Mother weird about money

[seriouslysusannah]

Disclaimer: I'm very lucky to have parental support from my parents etc. I'm early 20s and they have been very kind to me over the years. No hand-outs per se, but being there for me and supporting me on the odd occasion while I was a student. They also let me live with them during uni holidays.

They are very well-off, which is entirely due to their own hard work and scrimping. My dad had a good job but they both came from very humble backgrounds and made smart financial decisions, so it has certainly not come easy to them. They are also both very frugal.

I recently had an extremely unexpected demand from university to pay £1600 (fees), a lot of money. Student Finance are dragging their feet about it and I'm right in the middle of exams so quite stressed about finding this money.

My dad has very kindly stepped up and said that my parents will cover it. He said that my parents intended on giving me some money when I graduate this year so they will take it out of this sum. Very very kind.

When my mum heard about it though, she became almost cross?? She insisted on me sending them the email, asked if there was interest attached to it, quizzed me about it. I feel like crying! She has always been very suspicious and hesitant where money has been involved, which I find so unfair as I have never ever relied on parental hand-outs to get by! I had a job throughout university and virtually supported myself.

I really want to try and pay for it myself now as a matter of principle but I really can't find the money in a matter of days. Why is she being like this?! She has always been like this. A few months ago I received a rent deposit back from my landlord (about £600) which had originally been paid for by my parents. My dad said I could leave the money in my account "for emergencies" but my mum demanded it back (well not actually but she expressed her disapproval so much that I instantly transferred it).

I hate this attitude!! I feel like a fucking criminal.

[harshbuttrue1980]

I agree with Poppie. I still don't understand why you feel hard done by that your parents are lending you a large sum of money and have dared to ask you questions about it. I don't think anyone should expect to give money without at least having to justify themselves - its your parents money, not yours. As you said, they have worked hard for it. Its now over to you to make your own future by also working hard, as they have done, and standing on your own two feet.