To envy the joy that football fans feel? (For example) I don't think I feel 'ecstatic' about anything

[CoffeeAddictionUnderway]

Just watched DH absolutely beside himself because his football team won some 'important' match.

My feeling - envy. Envy that he and all the fans on the TV seemed so utterly consumed with joy.

I honestly don't think I ever feel like this. I actually googled once to see if I had inadequate dopamine receptors .

AIBU to feel envious (not of the football...just the joy)? What can I do to bring more joy to my life? What brings you joy?

(Unfortunately, we're having fertility issues and not managed to have children to date, so if your answers could maybe avoid things involving finding joy in your kids just to humour me that would be great - or I might start to feel really depressed!).

One of the best nights out was the 96 Euro matches in Birmingham. Scotland vs Holland. Men in kilts everywhere, it was an amazing night. I do follow football, I also experience extreme euphoria when scum Utd lose. Footie fans will know who I mean.

My DS has just whooped because he has just got an achievement in a video game he plays. I am a gamer and feel the same, I'm close to getting an achievement in a game. I'm in the top 18% worldwide for this part of the game. Plus as a woman being good in a game when gaming is dominated by men does give me satisfaction. A few men cannot handle being beaten by a woman, they are sweet victories indeed.

Nothing much compares when your team does something special, I feel sorry for those who don't go through the emotions of football, to not know what it feels like. I don't even think every football fan experiences it though, there are some special, and not so special clubs.

Anything to do with tom hardy gets me pretty beside myself

When I see my dog running after a tennis ball and bringing it back. She's so fast and so determined. Always makes me smile.

Singing and dancing also good.

Sport brings me lots of excitement and joy. Football is more about the story and the league position- as to be fair the 90minutes of actual play is often DEATHLY boring.

I got really into the Olympics which is coming round again. Benefit is that unlike football, coverage is pitched at a total newbie level and doesn't assume lots of prior knowledge. Watching Mo Farah et al in 2012 was elating and i can't wait to watch this year's competition

I'm exactly the same but I take anti-depressants so I do feel that my emotions aren't extreme.

I'd love to feel extreme joy or that squeeze kind of excitement people get. I get generally enjoying myself and I do laugh but just don't feel any euphoria or anything.

Apparently music can increase sensations of euphoria?

I meant squee.

Most football fans don't get any feelings of joy / ectasy to envy

It's rugby for me. When Wales beat England in the group stage of the World Cup my husband, our friends, and I danced in the living room for about half an hour. Whooping, hugging, replying vital bits of the match. Utter, utter joy.
The flip side of this is the tears I shed when we lost to South Africa in the quarter finals. True allegiance to a sports team is a blessing and curse.

I know what you mean OP. DH is a massive football fan and it he gets so consumed by it. I am missing whatever it is that makes you find sport enjoyable. I just cannot concentrate on it for very long, a sprint or penalties is my limit, but even then I don't have any kind of allegiance with the winning team or athlete so I don't get the buzz from watching.

OP - go and see the film 'Eddie the eagle Edwards' - a feel good film and we all left fizzing at the end! It's on at the cinema now.

It's a shared angst (will they / won't they) resulting in a shared euphoria with sport I think. I've never managed to feel it with football or rugby even when I dutifully watched the All Blacks in every televised game with my sons.

I find that sense of slight anxiety followed by total exhilaration with martial arts - took karate up as a hobby aged 40 and love every class. I leave on a total very smiley high after every session and then every few months (now years as I've slowly advanced through the belt colours) there is a grading - where you are on edge, anxious, working hard and then completely euphoric when you pass. I am not that touchy-feely but I hug everyone in the lineup after a grading :) even if it's not me grading, the atmosphere in the dojo is electric after some of the higher belt colours have given their all and survived it.

It also involves a meditation / spiritual aspect which has really got me appreciating the smaller things. So finding joy in a sunrise, finding joy when I have grown cucumbers that taste delicious from seed (adore my garden), finding joy in my gorgeous boys and really appreciating my life.

I do agree with dancing, singing, some kind of challenging exercise like Spin or Zumba. Listen to music you love really really really loudly. You might not feel 'euphoric' but I promise you will feel a buzz.

You do have to make things happen (not saying that critically) if you are flatlining.

Also go out and get pissed and go clubbing with some old friends! Properly let loose every now and then

Music is definitely mine. Me and my best mate follow our favourite band and for 2 hours I'm completely immersed in the show and squeal and shout like a loon.

My Aunty said it was sad that I spend so much money doing it. I just feel- a bit like you seem to OP that it's sad she doesn't have something that excites her so much. Doesn't have to be football or music but that feeling of being immersed in something is revitalising.

I'm usually pretty level feelings wise, not very excitable but I find joy in:

Singing, whether it's in the house or belting out a hymn at church (it's really therapeutic whether you believe or not).
Driving through Glencoe.
Walking the dog through some beautiful countryside and just taking a minute to look around.
Looking up at the stars on a clear night.
When my cherry blossom trees flower even if they only last a couple of weeks.
The odd sunny day we get here, everyone is so happy it's infectious.
Spring flowers as they remind me winters over

I know what you mean op. I have been to horse racing occasionally & love the rumbling excitement from the crowd as the horses get closer to the finish. Never feel it myself - maybe cos I only bet small amounts. I've done some of the feel good stuff on the list and yeah, it feels good, but not sure I've ever reached that euphoria. Think maybe it's about extremes. You only reach the pinnacle in situations where you can also experience crushing disappointment. So maybe we should be happy with our happy medium lives.

It's live music and theatre for me. It's an expensive hobby but one of the few things that gives me a buzz so I spend my money on it.

What about getting a pet?

If you like animals then there is nothing to rival the joy of getting a puppy or kitten or bringing a rescue home. They're the gift that keeps giving with their silly little antics and there's a lot of joy in watching their characters develop....

I get excited by lots of things .

Football is a definite.

Also I go to lots of theatre/gigs/art galleries. That often makes my heart sing or hurt.

But then I can get the same about books, poetry, movies, TV shows...I find it very easy to make a connection with characters, places, ideas etc and it's that connection that generates emotion.

Some people find it harder to make that connection. My DH has to work at it much harder than me. He doesn't invest like I do, or at least as easily. At least in terms of art/performance/literature. Football is a different matter.

Obviously I'm not considering family and friends in this.

I would not like to be a football fan because I find football too much of a snore fest compared to other sports due to the constant frustration of low scoring. Rugby is much more exciting from that perspective however there are other Irish sports which I love even more but I doubt they will ever interest you . You would be surprised how easy it can be to become interested in a sport, for example in Ireland the second anyone puts a green jersey on with any hope of winning anything the entire country stops and holds baited breadth.

So pleased to see more ideas.

Funnily enough I went to a gig last night (mindful of this thread). And had an ace time. The vodka probably helped too

I might try and get an iPod again. Or do people just listen to music on their iPhones these days? (A proper help the aged question.)

Yes Alley soccer seems so slow when you're used to watching Gaelic! We are a sports mad house here so there's always a game of some sort on the telly. I'm dying to see the tennis today.

Coffee your nn reminds me that I can get a bit over-excited about coffee. DH has just brought me a massive mug full in bed, and whiling away a weekend morning over papers and coffee in a nice local caff brings me great joy. I find I get a greater sense of accomplishment in achieving small things, like finishing a really good book, having a clean kitchen floor, wrapping a present really nicely, or getting to the bottom of the washing basket. I find big stuff can be overwhelming and stressful and too bound up in other people's expectations.

That's so well put clock, that's exactly how I feel. I take more joy from little things than big occasions.