To think it wasn't my fault that her coat got dirty

[NatureRun]

In a busy coffee shop with 8-month-old DS and our NCT group. A woman pulled an extra chair up to join her friends at crowded table next to us. She sat down within grabbing range of DS and before I could stop him he twisted round in highchair and grabbed hold of her pale grey coatigan thing that she'd draped over chair and wiped his mouth on it He had prune puree and yogurt around his mouth as I was feeding him

Woman jumped up angrily and told me off. I apologised profusely but she was really angry. She insisted I pay for dry-cleaning. I refused (had she been nicer I may have offered) but she was making a scene and I loathed her.

If you sit within grabbing distance of a prune-covered baby surely that's not my fault? Or am I BU?

[MistressMerryWeather]

Are coatigans are a thing now?

[HazelBite]

You are being very unreasonable, your child your responsibility to watch, before she even had a chance to get going with her rant I would have offered to pay for the dry cleaning.

[MistressMerryWeather]

Oh no, I've just Goggled.

Did it have an Aztec pattern? :o

[cavedescreux]

Sorry but this is hilarious 😆 It's the combo of the "pale grey coatigan" and the prune purée ... Seriously though, If you apologised profusely and she was still rude and shouty, I don't think you were unreasonable in not offering to pay. It was silly of her to sit so close to a yoghurty baby, but not everyone knows that. But clothes do get dirty out and out and about you have to accept that.

[Esmeismyhero]

She's being very unreasonable wearing a coatigan lol its it like a coat and cardigan mashed together? Like those designer dogs that are actually just mongrels?

[FishWithABicycle]

Any baby in a high chair has a 3 foot danger-zone radius around them within which any item or person is pretty much going to get spattered (with a medium-risk zone extending to at least 10 foot depending on the baby). Yanbu - she chose to sit right next to a high chair.

[gamerchick]

Before this thread nudges closer to the twilight zone it was an accident, shit happens and an apology was enough.

People are so angry these days.

[ScarletForYa]

Yanbu.

It's one of those unfortunate things. It's a baby, how were you supposed to stop him?

To be honest her attitude would have got my back up straight away. Being angry and rude about a baby is pathetic. And telling you off is wrong.

It's be different if it was a naughty act done deliberately by an older child.

[GinAndColonic]

I think this is one where you live in a bubble you are with a baby 24/7 so of course you know that babies make a mess when they're eating. Who could possibly sit next to a messy baby and not realise.

I've been out of that bubble for a while now and, you do forget (mercifully)

I'm a little struggling because I wouldn't really want to pay for dry cleaning but then again it wasn't the lady's fault at all and your baby wiped his face on her clothes, which is much worse than flinging the spoon around and flicking a bit of yoghurt on or throwing a teacake at her. A few years ago my DS showered a nearby table with peas. Mortifying but fairly clean at least.

[Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost]

Ynbu. It was no one's fault. Just an accident, and you apologised.

Damaging property oyster. Its a coat that can be cleaned. Youd think he was running around smashing up cars. He's an 8 month old baby. With the best will in the world you can't stop babies reaching out ect. I bet even Jesus Christ made a mess as a baby.
I personally think the women behaved in a threatening manner, tbh.

[IAmTheWhoreOfBabylon]

I think she to blame
You were already there. Who would put something within reach of a baby. Are you expected to strap their arms down?

[cavedescreux]

Sorry but you don't "live in a bubble" because you have a baby. Babies are humans and part of society like the rest of us. If you live in a world of pale grey coatigans floating around where you only interact with adults and nothing gets dirty - that's the bubble in my view!

[ScarletForYa]

Totally agree FishWithABicycle

And coatigans are horrible anyway.

[MistressMerryWeather]

If you live in a world of pale grey coatigans

The horror.

[StealthPolarBear]

Where do I get one of these babies that wipes its own mouth unprompted? I have a 9 and 6 year old and they're still working on it :o

[Katastrophe13]

I don't think it was anyone's fault really, just one of those things. If the woman isn't used to babies she wouldn't think to keep her distance. But you couldn't have been expected to anticipate and prevent what happened when it was to fast. I am laughing my head off at the image of your ds seeing her coatigan and thinking 'ah facecloth!' And going in for a wipe I would have been annoyed if I was the woman, but not enough to rant and rave at you. Also think in your shoes I would not have offered to pay after being yelled at.

[Veterinari]

To don't have a baby. But I do have a dog if I was sitting on a park bench for example and someone sat next to me and my dog and my dog then proceeded to slobber over their clothes, I'm pretty sure I'd be told to watch my dog more closely/not take it out in public etc. By the same token I expect to be able to sit in a cafe and not have my clothing smeared with baby drool.

It's not up to other people to accommodate your child, it's up to you to be responsible for their actions until their old enough. Yes it was an accident, but the result of that accident is damage to someone else's property, and you need to take responsibility for that

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

Stupid woman. She walked into the space your baby was already ccupying. He was being fed...hardly takes a brain surgeon to avoid getting too close if you don't want to get food on you. If she had been seated first I'd have said that it was your fault for putting him too close to her, but you & DS were there first, he was restrained in a high chair, it's not difficult to give him ample berth.

Your apology was more than enough for HER stupidity.

[redskirt3]

Hehe I think it's funny (but I have a naughty toddler so a skewed perspective! ). I wouldn't have paid for dry cleaning either.

[ohtheholidays]

YWBU because you expected her to know that your baby might do that to her coat and she had the right to sit where she wanted to.

She was in the wrong as well for shouting at you,she shouldn't have done that.
But I would have offered to pay for the coat to be cleaned as soon as it happened.

[BertrandRussell]

Not your fault- but your responsibility.

You should have offered to pay for cleaning.

[MissingPanda]

Agree with gamerchick

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

So, Veterinari, if you are out walking with your dog on a lead and he's wet & muddy and I walk right up to him, getting mud on my clothes, then shouted at you, you'd pay my dry cleaning bill?

Or, would you think FFS my dog is on a LEAD and you walked up to him, pay your own dry cleaning bill?!