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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Naked children in the park - who is right?

497 replies

Oysterbabe · 08/05/2016 17:24

We're currently enjoying the sun in the park with DD 4 months (who is enjoying it by being asleep in the shade) It is packed with families as you'd expect. In the group next to us there are two little girls, I'm going to guess about 4 and 5, who are having a lovely time running around and playing completely in the buff. I was saying to DH that I wouldn't let our DD run around naked at that age in such a public place. There could be any number of dodgy characters watching on and getting off on it. He thinks it's fine, that they're still young enough to get away with it. Also in the unlikely event there is a lurking paedo, they're completely oblivious and it's not going to hurt them at all, you can't live in fear.
Who's right? Am I being too Daily Mail paedo round every corner or is it correct to be cautious about such things?

OP posts:
ForalltheSaints · 08/05/2016 20:11

I would not be in the slightest bit concerned.

Sparklingbrook · 08/05/2016 20:11

Your NN has just reminded me Matthew. Will this thread be snapped up by the man himself for the panel to pick over this week?

Enjoyingthepeace · 08/05/2016 20:13

i have a strange position on this issue.

I have absolutely zero problem with two five year old girls running around naked in a local park. Wouldn't bat an eye.

However my five year old daughter would never ever be permitted to do it.

HeffalumpHistory · 08/05/2016 20:15

Back in the day I would have agreed with your H but in the days of smartphones & instant photos/recording by any randoms I am totally with you. Plus the extra sun cream thing!!
My DC do love to run around the garden in the buff though

icanteven · 08/05/2016 20:23

I'm fine with naked children. It depends on the context.

Mostly my two would have their knickers on in an urban environment (splash fountain areas in Philadelphia and Copenhagen are two that they have stripped off to their knickers to play in that come to mind), and naked on the beach. For splash parks etc. I'm trying to teach my 7yo a whisp of decorum now, so I'd probably go with knickers on, but when they were 4/5 and under, naked was fine.

Iggi999 · 08/05/2016 20:28

They didn't have splash fountains when I was wee. Envy
I imagine a naked run through one would be a delight.

ErNope · 08/05/2016 20:29

a lot of people saying ''oh so what if theres a paedophile lurking they can't harm DD/DS In front of me can they?'' er no but they can take photos and later wank off to them/post them onto the internet. Gross. WHY would you take the risk? even removing the elevated risk of cutting/bruising an intimate area/hurting their privates on a hot slide/Getting sand in places their shouldn't be sand/mixed behavioral signals and last but not least ending up with your DS/DD's privates in someones face just...
why.

SoftSheen · 08/05/2016 20:30

YANBU. I wouldn't be happy with this for two reasons.

Firstly, 4/5 years old is about the time that children need to start learning about social norms and about keeping private parts private. Wearing clothing in public (or at least pants) is part of this.

Secondly, if it is a hot day children's skin will need proper protection from the sun e.g. a pair of shorts, a T shirt and a sun hat, or a swimming costume/rash vest. This is hardly restrictive and should not in any way prevent children from having fun.

SuperFlyHigh · 08/05/2016 21:17

Beach maybe, paddling pool in park maybe, actual park with God knows who around, why? They should at least have pants or knickers on.

The only reason I say beach and paddling pool in park is because well they'll get wet there eg their underpants etc.

SuperFlyHigh · 08/05/2016 21:24

What's interesting (oldish gimmer here) is that when I was young I recall a fountain area with water and a big proper concrete paddling pool (both in park/on commons) and I'm sure when we were under 5 (probably up to 3?) I recall my mum letting my brother and I in those naked but after eg 3 it was definitely underpants or swimming costume and paddling pool etc. In fact I recall a fetching pair of terry towelling swim pants I wore. This was back in 1970s.

My mum was also super vigilant re sun cream but of course no mobiles there then though there were sometimes dodgy characters sometimes hanging round those areas.

I think also on beaches from 3 it was same (coverup after then) but presumably towelled up to rinse swimming costumes etc.

mygrandchildrenrock · 08/05/2016 21:24

We live next door to a beach and a large open air paddling pool with dragon fountains. When they were younger, my DC were usually naked. One day at the paddling pool a council official told me to make my youngest DC 'decent'. I told him she was 2 yrs old and was perfectly decent!
We're always told not to change our habits/plans/holidays due to terrorists so why should we change what we do with our children because there might be a perv around?

Floggingmolly · 08/05/2016 21:29

I bet the children are having a fantastic time. I'll bet they are. I'll also bet having a pair of pants on wouldn't detract from the fun one iota. There's no reason for a five year old to run around naked in public.

AIBVVVU · 08/05/2016 21:32

Back garden naked fine. Public park not fine. It's not necessary, it's bad for their skin for prolonged periods and it makes other people uncomfortable. Just smacks of try-hard parenting

ErrieErika · 08/05/2016 21:33

You're right!

I don't get why they need to be naked. All they need is some underwear on! It sends such mixed messages Sad

However, I'm not grossed out by naked children Hmm and I don't judge anyone who allows it, but I bet you haven't taught them the underwear rule?

PrincessHairyMclary · 08/05/2016 21:34

I live by the sea, plenty of little ones running round in the buff here or a tshirt on but know bottoms

Sparklingbrook · 08/05/2016 21:36

I might expect it a bit more at the beach TBH.

SuperFlyHigh · 08/05/2016 21:39

Princess that's becauspe generally if I recall a tshirt can be long enough so it just covers offending genatalia area.

I don't think uncovered genatalia is wrong but I sort of agree that if adults shouldn't let them all hang out in public then why should kids? If you do really want that there are naturist beaches etc.

I've seen the occasional kid run around mostly at beach etc unclothed with obvious pooh problems etc and naked and to be quite honest that's not what I want to see or be worried about sitting in etc when I'm in park etc.

Only1scoop · 08/05/2016 21:39

Yanbu

No need for naked 5 year olds in public parks.

TiggyD · 08/05/2016 21:55

This is why we need a poll feature.

Where is it ok for children to be naked?
Beach?
Park?
National Trust property?
WHSmith?

What age is it ok to be naked?
5?
7?
12?
18?
45?

There must be a line to be drawn somewhere. Where is it?

Sparklingbrook · 08/05/2016 21:58

the thing is everyone has their own line.

LittleLionMansMummy · 08/05/2016 22:01

We struggled to convince ds to keep his clothes on at 2/3yo, so he was naked a fair bit, including on the beach. He's now 5 and I now draw the line at public nakedness but still happy for him to run around the garden and house like it. I don't think ds would be happy for his school friends to see him naked and vice versa, he now knows more about bodies, gender difference and privacy so it seems a good age to get him to cover up in public, regardless of whether or not there might be lurking paedos.

TiggyD · 08/05/2016 22:01

It turned out that Halfords certainly does.

Flower20166 · 08/05/2016 22:03

I too would worry about paedophiles taking photos/videos.

Sparklingbrook · 08/05/2016 22:03

Halfords?

TheoriginalLEM · 08/05/2016 22:03

i would allow my 5yo dd naked on the beach probably wear panties for reason of safety really. in the park i don't see the need