and jump in (only off the side etc) but that was something I hadn't planned on every doing.

2catsnowaiting · 09/05/2016 18:42

Wreckingball, I don't "keep insisting", that was my first reply!

Dd1 aged 10 just got to a point of her own accord a few years back when she was happy to put her face in. Hopefully Ds will do so too. He's having swimming lessons with school next term, which I suspect will be 6 weeks of them trying get his face in rather than actually learning to swim but we shall see.

By the way I do swim wth my head in myself but I wasn't forced to do it as a small child for which I am glad.

OP posts:
2catsnowaiting · 09/05/2016 18:44

Heir, the thing is he's NOT afraid of water now but i think making him put his face in will make him afraid. Obviously I'm wrong according to the world though. 😃 that's ok I can live with that.

OP posts:
JessieMcJessie · 09/05/2016 18:49

You don't agree that being able to swim is a life skill? Okaaay Hmm. I'm not sure there's much point trying to reason with you. I am also guessing that you yourself have trouble with swimming/face in water OP and are passing this fear on to your children.

In the next instalment, OP questions whether parking is really necessary in the driving test.

Gettoff · 09/05/2016 18:49

I was forced to do this as a child. I was terrified of water for years because of it. I can swim, but always keep my head out of the water, and when l go swimming which I do a lot, it seems so do the majority of swimmers.

Dd hated it too, and refused to go to lessons because of it. We taught her in the end, and she's fine with it now. I understand it's about confidence, but it isn't the best method for teaching every one.

JessieMcJessie · 09/05/2016 18:49

Cross post re your own swimming issues then OP, fair enough.

AChickenCalledKorma · 09/05/2016 18:54

Personally I know two children who have accidentally fallen into water. One of them was my daughter and I'm bloody glad she was confident in the water and knew how to swim. It only takes a second.

TrashPanda · 09/05/2016 18:56

It is a hugely important life skill. Very close to where I used to live they are currently searching for a 16yo lad who got into difficulty swimming on Saturday and hasn't been seen since Sad

Mov1ngOn · 09/05/2016 19:02

That's interesting about the badges. My daughters pool has only given my daughter a 15 meter badge as they want good technique in all strokes to.award it!! Even though she swims lengths and has done for over a year.

The pool down the road awards the distances for you just travelling the distance however.

There should be some.middle ground!

arethereanyleftatall · 09/05/2016 19:04

'I think it's more important he learns to float'
Types of float:

  1. Mushroom float - face under water
  2. Front star float - face under water
  3. Back star float - head far back, looking up, and actually most of face under wAter - but interestingly, I have taught thousands of children to swim, I don't think I've met one yet who learnt to do an unsupported back star float before learning to put their head under - because the water goes all over your face when you get in to this position and you need to be able to handle this.

As others have said, face under is fundamental to swimming with good technique.

I teach school swimming - y3 & y4. I can honestly say I (and all the other teachers) find it a little heartbreaking when a child starts these lessons without being able to swim basic strokes with face in. A bit like expecting the teachers to potty train or teach your child to read without any parental input.

lljkk · 09/05/2016 19:06

It's great when you see your kids swimming strongly. You can enjoy their sense of achievement and confidence in having met challenges. Plus they get to show off. Grin. They can go snorkeling. Then as an adult they can do swim challenges themselves or use swimming as suitable cross training for other sports.

A 17yo gal helped save a boatload of people by being able to swim.

00100001 · 09/05/2016 19:08

Its like saying, why bother to leanr to bride a bike without stabilisers. Confused

Why do I need to learn to balance, I can just use stabilisers. I can ride for miles with stabilisers. Its nits like its essential that I remove them. Its not a life skill now,is it??

bringmelaughter · 09/05/2016 19:10

Drowning is the leading cause of death in the under 5s and about 200 people in England and Wales die every year from drowning. I'd say it's a life skill.