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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think everyone should mind their own business about my nose job?

40 replies

oxfordyvonne · 07/04/2016 20:15

Yesterday I went and got a non-surgical nose job which I had been looking into for about a year now. This was something that I received just on the side of my nose which is the area I had problems with due to a small bump. I did not wish to have a full rhinoplasty procedure because of the nature of my self-conscious concern. Such a huge difference has been made and I could not recommend the procedure enough but people in the workplace have commented and had problems with things I choose to do with my own face which is outrageous.

One woman in particular is being vitriolic about it all, saying that I would rather spend money on my appearance than my children which is outright ridiculous as my children are both in their teens now and I have always put them before myself. She has also said to my face that it "wasn't worth it" and I "looked better before". On top of this, she keeps tagging me on Facebook posts about natural beauty and learning to love yourself. I am furious.

Any advice on how to deal with this?

OP posts:
Champagneformyrealfriends · 07/04/2016 20:19

Well I'd just tell them to fuck off, but that probably isn't helpful advice Blush

ilovesooty · 07/04/2016 20:21

If my colleagues were like this I'd be challenging them, reporting them to my line manager or looking for another job.

whois · 07/04/2016 20:22

Wow what's her problem?!? Unfriend on FB and maybe just reply "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" to her when she tries to say stuff in person.

ImperialBlether · 07/04/2016 20:23

Hang on, you had the nose job yesterday but today you're back at work and she's already slagging you off on Facebook?

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe · 07/04/2016 20:24

I would block her on fb then make make a bitchy comment about her needing surgery every time she mentioned it and ignore the rest Grin

FlyChickie · 07/04/2016 20:24

Tell her to fuck off and keep HER nose out of your business!

Justmeagain78 · 07/04/2016 20:25

She doesn't have to approve of these procedures but the strength of her reaction suggests that you've touched a bit of a nerve in her and that's for her to deal with not you. Just ignore the passive aggressive Facebook shit and if she says any more to you just smile in her face and ask her why she cares so much.

I'm pleased for you and for what it's worth - you can be a good mum without being a martyr. You're allowed to spend money on your own wellbeing.

NotSpartacus · 07/04/2016 20:25

Will telling them to fuck off be career limiting?

How about cutting her off on FB etc and spending your time glorying in your lovely new nose? Don't let other people vampires take the shine from something that makes you happy. I sound like my mum circa 1983, but she must be very unhappy to get so nasty about something that is none of her business.

NameAgeLocation · 07/04/2016 20:25

How did they even notice? I had rhinoplasty and people said things like, "Have you got new glasses?" Grin

Salmiak · 07/04/2016 20:25

Call her out on her behaviour next time she says anything to you - say it's your body and your face, her comments are unsolicited, rude, and upsetting for you and you'd appreciate it if it stops.

If it continues then have a chat with your manager saying she's bullying you.

curren · 07/04/2016 20:27

How many things has she tagged you in since in one day?

Sparklingbrook · 07/04/2016 20:28

Do people really notice other people's noses? Confused

Original poster
oxfordyvonne · 07/04/2016 20:30

Glad you're all agreeing that she's being a bit of a bitch, I was afraid some of you may see where she's coming from! We are definitely not friends and never have been, in fact she has no friends in the office and has quite the reputation for not watching her mouth.. has caused a lot of trouble recently with a friend of mine but that's a whole other story. Nobody wants to oppose her however as she holds a lot of power in the company for a reason I won't go into which complicates things further

ImperialBlether - a non surgical nose job is very simple and there's no recovery needed at all! I was in and out Grin

OP posts:
wowbutter · 07/04/2016 20:32

I have had a full blown rhinoplasty, I have had a lot of criticism. Does it bother me? Nope.
My father in law asked why I spent five grand for a nose "like that!?" And didn't I want a perfect one for that money?
I was actually very rude back to him and he hasn't mentioned it since.
I do love myself, which is why I had the surgery, to help. I haven't had any other surgery and probably won't. I was a shell of a person before, now I a, able to be myself. And I don't look like a man anymore.
Please don't let her bother you, you made the right choice xxx

Original poster
oxfordyvonne · 07/04/2016 20:32

In my opinion it's somewhat of a jealousy thing as people were giving me more attention than her today.. Hmm

OP posts:
ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets · 07/04/2016 20:35

"If I was a very rude person, I might tell you to fuck off and mind your own business"

My new favourite phrase. You haven't actually told her to F off, but the words are there Grin

Chala86 · 07/04/2016 20:40

YANBU Do what makes you happy and screw everyone that disagrees. Your body your choice.

runningincircles12 · 07/04/2016 20:42

Good for you. Tell her to get bent.

ilovesooty · 07/04/2016 20:43

In my opinion it's somewhat of a jealousy thing as people were giving me more attention than her today

This sounds like a very strange workplace.

NameAgeLocation · 10/04/2016 08:21

High five wowbutter!

A lot of people seem to believe that rhinoplasty involves getting any nose you like, regardless of the raw materials the surgeon has to work with.

Nobody would ever guess I'd had a nose job because my nose is frankly not all that Grin But it is improved, and I'm happy with it. I'm very glad I had it done.

I also don't expect to have further cosmetic surgery in the future.

OP your colleague has a few problems herself if she's so concerned about what you do with your own nose!

JeanSeberg · 10/04/2016 08:24

What's the hierarchy here? Same team? Same manager? Bollocks to being spoken to like that at work, I'd be involving HR.

Catmuffin · 10/04/2016 08:32

What does a non surgical nose job involve? I've had a full nose job in the past. The woman sounds ridiculous.

StillYummy · 10/04/2016 08:35

I would go strait to hr. Completely unacceptable.

Savagebeauty · 10/04/2016 08:40

What a bitch.. Buy some ridiculously fake boobs and wear them next week. See what she says about that.

I would rather spend money on my appearance than the children Grin

DailyFailAreABunchOfCunts · 10/04/2016 08:43

In respect of the comments - "Mind your own business"

In respect of the cow at work - "It's none of your business" followed by a swift de-friending on FB.