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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not make an appointment to view a house where there was a murder

125 replies

bewilderedfish · 27/04/2016 21:25

We've been looking to buy a house in a particular area for a while and today a lovely house has come up for sale on right move within our budget (it does seem cheap for what it is so I was very excited).
The interior pics look beautiful, it's been refurbished inside and ticks all the boxes for us. DH and I were excited to call the estate agent tomorrow to book a viewing and I idly did a Google search of the address just for fun.
My stomach sank when It became obvious it's the house where a woman was murdered in a horrible arson attack 10 years ago. I remembered it clearly when I read the news reports.
The woman died on the stairs after being disturbed by the fire. The house was badly damaged as petrol had been put through the letterbox and lit. It's obviously been completely remodelled but Its put me right off.
I immediately said no, I wouldn't be going to see it. I could never live there. Not for any price.
I wouldn't sleep at night for reliving that woman's last moments and I'd never feel happy there. DH thinks I'm being ridiculous and he's really disappointed.
Am I being stupid?

OP posts:

GraysAnalogy · 28/04/2016 03:23

I'd like to say it wouldn't bother me because I see people die but I can't help but think it would probably play on my mind. YANBU

darkcorridors · 28/04/2016 06:26

In my old house (and it really was old!) we found a bundle of documents in the attic (deeds, birth and death certificates) and discovered that a couple of people had died in the house, and also several infants too there was also some murky details surrounding a child that was a baby who whose mother was one of the children of the original occupants house but was referred to as a sister in all the wills. Her mother had the baby out of wedlock and some years later drowned herself in the nearby bay. We did some research and made a family tree for them and found the gravestones in the nearby churchyard. All very sad, but really interesting. There were many many spooky unexplainable incidents over the years (before we'd found the documents), but it beer felt ominous and it never bothered me, but that's maybe because I could view the deaths as historical. Not sure how I would feel about a more recent death, especially such a horrific one. You're NBU I don't think.

Heyheyheygoodbye · 28/04/2016 06:51

Why don't you view it and see how you feel in the actual house? You can leave right away if you feel uncomfortable, but you might find actually being there is totally different to how you're imagining it.

Narp · 28/04/2016 06:55

I think I would go and look at it, and if I liked it, it wouldn't put me off.

OTOH, there are flats near here on the site where two children were killed in an arson attack about 10 years ago. I sometimes wonder if the people who live there now have any idea why those new flats were erected

MyBreadIsEggy · 28/04/2016 07:01

I think you've already made your decision. You obviously would be uncomfortable living there even if it turns the most perfect house that could have been a bespoke design for you - purely because you know someone died in horrible circumstances there.
Personally, I wouldn't let it put me off just going to look at the house - it happened 10 years ago, and the place has been remodelled.

Alexa444 · 28/04/2016 07:01

I think that's s bit silly tbh, its just a house. My nans house is very old and I have no doubt that many someones have died there. Who cares. People die everywhere, its just a place.

Inkanta · 28/04/2016 07:08

It could bother me, imagining that violent death on the stairs, particularly at night time - if I lived there.

AllThePrettySeahorses · 28/04/2016 07:11

I think the possible long-term problems from the fire would really put me off, tbh. Because of that, I wouldn't even look at the house.

LittleHouseOnTheShelf · 28/04/2016 07:23

We're house hunting at the moment, it would put me off a house. I know the chances are we have lived in a house where somebody has died but a murder is a whole different kettle of fish.

tobysmum77 · 28/04/2016 07:28

It's strange really considering the number of people who won't consider newbuild houses. Something awful has probably happened in most Victorian properties.

But you have to live their op so yanbu

VilootShesCute · 28/04/2016 07:32

YANBU. I'd rather live with my in laws than in a house that someone had suffered like that in.

sn1ce · 28/04/2016 07:32

Regardless of how I felt personally about the house, the information about the murder would affect future sales and so for that reason I wouldn't buy it

Skittlesss · 28/04/2016 07:43

The possible impact of the fire damage would put me off straight away.

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. Ignore the people referring to you as being silly. Everyone is allowed their own feelings about a house like this and ultimately you are the one who will live there. You need to be happy about your new home :)

Goingtobeawesome · 28/04/2016 07:43

To stop any if only feelings I would consider going to view the house and see how you feel then.

Goingtobeawesome · 28/04/2016 07:46

It's a silly argument to say you could be walking on a grave at any time or someone could have been murdered in your kitchen. The point is the OP knows that someone has died there. she doesn't know that someone might have died in her local shop or workplace so has no issue being there.

SoupDragon · 28/04/2016 07:50

The murder wouldn't put me off,the fire damage would.

Trills · 28/04/2016 07:54

I fully support you in your decision to reject this house.

If you feel weird then you feel weird.

It leaves more houses for people like me, who don't care one bit about this sort of thing.

NarcyCow · 28/04/2016 08:05

There's a house in an area we're looking at where a woman was brutally stabbed. It's been boarded up since as no-one will live in it. I'm pretty certain I could get my head around living in it but I wouldn't want my kids to grow up living in 'the murder house', and there's no way you could hide it from them - all their friends would know.

MattDillonsPants · 28/04/2016 08:16

My last flat had been the scene of a brutal stabbing. A young man died in my hallway.

It was a weird flat but I couldn't refuse it as it was a council fat and we were almost homeless!

I was happy there for a year though OP and never really thought about it while there.

RedToothBrush · 28/04/2016 08:18

It only bothers you because you KNOW something.

You can never properly KNOW what has happened in a house or the grounds it was built before you own it.

You can forever go round in circles with it.

Ultimately, can you afford to be scared of nothing?

BitOutOfPractice · 28/04/2016 08:25

I grew up near to Yew Tree Farm where the terrible murder of Carl Bridgewater took place. It stood empty for years and years afterwards but has now been bought and, from what I can see as I drive past, rather beautifully refurbished.

The story of what happened to Carl really terrified me as a child so I don't think I could ever live there. But I'm not sure that the house you are talking about would bother me tbh

Tartsamazeballs · 28/04/2016 08:31

YNBU. It's bad juju!

Not everyone need agree though, and more power to them to pick up a bargain house. I personally couldn't. There's a maisonette round here where a dad murdered his wife and two kids about 20 years ago, and 10 year old me was shocked that anyone would want to move into that flat, which was rented back out 4 months after.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 28/04/2016 08:48

its interesting that the houses of Fred West, Aprils Murderer, and Tia Sharpes murder have all been demolished- so clearly at some official level it was decided it was more than bad juju (love that phrase)

whois · 28/04/2016 08:56

I think you're being silly, but you can't help how you feel!

whois · 28/04/2016 08:58

What about historical deaths? Like in grand old houses there have often been lots of deaths - would that bother you or just recent ones?

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