To be frightened of my life being like this and afraid I'm just not strong enough for it

[gardenswithchickensinthem]

Pity party. But also advice if you have any.

I've never had a bad back before apart from a brief bit of sciatica once which caused a fair few muffled expletives but otherwise not too bad. It also cleared up in a week.

Six weeks ago my back suddenly 'went'. The pain was in all honesty and not wanting to sound like a wimp nothing like I've ever experienced before. I couldn't drive, sit, move, bend, do anything.

I was prescribed some pain relief which helped stop the 'spasms' but didn't really address the root cause.

Have now been referred for an MRI scan.

But after six weeks of constant and at times pretty excruciating pain, I'm so weary. I am managing to go to work, mostly, and it drains me completely. I just come home and sleep as I find it so tiring. Children laugh at my walking (teacher) and I worry colleagues think I'm putting it on. People keep asking how did you do it or what have you done and I just don't know! Driving is horribly sore and I'm actually scared to cough or sneeze. I never thought the day would come when I was scared to sneeze!

If I wake in the night needing a wee it's like an epic movement. I hate mornings so much as it takes me ages to move from lying to standing. I hate feeding the cats as I have to bend over. I hate feeling woozy and tired all the time due to heavy pain relief (before this happened the last time I took a paracetamol was probably 2013 sometime. I just don't get ill much.)

I am SO miserable.

Sorry - but God it felt good to let that out!

I've had back spasms. They're fucking awful. Mine rendered me bedbound and frightened to move much more months. This probably prolonged it though.

Sounds like it could be herniated disc - your muscles go into overdrive to protect it, but then can't get out of the cycle.

What worked for me- loads of painkillers, acupuncture to reduce the inflammation, then osteopathic treatment.

Good luck!

Total sympathy, my back 'went' a few years ago, never felt pain like it, even Tramadol wouldn't touch it. It's worth getting assessed by a chiropractor (look up McTimoney chiros in your area) they won't touch it if it's not something they can treat but mine had me sorted in a few sessions, had no trouble since. McTimoney isn't the kind where they throw you around or crunch any bones, it's all very gentle and I have no idea how it fixed my problem but it did! Message me if you happen to be in the West Midlands and I'll pass on details of the lady I used, hope you're out of pain soon

Oh, and heat, rest, and think positive - you WILL get better

Try not to bend over, squat and bend your knees for the cats, or feed them on the worktop.

Should say I'm in NW and my private physio is £32 a session but flexible if you're struggling for money. She will also do acupuncture and ultrasound treatment

Try a good chiropracter, if it it going to help it should be within a couple of sessions and can be a huge improvement.

If it helps, I suffered from excrutiating pain in lower back and also in my left shoulder, which went down right to my fingertips. M R I was negative.
I went to a physio and he showed me what I was doing wrong. Bad posture, wasn't using my part of the back around the hips rto move at all, same goes for neck. Plus it was all getting worse when I was stressed. Exercises and being aware of what I was doing helped. Now your problem might be different but a good physio is definitely worth to try.

What pain killers are you on? I've found Diclofenac the best to reduce inflammation, then diazepam as a muscle relaxant and cocodamol for the pain works well for me ( but spaces me out - wouldn't be fit to drive).

Your poor thing - DH had this last year and was in agony. It was scary for him, and for me as it seemed so extreme and unknown. It was a herniated disc.

He was signed off work for 6 weeks. He had painkillers (Naproxen and Codeine) and moved about as much as the pain would allow.

He is recovered, with twinges, and he has to be careful. What helps him the most on a regular basis (not when it was flared up) is to relax his back by lying flat on the food with calves resting on sofa at a right angle, or doing similar on the sofa (lying on back, calves propped up with pile of cushions).

BTW - your school management is shit. You should not be going to work

I've got Naproxen, and paracetamol, plus tramadol for emergencies.

I'm a bit wary of seeing a chiropractor before the MRI, as I did have a back massage a few weeks ago that made it worse!

Everything is just such an effort. I think that's what frightens me.

