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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In thinking about bariatric surgery?

151 replies

cheekymonk · 16/04/2016 16:36

I am 37. Weigh 28 stone with a BMI of 58. My Mum describes me as greedy as a baby. I was noticeably overweight from age 7. I was bullied for my size in secondary school. I was size 20 at 12. I was an 18 in year 11 then got bigger, at Uni being a 26. I have tried most diets and been most successful with WEight watchers when I lost 8 stone and was my lowest weight for years at 17 stone. However we moved house, found out both DS and DD had Autism and I lost it from there so am now 28 stone. I have been going to the priory for weekly cbt sessions and whilst me eating is better I am not losing weight. I struggle to walk and am forever scared of breaking furniture. I am scared for my health. DD is 5 and DS is 11. AIBU in considering surgery? I do have a lovely DH btw.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 16/04/2016 16:37

Do it. Flowers

Glassofwineneeded · 16/04/2016 16:39

You're not BU for considering all the options. Any surgery has risks though. Talk to your GP who will refer you to the specialists and take it from there.

MadameJosephine · 16/04/2016 16:42

Not at all, investigate all your options and if you think it's right for you and your family go for it. My brother had a gastric sleeve operation several years ago and has lost a substantial amount of weight ( probably about ten stone but he doesn't like to talk about it) and he is like a new man now.

Blueberry234 · 16/04/2016 16:43

I had it I have zero regrets it is not an easy decision or an easy way out. Still requires willpower and meal planning. Do your research the WLSinfo site is excellent

tupperwareAARGGH · 16/04/2016 16:43

I would do it. I had a friend that did it as she was much lighter than you and it has improved her quality of life no end. She no longer needs her back operated on!

Be prepared for the loose skin though and so I would start saving to have that operation. You have young children and they need you to be there for them. I am only 3 stone overweight and I feel unable to run around with my DS as I should.

PinotAndPlaydough · 16/04/2016 16:45

I did it at 24st, one of the best things I've done. I've lost 7st so far and have a long way to go still. It's been a long hard journey and my weight loss has been slower than I would have liked because of two pregnancies and a surgery which impacted on it. However I'm back on track and steadily loosing weight and have had a huge shift in how I view and consume food.
My only word of warning is that it's not the easy option, it still requires a degree of willpower and sensible choices.

StealthPolarBear · 16/04/2016 16:47

Blue if you don't mind me asking, if it needs willpower etc how does that work any better? Surely the people who've had it are the ones for whom that has failed?
Feel free to not respond.

Original poster
cheekymonk · 16/04/2016 16:48

Thank you all. I don't know how I will fare with trying to get it on NHS? We haven't got that kind of money. I booked a docs appt a few weeks ago and he just said that I've done it before and can do it again! Hmm

OP posts:
TheVeryThing · 16/04/2016 16:48

Someone close to me had it last year and it has been life changing for her. Within weeks her blood pressure was back to normal and she is no longer pre-diabetic.
if it is feasible for you I would say do it.
For people who are obese, it is extremely difficult to lose weight by other means, and to keep it off.

reup · 16/04/2016 16:49

Have you got type 2 diabetes? They are doing a study into obesity and type 2 in London and Southampton if you are near either of them. Some of the people have a temporary bariatric device called an endobarrier.

Original poster
cheekymonk · 16/04/2016 16:49

I know it isn't an easy option and still requires willpower. I have heard of people liquidising KFC Shock

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekymonk · 16/04/2016 16:50

Am in the Midlands

OP posts:
Original poster
cheekymonk · 16/04/2016 16:51

No to the diabetes, thankfully and miraculously.

OP posts:
IHadAGastricBand · 16/04/2016 16:56

Don't get a band, is my advice!

However, sleeves have a good outcome but unfortunately I think they might consider you too high risk at your current weight.

PinotAndPlaydough · 16/04/2016 16:56

Some private companies do a payment plan, might be worth considering.

Blueberry234 · 16/04/2016 16:57

You have to completely rethink how you approach food, they looked into my issues with food which was portion control so I opted for the sleeve, therefore I have to get into me what is better in the right order so protein, veg then carbs. I cannot eat much at all I have good restriction therefore it had been successful for me however if you snack and graze and choose the wrong foods then you can 'cheat' still. For instance I had a baby snacked on crap, have fallen into the habit of a couple glasses of wine and a stone and a bit has gone back on. If your issues are sweet things then a bypass may be better as eating sweet things and fatty things can cause a pleasant condition called dumping syndrome. WLSinfo is a great place for more research

Blueberry234 · 16/04/2016 17:18

Just re read dumping syndrome is not pleasant

lljkk · 16/04/2016 17:22

A relative had this ~18 yrs ago & it must have saved her life. She had rapidly worsening T2 diabetes. She has kept her weight down to something just slightly over pudgy.

But she's had life threatening problems from it, too. In my mind it really is a last ditch tried absolutely everything else type option.

Toomanycats99 · 16/04/2016 17:29

It is not an easy option. My sister had a gastric bypass and to be honest it has emphasised a lot of other serious physiological issues. I think you need to understand why you over eat, she overate to get comfort with other issues and when she had the surgery she couldn't do that so the other issues then came to the fore. To be honest it has caused more problems than it has solved. There are also a lot of restrictions on eating and drinking at the same time and she has to have tablets before she eats anything which requires pre planning. She can only eat small amounts so she finds going out for a meal an issue as obviously she feels she ends up paying lots to not eat much! I believe she should have had far more counselling before having it done than she did, if she had they may not have agreed to operate.

takemetomars · 16/04/2016 17:38

First step- find out if this is available in your area on the NHS.
Next step - research, lots of it, to determine which surgery you think would suit you best.
Consider a loan if not available on NHS or if you decide on a sleeve gastrectomy ( not available on the NHS).
I had a sleeve gastrectomy nearly 5 years ago, if you want to know why I chose this surgery I am happy to discuss it further with you privately.
DO NOT HAVE A GASTRIC BAND. Waste of money.
This is possibly the best 8 grand I have ever spent. i lost enough weight to allow me to MOVE and exercise. I am still losing weight 5 years out (unusual). It has completely cahnged how I think, feel, view food and for the first time in 45 years I feel 'normal' about food. You can't put a price on that.

Toomanycats99 · 16/04/2016 17:39

Sorry - just realised how that might read. I'm not implying you do have any issues just that she did and we didn't realise until it was too late.

takemetomars · 16/04/2016 17:39

I am a nurse btw and my medical knowledge had a significant influence on my choice of surgery, far more so than the research I did (which was minimal)

QOD · 16/04/2016 17:40

I'm just off out but had it.
if your bmi is 50 + you should qualify on nhs

Get thee to your gp

Ask any questions. My Gastric bypass was 5 yrs old on Tuesday

Potatoface2 · 16/04/2016 18:00

theres a strict criteria you have to meet to get bariatric surgery on the NHS....its not as easy as it used to be....there will be a long wait if you are successful in being referred and there are certain things you will have to do to be eligible....you have to be strict with yourself for it to be successful too...theres no point having it if you think liquidising mars bars or kfc isnt cheating....you have to maintain an eating programme following it...it is NOT an easy option...also as someone else has said loosing the weight rapidly often leaves excess skin which can cause other problems and the removal of this skin is not available on the NHS. Look into this thoroughly before you decide