He is your Child's father not some sort of hired help!

[ConfuciousSayWhat]

If I see one more person referring to their other half as 'babysitting' or 'looking after' their child I think I may let out a little rage noise! He's the Child's father. His role is that of a parent. If you're poorly you shouldn't be thanking him for stepping in to look after said child, he should be doing it because it's what he signed up for when he got you pregnant!

I know I'm going to get flamed for this but it's been annoying me for a while now

That Twitter account Man who has it all has had me chuckling this morning.

MEN! Accentuate parts of your body you like, e.g. soft curves to draw attention away from problem areas, e.g. grating voice

It does go both ways, I've seen plenty of women refer to caring for their own child as child minding and even posts telling them to bill their husbands as they are doing what a nanny would

I have only ever seen this (or said it myself) when talking to a SAHP who is being either financially abused or treated as if she makes no valid contribution towards the household income or running.

RISE & SHINE BUSY DADS! Saturday is your day. Ask your wife to babysit for a couple of hours so you can clean the hob. 'Me time'.

I once had a very confusing conversation with a friend when we saw each other in a pub. She asked who was babysitting, I said "no one", she went into confusion and started asking me weird questions, I had no idea what she was talking about and got confused. She thought I'd left the dc's home alone, whereas their dad was home. She said "so Mr Ludways is babysitting?", "erm, no, he lives there with then"

Dh and I were pretty interchangeable with the dc's when they were little, they barely noticed which one is actually there, we are simply "the parent".

He's looking after the children .... is ok.
He's looking after the children for his wife.....not ok.
He's actually looking after the children for himself (he's their father) or for the children's sake (so they don't burn the house down / run with scissors / eat dosfoodetc)

Dh got a bit pissed off with the last person who told me I should be grateful to have a hands on husband. His exact words (coupled with his best scathing judgey face) was 'he's my son, that's just what I do.'

Having said that, I do find myself kicking him into the spare room is ds is having a bad night and he needs to be sharp at work the next day. Dh will often get up at five and take the tiny insomniac downstairs for playtime and catch up on his emails.

We try to have an overall split of duties. Obviously it ebbs and flows as circumstances dictate. If he's got a big day at work I'll make sure he gets more rest. If I'm weeping with tiredness he'll be up T 4 with the boy. It works for us.

There was a thread on here a while back where a woman was getting grief for going on a spa overnight.
Leaving her seven month old apparently, neglectful etc etc. I wanted to scream 'the child is with its parent !
We really do have a long way to go...

Yeah ebbs and flows is just sensible though Dh worked daft shifts when they were younger so he just did what he could when he was there

I meant normal not sensible

My family are all horribly old-fashioned and my grandfather, uncles and my own Dad did absolutely nothing for kids/babies or around the house. Equally, the women were absolutely expected not to work when kids arrived.

I'm a SAHM but they think the sun shines out of DH because he does what he's supposed to. I don't know how lucky I am apparently!