I recently experienced something very similar, OP. Wihin a matter of hours, my back went from slightly sore to being so painful I was almost paralysed. I've never had anything like it; sitting, walking, bending, everything was agony except lying flat on the floor. I was walking like a 90 her old and, frustratingly, I hadn't fall dor twisted or anything... It just happened! I'm 36, never ill, and I run marathons and triathlons. It was completely inexplicable.

As it was slightly to one side, I spdecided it must be muscular, so didn't go for any professional help. I used over the counter painkillers and got as many gentle massages as I could and now, six weeks later, it's just about passed.

If you're worried it could be a disc, and you want a very fast diagnosis, I'd suggest a private MRI for £200.

My gp was rubbish, I paid to see an osteopath and within minutes he had found what was wrong and within a month I was off the meds and......walking! I was in a right old state before that. It's worth seeing someone else as I don't feel gps are the experts when it comes to this.

My DH was lucky - GP was great.

I think it 'helped' that he made a dramatic entrance to the surgery - on all fours

.... my DH, not the GP

The MRI private is a lot of money. In any case, I'm not sure how long the waiting list is - will wait and see. Everything plays down back pain as in 'yes yes, it hurts but nothing is really wrong, you know!'

I've only got today and tomorrow before we break up for Easter, so will try to get through. I have some key GCSE classes, some of whom have already been really messed about, and I just couldn't. Children I actually teach are mostly really sweet and helpful but classes I don't know obviously just see a hobbling teacher and think it is funny!

Chiro is nothing like a massage OP and a decent one will examine you thoroughly before deciding whether they can help. It's worth asking around people you know (a surprising number of people use a chiropractor) for recommendations to make sure you get someone good, I wish you lived near me as mine is fabulous and cheaper than most because she works out of a rented room in a doctors surgery rather than a swanky clinic! I had no faith it would help me but was in so much pain I had to do something and the GP was useless. I really feel for you, I haven't forgotten the pain 5 years later, hope one of the suggestions on here will do the trick and get you out of pain

I second (or third _have not RTFT) a chiropractor. I displaced my sacroiliac joint which was excruciating. He put it back. He put it back three times in ten years and if it comes out now I can get it back myself but could not have early on. Once he puts it back the pain is instantly gone and it heals up (until the next time - I am awaiting internal fixation) It may be a straightforward 'one click' solution.

Sympathies to you. My husband has episodes of back pain like this (he had two herniated discs that are now dehydrated). An MRI will tell you for sure what's going on but from your symptoms, it does sound like a herniated/prolapsed disc. I don't know why back pain is so dismissed by everyone because I've seen what it does to people. I hope you're better soon - and you will get better, even though it doesn't feel like it.

As well as pain-relieving meds, on bad days my husband starts the day with a roasting hot bath (as he is often very stiff and sore as soon as he wakes), followed by some stretching for about half an hour. He also has built up a regime of strengthening exercises which he thinks has helped long term. He avoids sitting down for long periods and in the car has a special cushion to support his lumbar region. When you're well enough to be seen by a physio they will be able to help you with all this.

Ooh I know your pain. I have a herniated disk. And am awaiting a nerve block. If that doesn't work I've got to decide if I rely on heavy duty pain pills or have surgery.

You can't bare the burden because your work is short staffed, you need some time off to get the right levels of medication sorted, and so that you are not making your back worse by over exerting yourself.

Check with school and your union if you can access any private cover. Worth a try. Do not feel guilty about time off - your school and students need you fit and well!

Oh my goodness are you me! I am currently in the same predicament. I teach 5 year olds and have a severely bulging disc in my back. Physio wouldn't take me on am waiting on a surgical consultation with a view to getting the disc shaved. I also have a not quite walking yet 13 month old.
I understand how you feel. I feel old, pain wears you down. I took two weeks off work but have to save my sick leave because of the chance of an operation.
I hate hobbling I hate looking out at the fine weather and I hate the lack of sleep. Was on strong painkillers for a while but they made me feel drunk so have cut them down.

Sorry Ive not read the whole thread, but you can self refer to Physio at your local hospital. They will have forms at the desk to fill in.

Hope you get it sorted