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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To just want someone to be nice to me?

25 replies

QuestionableMouse · 29/04/2016 19:57

It's been a really shitty couple of weeks. I've been ill. Went back to work (probably a bit too early) and have been told off at least three times, all over stuff that isn't my fault.

It's my birthday today and no one has bought me anything (I'm not trying to be grabby or anything but something to open would have been nice.)

I'm my mums career and so live in the same house. She and dad have been out, then come back in and she's just had a go at me for 'sitting on my arse all day.'

Ive cried more times this week than I have in ages. I'm just so fed up of being everyone's punching bag. I don't think I'm asking for much, am I?

OP posts:
SparkleSoiree · 29/04/2016 19:59

Happy birthday to you! Flowers

Not asking too much to have a card or gift on your birthday and I'm surprised your mum hasn't been kinder today!

TheCatsMeow · 29/04/2016 19:59
Flowers

I'm sorry people are being shitty OP. I hope you feel better

gamerchick · 29/04/2016 20:01

Happy birthday Flowers

Maybe it's time your mother got herself another carer. So you can go off and make your own life and find some happy. You don't deserve to be treated like that.

FuzzyOwl · 29/04/2016 20:01

Happy Birthday Wine, Cake, Flowers and Chocolate. I'm sorry you have had such an awful time recently and no one has acknowledged today. You aren't asking for too much at all and I really hope everything improves soon for you.

Custardo · 29/04/2016 20:02

happy birthday

birthdays are shit - mines this weekend - its just shit isn't it?

happy birthday xx

FuzzyOwl · 29/04/2016 20:02

Maybe it's time your mother got herself another carer. So you can go off and make your own life and find some happy. You don't deserve to be treated like that.

^This

SallyMcgally · 29/04/2016 20:02

No you're not. Why is everyone being so horrible. Did you not even get anything from your parents? You'll get a load of people telling you that adult birthdays don't matter - well, yes they do. We all deserve to have one day in the year to feel a bit special and cherished and spoilt - especially if we've been ill, especially if we're carers and looking out for other people and especially if we've been shouted at for other peoples' mistakes. Did nobody give you a hug and apologise? Sounds like the people around you need to cop onto themselves a bit. You poor thing.
Go out tomorrow, take whatever you can afford out of the bank, and buy yourself a really special treat. In the meantime here's some CakeFlowersChocolate and Wine. And a Happy Birthday!

QuestionableMouse · 29/04/2016 20:03

Thank you. Reading it back it doesn't sound so much. Think I'm just feeling fed up with myself.

OP posts:
EponasWildDaughter · 29/04/2016 20:04

Why are you your mothers carer mouse?

Flowers Happy Birthday x

Pinkgeek · 29/04/2016 20:05

Lovely post Sally - totally agree.

Happy birthday op!! Cake

dottycat123 · 29/04/2016 20:05

Happy birthday, sorry your parents haven't bothered. Do try to think about you and what life you want.x

MyKingdomForBrie · 29/04/2016 20:05

I would in no way still be caring for someone who is so horrible on your birthday. Not even a present then has a go? Leave.

FuzzyOwl · 29/04/2016 20:07

Well said Sally.

decaman · 29/04/2016 20:09

Birthday Cake & Flowers for you.

QuestionableMouse · 29/04/2016 20:11

I'm crying again reading this. I got cards but that's it.

Work wise, I was told that my standards have slipped because I'm being lazy. Eh, no. I'm bloody knackered and I've been asking for help they won't provide. Also got into trouble for the time it took me to help a customer. (20mins, he had a lot of questions.)

Home wise my mum has been having a RA flare. I know that's what's causing her mood but it doesn't mean I feel better being on the receiving end.

OP posts:
TheCrimsonPleb · 29/04/2016 20:18

My DH has RA and I, his wife, do the caring. If your dad is on the scene why can't he be her carer? I know this isn't what you came on to discuss but it sounds like they might be taking the piss a bit here. If my son was caring for his Dad I would make sure he had a decent birthday.

Here FlowersWineCake

Don't let the bastards grind you down.

QuestionableMouse · 29/04/2016 20:43

My dad is unwell too and can't cope.

To be fair, normally my life is pretty good. It's just been a horrible few weeks.

OP posts:
Janecc · 29/04/2016 21:01

Happy birthday mouse. Go and have a lovely bubble bath or see if you can have a spa day or something indulgent just for you. No, you don't need to be putting up with this stuff. Hopefully you'll feel better next week at work - assuming you're not working over the weekend. Did your parents give you any money or just nothing? If it was nothing, I would tell them just how hurtful this is especially as you have given up part of your life for them. If they continue to disrespect you, I suggest you move out and let them get a paid carer. Maybe it's time mouse found her roar?

QuestionableMouse · 30/04/2016 20:45

Thank you. I'm feeling much happier today. :) Had a chat with Mum, she said sorry for biting my head off and we cleared the air.

OP posts:
FuzzyOwl · 30/04/2016 21:04

Glad you are happier today and your cleared things with your mum. Hope you have a lovely weekend. Smile

SallyMcgally · 30/04/2016 21:09

Oh good - enjoy the rest of your weekend!

LuisSuarezTeeth · 30/04/2016 21:10

Hi Mouse. Good to hear that you cleared the air x

Have you looked into getting some assistance with your parents' care?

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 30/04/2016 22:28

Your mum and dad have not bought you anything for your birthday. Theyve been out all day come back in and she has a pop at you for sitting on your arse. I'm not surprised you're feeling a bit melhoncoly.
(((((((((((((())))))))))))))) CakeWineWine

WellErrr · 30/04/2016 22:34

Happy birthday!! Cake

kippersyllabub · 30/04/2016 22:38

🎂🎉🍭 Happy Birthday. It sounds as though the day has been horrid. I hope the year brings improvement and growth for you 💐

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