AIBU to expect my 6yo to tidy up?

[Rinoachicken]

DS1 is 6 and in a whole corner of the conservatory is closed off with a baby gate to stop DS2 (aged 2) getting his Lego and things. (They share a room).

It's a total mess and we've spent the whole day trying to make him tidy it up. We've said no TV until it's done. He goes in moves maybe one thing and then starts messing about/playing in the last tiny bit of floor space left.

It's not like we ask him to do much round he house; we ask him to put his plates and cups by the sink when he's finished and put his dirty washing in the laundry basket.

AIBU to expect him to do this, because he seems to think so (his cheekiness is another issue!) and I'm starting to wonder if it is asking too much for his age. or maybe it's the other way and we've been running around after him too long!

What does your 6yo to do round the house?

You need to break it down into smaller tasks for him really, saying 'go and clear it up' doesn't really say what exactly it is that he has to do.

My 6 YO will do bits and bobs without any argument, putting toys away, putting out the recycling, folding up clean clothes etc, but I wouldn't expect her to have any techniques in place on how to clear a whole area, that's pretty daunting for even an adult.

We've tried that, we've said just pick up the Lego or just pick up the books and then we'll help him do the rest etc but he still won't do it.

Just do it with him

That's what I usually end up doing coco, except doing it with him turns into doing t for him because he can't be bothered.

If I asked him to take clean clothes upstairs he'd just chuck them in his bedroom door.

Ha ha. Mine too, whereas my friend's kids keep their rooms pristine. They absolutely have to pick things up as they go along and the house is always immaculate. I'm just not like that and haven't trained my kids well.

Go in with him and tell him to pick up 20 things. Or point to each thing in turn?

We seem to have accidentally hit on something! I suggested that maybe he had too much stuff and we should get rid of some (thinking of all the front of comic tat he insists on keeping!) and he agreed and got all enthusiastic about putting all his toys he's grown out of into a box and into the for his younger brother later.

He's now busying himself sorting through it all and deciding what to put in the box! Once he's decided what to keep/pass on we will help him get it all tidied away and hopefully it will be easier to keep on top of.

Am genuinely curious what household 'chores' are appropriate at what age??

I can remember having to polish ornaments and glasses at the weekends for my pocket money at about his age I think?

He does it or it goes in the bin/shed/elsewhere for a week. He can earn it back by helping with chores.

Same with putting clothes away. If they go on the floor then take away his favourites and leave plain tshirts and pants and that's it. He can have it back when he learns to look after it.

You are doing him (and his future partners) no favours, sorry.

YANBU!
I expect my 6 yo DSS to tidy up his toys, fold his clothes (best he can), take his dirty plates into the kitchen & put dirty clothes in wash bin.
If you don't install these things in them early, they'll never do it. Even if it's not done to your standard it's important they try :)

just finding you a link or picture I have for age-appropriate chores. Back soon.

Here is the link I was talking about

kidsactivitiesblog.com/46550/chores-for-kids

Good luck with your retraining :)

Thank you KP86! And I agree it's the effort (or lack of it!) that we care about most.

Think we might need to start a 'family chores' chart or something, so he can see we are all doing our jobs to help the house run. Even his 2yo brother helps pick up his toys FFS!!

I put on 'tidy up' music for my grandchildren, if that doesn't work , I get out a large black bin bag................
They usually rush to tidy when they see the bin bag.