To think SO should know when his football games are on?

[noshthis]

Hi ladies. Hoping you can help settle this issue for me as I know some of you will be in the same situation so it would be helpful to know how you all deal.

My SO is a football fan and goes to all of the home games and some away ones. I am the one who does most the organising even to see his own folks. You know all the house and social admin. I'm not happy with this situation but if I didn't plan things for us to do we wouldn't do much

For those of you in the same situation is it also up to you to make sure you don't book something for the family at the same time as a game?

Recently I arranged to go to his folks house while my father was visiting from abroad. I booked it the week before and asked my SO if the day and time was ok. We discussed it a few times in the week as well. The day comes around and boom there is a game and we have a huge fight. He thinks I should have known there was a game and I should always check the website to make sure before I arrange anything.

I guess I could check the website every time but this isn't my hobby. I think just asking him should be enough? What do you guys do?

I've downloaded the football calendar to my calendar app so most of the games show but the odd cup and championship ones don't or it doesn't update so I feel I do my best but some games just creep up on me.

Thanks!

If he agrees the time, its fine. That's the whole point of asking him - to make sure it's convenient for him. If a game is on, he should know.

Honestly it sounds like he treats you as his PA rather than his wife. I'm a football fan, I don't tend to go to games (too far from my team at the moment and it's expensive!) but I know when they're next playing. If he cares, he should know too. Stop taking responsibility for organising him. It doesn't sound like he's grateful!

He expects you to know when games are but doesn't know when there is a game that week himself? He's a dickhead. Delete the app- you aren't his PA, his expectation that you check his schedule would be laughable if I didn't have strong suspicions that we are probably talking about a nasty bully who kicks off in order bully you into doing everything for him.

Bollocks to that

He should know how own availability and stop arranging visits to his family, you're his partner not his mother

Wow, you have the app! Asking him should be sufficient and missing one game isn't going to kill him, he sounds like a stroppy teenager, why should you have to know the schedule of his hobby! The bloody cheek, delete the app ASAP and stop managing his schedule, you're not his PA, stand your ground or things will never change.

How can I get him to see he is being unreasonable? Major problem! He still thinks I should know when the games are!!?!! Augh!!!!

Thanks for the support as well! He's still making me think I should have checked :(