AIBU to wish plus size skinny jeans would F off

[Elle80]

I want some new jeans, I'm plus size, all I can find are skinny jeans destined to make my legs look like two turkey drum sticks. Why retailers? Why?!

That's great thanks Mango!

Aero no fucker is going to look at me and think "Yer sneaky bitch yer. There's me eyeing up a fine arse under all those layers of clothes and now I see the real cut of yer I'm shocked!" Then again that's exactly how I snared dh except shoe wise. He tells everyone that I took my shoes off and dropped 5 inches. :o