To refuse sex with DH until he learns hygiene

[Mousedl1]

Ok so I love my DH but his personal hygiene leaves a lot to be desired and it actually turns my stomach. He washes his hear every couple of days but I can't remember the last time he actually bathed or showered! He doesn't smell or anything but his breathe does. He doesn't clean his teeth from one day to the next and can literally go days until I flip as I have a really sensitive sense of smell.
I have tried gentle reminded etc but I have 3 kids and refuse to chase him round everyday but the smell is vulgar! Is it unreasonable to actually tell him I won't kiss or consider sex until this improves

Urgh! Bloody hell! Tell him to take a daily shower and to clean his bloody teeth!

This would be a deal breaker for me.

I'm 100% with expat.

He doesn't sound like he was very hygienic from the get go. I can't even believe you're asking if it's unreasonable to stop shagging him. I would've left him ages ago. He stinks, is a a bad example to the kids and doesn't respect you.

To think I have to sit near this type of scummy person on public transport makes me feel ill.

I'd tell him that his lack of respect for you and for your marriage is causing a crisis.

I went to go down and found it covered in cheese

The final straw came when he slid out of bed and left a skid all across the bottom sheet.

WTF?

Please say you don't have sex with this man.

I do not get why he would wash his hair but not his body. How do you explain it?

Unless I felt there was an underlying mental or physical problem (i.e. depression or hyperhidrosis) I'm afraid this would be an absolute deal-breaker for me.

You need to sit him down and have a very, very frank discussion with him.

get a water flosser and make him brush his tongue

www.amazon.co.uk/Waterpik-WP120UK-Ultra-Water-Flosser/dp/B00FJXHC72

I couldn't stand it. DH and I have a bath or shower and hair wash every day (sometimes twice, depending) teeth cleaned at least twice a day. The thought of sex with someone who wasn't cleaning their teeth or washing their bits is disgusting.

I have never heard of anyone so totally minging. How can you bear to be in the same bed, let alone kiss him?

He'd have to shape up or ship out for me.

Jesus Christ ..... at cheesy knob story. I'm seriously thinking of getting off my train at next stop to get some air .... feel queasy

Why does he go to the effort of washing his hair but not stepping in the shower and washing the rest of him?

There are filthy lesbians also. I date a woman who never washed her knickers or socks. She slept in a pile of dirty laundry, buying new as she needed them. I washed over a gross (144) pairs of socks and knickers. Never date someone who won't show you government issued picture ID, or refuse to be nude with you.

Poor you :( it's ultimatum time. As a pp said maybe he is a bit depressed though?
It's funny that he is cleaning his ears and nowhere else... ears are actually self cleaning much like vaginas - eg it's ok to clean around the outside of the area but never inside unless you want to cause yourself issues.

I left a man for (among other things) this reason. They don't change, I'm sorry but they don't. I felt so disrespected by my partner when he didn't wash. He was kind, intelligent, hilarious, hard working - it was tragic really. He just liked feeling 'free'. I tried explaining how much it hurt me and how I didn't feel valued and how he smelled. Absolutely nothing got through to him. I was utterly demoralised and felt very relieved to leave him. My partner after that had impeccable hygiene and I never thought I'd appreciate something like that so much. It was bliss.

Perhaps asking your partner to move out would get through to him. Otherwise he'll just keep promising to change and nothing will happen.

He is vile!! and there is no way I would want to be anywhere him. I would look at him in disgust all the time..
What about eating? Does he wash his hands after using the toilets?

How do you share a bed with him? Every time he tosses and turns you must get a waft of stale sweat and body fluids drifting in your direction.

My first real boyfriend that I lived with was like this. He was older than me (29!) so should've known better. He was raised by a hippy mother who didn't believe in deodorant so used none of that... He wouldn't use shower gel or shampoo either, only soap. I hate soap. and no toothpaste, tooth powder?! He also left a skid mark on the bed once and that was the end of it for me. He'd wash but because he didn't use anti-perspirant and only used soap he'd stink of BO within a couple of hours. I have a very sensitive nose, I felt very repulsed by him.

If it's not depression and this is just how he is and you've told him very bluntly before I doubt he'll change. He must enjoy being smelly . Give him an ultimatum- basically you wash every day and brush your teeth or its over. Let him know how much it repulses you often. Basically bully the shit out of him- "get away from me, you pong." "Eww brush your teeth, your breath STINKS." Every day till he (hopefully) gets the hint. If he doesn't, LTB. Hygeine is a deal breaker.

Urgh! Who doesn't have time to take a shower or brush their teeth?
Next time he's sat on his stinky arse doing nothing productive, remind him his time would be better spent in the shower.
Or stop feeding him.
I don't know... but you've got to do or say something as he seems unwilling to realise it himself
barf on him so he has to shower

This is so gross. I could not and have not put up with this as aside from his own issues or whatever, it shows a complete lack of respect for you.

Urgh!

Have you been kissing him and having sex anyway while finding him stinky and repulsive? That's not right on many levels.

Hmm, why does this thread remind me of my ex who I fed a worming tablet to, because he wouldn't stop scratching his arsehole..?

well done op this is the first mn thread thats made me wretch.

LTB.

Grey Urgh!!!!

There are some really dirty bastards.