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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to want my husband to stop doing this???

126 replies

Pennyformythoughts · 30/03/2016 16:24

This is something I have put up with for years...my husband regularly masterbates while I'm asleep in bed with him. This is not something that would really bother me too much, but he leaves stains on the bedding and subsequently the mattress. We've recently had a new bed and mattress and I don't want it to get another hideous yellow stain! Yes I have got a mattress protector but it can only do so much. A handful of times his masterbating has woken me in the night.

Most of the time I ignore it, but a few times I have got cross and snapped. He says he does it because sometimes he can't sleep and it's his way of helping him nod off. Like I say, I wouldn't be bothered if not for the stains. I have told him I don't want our new mattress ruining and he said sorry but he still does it. I think it's become a 'thing' with him, he can't sleep therefore his answer is a good tug. I admit a few times I myself have pleasures myself in order to relax enough to drift off.

We do have a decent sex life and we're both adventurous. He is a lovely man in every way and I love him very much. We have been married nearly 10 years. I am pregnant at the moment and really off sex because I've been feeling so sick and ill. He never pesters for sex, he always lets me come to him if I'm feeling randy as he says he is always up for it so just to give him a wink. I feel guilty for us not having had sex for a while and I'm sure he's masterbating every night. What should I do? Should I put up with it? Should I say something? I don't want to be nasty.

OP posts:
Sunnyshores · 30/03/2016 17:04

His mess, he should be cleaning up after himself - daily if needs be

GraysAnalogy · 30/03/2016 17:17

I'm going to admit I have a frap every now and again next to DP but I don't lie there creating a puddle. How can he NOT clean up after himself that's rank.

AnyFucker · 30/03/2016 17:21

Seriously ? Hmm

horseygeorgie · 30/03/2016 17:21

Hmm, grim! agree with the mansize tissues and bin or a designated crusty sloth that HE washes by HAND not in the machine with your things!

VinceNoirLovesHowardMoon · 30/03/2016 17:21

Would he sneeze on the sheets and leave them? Pee himself? Wanking is perfectly fine, leaving body fluids on the sheets isn't. Yuk.

AdrenalineFudge · 30/03/2016 17:22
Hmm
NeedsAsockamnesty · 30/03/2016 17:24

Jizz stained sheets are yuck

usual · 30/03/2016 17:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CocktailQueen · 30/03/2016 17:29

Sometimes I think people over-share on the internet.

Hmm
Summerisle1 · 30/03/2016 17:30

How long until the Easter holidays are over?

ouryve · 30/03/2016 17:32

a designated crusty sloth

I know they're not the cleanest of creatures, but poor thing.

OnlyLovers · 30/03/2016 17:33

Grin ouryve.

UntilTheCowsComeHome · 30/03/2016 17:34

a designated crusty sloth

GrinGrin

wombattoo · 30/03/2016 17:37

Just Yuk

PortiaCastis · 30/03/2016 17:39

Marks and Sparks have 20% off homeware this week. Send him to the nearest branch to buy a cocktail glass.Grin

BirthdayBetty · 30/03/2016 17:42
Hmm
BoopTheSnoot · 30/03/2016 17:43

You need a penis beaker Grin
Seriously though, could you not suggest that he showers before bed and does his business in there? That way he can clean up easily and go to bed afterwards, leaving your mattress nice and stain-free.

bakeoffcake · 30/03/2016 17:46

"Wanky hanky" Grin

CrossfireHurricane · 30/03/2016 17:47

Must be very annoying, ruining the bedclothes.
Absolutely pissing myself over the dog scratching his earGrin

TattyDevine · 30/03/2016 17:47

Ooh this reminds me of a joke.

"What's 9 inches long, full of cum and makes women scream?"

"The sock under my bed"

Grin
Ohfourfoxache · 30/03/2016 17:51

You could cut down the side of some big black plastic bags, open them up, and place them under the sheets all over his side of the bed. They would be far more uncomfortable to sleep on than the pads Jess linked to ^.

If he isn't considerate enough to clean up after himself then you shouldn't have to be considerate enough to consider his comfort.

CoraPirbright · 30/03/2016 17:52

I can't find it to link but a while ago there was a hilarious thread about a mum who had made her son a special "knitted wank mitt". Perhaps he needs one of these - how is your knitting OP Grin

MySordidCakeSecret · 30/03/2016 17:57

oh dear god Shock

PhoenixReisling · 30/03/2016 18:03

This thread has made me Grin

OP why can't you ask him to keep his pants on while he does the knuckle shuffle

off to google what a posh wank is

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