to think the current NHS guidelines for alcohol and breastfeeding are batshit and not conducive to long term breastfeeding

[lemonadey]

I was at a wedding on Saturday, I took 6m old dd but me and dh decided he would be the one "on shift" and I would have a few drinks as its been a while (dd is a bottle refuser) over the course of the day I drank quite a few glasses of prosecco (I didn't count but by the end of the day it probably amounted to about a bottle) but obviously still bf dd at points and I got pretty fed up of the amount of people quite openly shocked at me breastfeeding and drinking. I do get it, the nhs guidelines are basically the same as if you're pregnant even though the way alcohol transfers to the baby is completely different and the amount of alcohol that enters your breastmilk is negligible.

I just feel it is another way for women to feel like their life is "on hold" while breastfeeding, my mum breastfed me and said she never gave a second thought to what she ate or drank and it was a really enjoyable experience for her, it was part of her life, she never expressed or "pumped and dumped".

I wish more women realised you can still have a social life that includes drinking whilst breastfeeding, the current guidelines are so ridiculously strict and just result in judging from other people and unnecessary guilt for mum.

So tell me, AIBU??

there how about hair of the dog for your hangover?

Feminist twaddle

Of course I can't control your thoughts and have no wish to. But thoughts - and 'involuntary' shocked faces - don't occur in a vacuum. I am simply inviting you to consider the cultural context that invites mothers to risk assess differently depending on the type of toxin under discussion, and whether it really is as objective and science based as you seem to believe.

Which the op didn't do! Follow the guidelines that! She drank a bottle and fed her baby throughout the day.

Yes I agree with you on that one. I was just pointing out the fact that the NHS doesn't strictly say that alcohol is a complete 100% no go whilst breastfeeding.
I think anyone drinking a whole bottle of wine over the course of a finger day when they have a young child to look after is a questionable choice. I know the OPs DH was on Sober duty to do the child caring but OP still needed to be involved as she is bf. I have heard that a good rule is - safe to drive equals safe to breastfeed and nobody will be safe to drive if they drink an entire bottle of wine.
I'm not really in any position to be judging though as I myself have not been 100% alcohol free whilst breastfeeding.

Shame she can't have a banana - excellent for hangovers.

I'm thinking a dirty burger instead Booming.

Let me see?........ Just find me the facts of how many MILs of alcohol would kill me and how many kilos of bananas would kill me, and allow me weight up the risks.

I've never said op can't drink alcohol if she chooses (having weighed up the risks) just that she should be shocked that other people looked shocked. I wonder if she has a shocked look on her face at their shock?

Just as I have expressed no approbation for theres hangover. Her baby, her choices. Not only that, judging by the alcohol approval rating here, she could start her next days alcohol consumption now she is into another day?

there. Fat is always a good idea for soaking up alcohol

Good idea.

Trebles all round!

YANBU OP

i find that judgements about a mother's consumption of alcohol contribute to making a woman's experience of having and rearing a baby even more isolating than it already is.
I drank throughout pregnancy and BF - not huge amounts of course - but within and v occassionally slightly over the guidelines.

It made me feel like my life was normal, that nothing had really changed, that I could do what anyone else was doing, while still being able to feed my child.

Have you given up bananas while breastfeeding though?

I have, do I get a shiney star? I have also given up dairy and strawberries as my breastfed baby is allergic to them all and if I eat them he gets rashes on his skin, a sore bottom and mucous and sometimes blood in his stools. Giving up dairy is way harder than giving up alcohol. I crave cheesecake.

Forgot to add: the fact that dairy, Banana and strawberry pass through my milk and into baby's system shows me that what I consume passes into baby, hence I do feel guilty about my 3 glasses of wine.

I'm really puzzled. I'm reading the NHS breastfeeding and alcohol guidelines and they seem perfectly reasonable, not prescriptive and pretty vague as befits the evidence or lack thereof!

There's some evidence that regularly drinking more than two units of alcohol a day while breastfeeding may affect your baby's development. But an occasional drink is unlikely to harm your breastfed baby.

www.nhs.uk/Conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/Pages/breastfeeding-alcohol.aspx

OT. I feel society has come a long way from the 1950s and women are not oppressed. Unless you are saying government guidelines are mysoginist and oppressive, I just think society is never going to be truly equal. I would bet money it was the other women giving the shocked looks the OP complained about. So if women feel inclined to judge other women what hope is there?

