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AIBU?

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Original poster

Annual zoo pass for DC, aibu?

92 replies

Fura · 09/04/2016 10:31

Ex mil bought an annual zoo pass for each DC.

They would really like to go today so I have asked ex h for their passes but he is refusing as they were bought for him to use with DC by his mother.

I don't really want to pay again for them when they each have an annual pass in their name already, Aibu?

OP posts:
lljkk · 09/04/2016 19:21

I'd say feck all but prepare an emotionaless response when you get tirade of angry phone calls or texts.

Original poster
Fura · 09/04/2016 19:26

On a brighter note arrived home only to receive a bottle of Moët from the co op insurance for moving house!

OP posts:
NataliaOsipova · 09/04/2016 20:16

I've just caught up with this. Jesus God - they put a note on your file???! I would go apeshit with the zoo - and your ex - about that, I really would. Must be a data protection nightmare, if nothing else. As another poster said, the cards belong to the kids - it means that they are allowed to go in (and not some other children). It certainly doesn't mean they are only allowed to go in with one specific person. Apart from anything else, is it their present or not - or just a way of subbing your ex's contact with them? If it's the latter, them surely it's really a gift for him and it's therefore inappropriate for it to be "given" to them? Plus - not sure how old your kids are - but how small must that make him look in their eyes? Beggars belief.

Glad they let you in - hope you had a super time when you were in there!

Veryflummoxed · 09/04/2016 20:29

So not a misunderstanding then. Sorry OP

MidniteScribbler · 09/04/2016 23:41

What a dick.

AmyGDalae · 10/04/2016 00:04

Hm, from your post it does sounds like he's a bit horrid.

But I was wonderin any chance that these are new passes that MiL and Ex haven't yet taken the kids themselves? Or that they had a trip to the zoo planned for the weekend?

Original poster
Fura · 10/04/2016 09:07

They went last weekend so they have been used.

Mil paid as a late Christmas present but ex has set up a direct debit according to the computer so pays every month for himself plus 3 children.

(Obviously I'd be more than happy to pay for myself!)

OP posts:
CalleighDoodle · 10/04/2016 09:24

Im amazed ag the lengths people are going to in order to try to make the ex sound less like a twat.

Op what Re the options surrounding the owed maintenance? Is that an arrandment through the court? And the random collection times? Can you make your solicitor aware and start a way to get it? Or whatever the csa is these days? If he is going to continue tobe an arse you need to have all his twattish behaviour made a note of.

Original poster
Fura · 10/04/2016 09:32

I went to the CMS (new CSA) the other week and it's all getting processed officially.

He owes money from a while back when I had DC a lot more. He should have been paying more anyway due to the amount of overtime he does but I've let that one go .... Hmm

He was supposed to have today with DC at the arranged time of 10am but has just messaged me to say he will be free at 1:30, as arranged - no it wasn't AngryAngryAngry

OP posts:
Original poster
Fura · 10/04/2016 09:32

I think I'm going to have to let go of of any maintenance owed as CMS cannot backdate.

OP posts:
AyeAmarok · 10/04/2016 09:44

Gid he sounds so frustrating!

Do you even bother to text back saying "the arrangement was 1030" when he does this? Do you make arrangements via email so it's in writing, or is it verbally? If verbally, start communicating only by email so you have proof of his unreasonableness.

Clutterbugsmum · 10/04/2016 10:21

Text back and tell him children will be available at the agreed time of 10.30am and you will be out for the rest of the day, and he will have to wait until his next contact time to see them.

Stop waiting around for him, if he's not there at agreed time, use text or E mail do agree verbally. If he tells you at time immediately text him back with agreed time and the date he agreed.

Hidinginplainsite · 10/04/2016 10:24

OP you could be me! My MIL bought the DC zoo passes which stay at their dads house.

We're not allowed to use them either. Wtf is it with zoos?!

Original poster
Fura · 10/04/2016 10:57

He hasn't replied. I messaged him back straight away explaining what the agreed time was. No reply.

He is taking me to court to fight for 50/50 custody.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fura · 10/04/2016 10:58

Just awful isn't it Hiding?! What did you do or do you just not take them?

OP posts:
CalleighDoodle · 10/04/2016 11:05

hiding zoos are an easy day out. Enclosed safe no thinkinng envolved. Thats why i had two years of annual passes! One less rhing to worrk about with a toddler and newborn!

Youarentkiddingme · 10/04/2016 11:34

Fura do you have any texts confirming what time he would come before he changed it? Would be worthwhile doing that in future. It's possible to do without him realising you are keeping a record. Eg "that's great. See you 10am Sunday."

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