"Let me see?........ Just find me the facts of how many MILs of alcohol would kill me and how many kilos of bananas would kill me, and allow me weight up the risks. "

Well breastfeeding while dead I'd imagine is pretty difficult, so probably not worth worrying about.

The principle is the same - just because something can cause damage in massive quantities does not mean that it will cause any damage, at all, in small quantities. This is not comparable to a virus. A virus is a living thing. Wine is not alive. It will not reproduce and increase in number in your body. A virus will do exactly that.

Our bodies (and our children's) absorb tiny quantities of things that could potentially poison us every single day.

YANBU

Good to see people explaining how much alcohol content is really present in breastmilk, barely any!

I ate bananas and peanuts and the odd glass of wine. I have never said anyone shouldn't, just not in excess (as in a bottle) and you can't expect everyone to approve.

It takes a very small amount of pure alcohol to kill someone, certainly not a huge amount! The fact remains it is a poison, just as nicotine is. They are classed as poisons so I would not want to consume an amount over the recommended daily intake in one day and breastfeed.

That's my choice and the OPs choice is her own.

YANBU.
Even if you are pissed as a fart your milk has less alcohol than fresh orange juice or overripe fruit. A six month old baby is weaning and probably regularly consumes fruit with more naturally occurring alcohol.

And here's he lady who tested her own milk. biologybrain-simonsays.blogspot.co.uk/2008/12/alcohol-content-of-breast-milk.html?m=1

If you think we've achieved a perfectly equal society these days then in my view you are not paying attention. That's another thread though.

For reasons I can't really fathom, it's not just men who seem to feel the need to break out extra helpings of sanctimony and judgement when it comes to pregnant women and new mothers. Women do it too. And? That doesn't mean it doesn't happen, or that it isn't a load of controlling and moralistic bollocks a lot of the time.

There's quite a lot of contemporary research into parenting culture and the way it develops. Health- and risk-based hectoring of and covert exertion of moral control on new mothers is a fairly new phenomenon and has been well documented. Its roots are complex and not a result of some kind of simplistic 'oppression' of women by men as you seem to be suggesting. It's still a valid and important topic for discussion, particularly if any subject that clusters 'risk, however minuscule, of harm to infant' together with 'any kind of enjoyment for mothers'.

But what is it about "people" that makes them think their approval is important? It's a strange one isn't it. I wouldn't approve if I saw someone beating their child in the street; o suspect most wouldn't. Beating your child is illegal and socially unacceptable.

Breastfeeding whilst boozing- well no one really knows what's going on there do they? They don't know how much the mother has had, over what time period etc.

I drank well over the recommended amount (as per NHS guidelines) when pregnant. However I did usually time drinks so they were spaced out. No one watching at cats bumming would have a clue would they? They wouldn't have a clue about the dangers of breastfeeding when drinking (pretty sure they're not thinking oh dear that baby might want to feed more and not sleep as well- (the only evidence based claim I have seen on this thread) are they? They're thinking irresponsible mother feeding her baby poison. And for that, they're a bit dim

Blooming I'm really starting to wonder about you. What hope is there when women judge other women?? That's exactly what you have done here! Someone once told me you can't argue with stupid. Clearly they were right.

Well over the recommended amount when breastfeeding sorry, but whilst pregnant. I kept to those guidelines

Blooming, if you see someone feeding pure alcohol to a baby, please feel free to look shocked and actually, ring the police.

That has nothing to do with this discussion.

OT, you're pretty much describing how I've felt since getting up duffed.

Think I'm going to get some laminated cards made up with some of this info on - to pass to people like Blooming when they scowl at me in restaurants etc next year.

I don't for one minute think we have achieved a fully equal society, far from it, but I would hope most mothers would have enough self esteem ignore other people's judgements on their parenting. I long ago decided I didn't give a shit about other people's opinions (the vast majority being women) of my children and me when it came to parenting.

Perhaps that's why I see a lot of feminist theories as twaddle. I hate being lectured about old fashioned societal values and I equally hate being lectured from the feminist viewpoint.

Maybe I am a hopeless case