Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

AIBU to want to sit with my family on a special event like this

26 replies

coralpig · 22/03/2016 12:55

My brother opens in a big musical tonight- it's really exciting and we've been counting down the days. We were entitled to 4 tickets and could then book extras that wouldn't necessarily be sat together.

The initial plan was to have my parents and then me and my partner but my partner can't make it anymore due to work. So my mum decided that she would invite our very close friend. Close friend accepted but asked if her partner could come along too. Mum didn't want to say no so she booked another ticket but they couldn't seat us all together so there are 4 tickets booked and then one separate. I normally don't mind sitting on my own but it's such a special occasion for us all I would really rather sit with my parents.

It's not the end of the world, of course, as I still get to watch the show and the extra seat is technically a slightly better view but I would really rather not be alone. AIBU?

OP posts:

Xmasbaby11 · 22/03/2016 12:58

One of your parents can take the seat alone?

Yanbu but in all probability noone wants to sit alone. It wouldn't be fair to split the couple

ScarletOverkill · 22/03/2016 13:00

Unfortunately I think you are the one who will be sitting alone.
I don't think it is fair though.

mamas12 · 22/03/2016 13:06

Phone the friend right now saying that this special night is going to,be wonderful watching as a family together and how you're all looking forward to sharing itand isn't it nice that they're going too and hope her/his partner enjoys it from where they're sitting
Do not assume it's you who is moving
It is their bonus night and your original night don't be a wuss be proactive and get your point in first.

plantsitter · 22/03/2016 13:34

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all, and what mamas12 said!

StillDrSethHazlittMD · 22/03/2016 13:42

Your mum invited friend who wanted to bring their partner. Your mum booked another ticket for partner. Partner is the one who gets to sit on their own because they are the "late addition".

Although, and I say this as someone who works in the theatre, I never understand why some people won't buy tickets if they can't sit together. You're watching a show, you're not there to talk to whoever you're with during the show - you do that in the interval and afterwards.

2rebecca · 22/03/2016 13:49

Agree friend's partner sits alone but your mum should have realised his seat would be somewhere else when she booked it. She should have just got the friend to book the extra seat herself, not sure why your mum took it on.

Scattymere · 22/03/2016 13:56

Your friend should have been more than happy to be offered this ticket- I would never dream of asking if my partner could come along when I was told a spare ticket,one tickets,asked me specifically. How rude. They wanted them "there" well they can lump it and sit on their own then, your family should totally be together for this.
Please text friend very causally "very excited about tonight, not sure if confirmed but as other ticket was booked separately to ours John will be sitting on his own during the performance, but we can of course all catch up in the interval and after the show, Very excited! xx".

Enjoy OP!

ctjoy103 · 22/03/2016 13:59

Yanbu, friends partner has to sit alone. You sitting with your parents on a big night for your brother trumps this couple. He's the additional one , so friend needs to sort it out. Also don't get drawn into explaining yourself, just sit with your parents and get into the night. Enjoy.

bakeoffcake · 22/03/2016 14:14

The friend or her partner should sit alone.

CosyNook · 22/03/2016 14:47

Its nothing to do with you really so you should sit with your family. Your mum should have made it clear there was only one ticket.

Its for your mum, friend or friends partner to sit alone - however I think it will end up being you.

squashtastic · 22/03/2016 14:52

YANBU

squashtastic · 22/03/2016 14:53

Also I don't see why you can't split a couple (who don't even need to be there) but you can split a family who should be there. Might be nice for your brother to be able to spot you all in the crowd

BreconBeBuggered · 22/03/2016 14:56

I can't see any good reason why it's more appropriate for the OP to sit alone than the couple. They can decide between them who gets to sit separately.

WhereYouLeftIt · 22/03/2016 15:12

Your mother caused this situation. I don't see why you should be the one to suffer.

Your mother's friend can either sit on her own or her partner can, since the 'extra' was bought for them. Sadly, your mother sitting alone - which would be just deserts - means you wouldn't get to sit with your family.

Do NOT accept being shoved off to the single seat.

MegMez · 22/03/2016 15:27

I work in theatre, I watch a lot of theatre and most of the time I'm in the audience on my own. I couldn't give two hoots. One brother is a professional actor and the other used to do a lot of semi-pro work. I have been to see them in almost sold out shows where we've not been able to sit together. I'd rather sit on my own than miss out. I'd rather go to a show on my own than not go at all because my husband's got our kids and I can't find anyone else to go with.

Make sure you arrange to meet for a drink/ice cream in the interval. Get a programme if you don't want to feel weird sitting on your own when waiting for it to start. I usually take a book or kindle to read while I have a drink in blissful solitude amongst the clattering masses. It's about watching your brother. Go for him, watch up, soak it up. It shouldn't matter that you can't share your sweeties with your parents or hold hands with your friend.

mouldycheesefan · 22/03/2016 15:36

Meg mes,, How patronising! The op doesn't have a friend going, it's the mums friend.
She wants to sit her parents so they can enjoy brother performance together it's clearly a big event for them. You may be blasé about watching family members on stage but it's not on to be so rude to the op.

FeelingSmurfy · 22/03/2016 15:49

I would have no problem going to the theatre alone and sitting alone, but if I go with someone then I expect to sit with them

If I was in this situation I would want to experience it with my parents, and if I was the friend in this situation I would not expect Op to give up her seat

FindingNemo99 · 22/03/2016 15:55

Sounds exciting - maybe you're worrying too much and no one expects you to sit on your own? I'm a bit like that, play out scenarios like this before an event and then everything works out and I've worried for nothing.
Let us know how it goes and whatever happens enjoy yourself

Original poster

coralpig · 22/03/2016 23:01

So I did end up sitting by myself for the first half and then there was a spare seat near my parents for the second half so I moved there. Didn't matter though as it was wonderful. I was overthinking it and it didn't make any difference to me. Great experience. Thanks for the responses

OP posts:

2rebecca · 22/03/2016 23:11

I do think that was mean of your mum's friend to take your seat and thoughtless of your mum to not tell her friend "if you want him to come you can try and order a seat but he may not be with us"
You wouldn't do that to your mum if she was unmarried and favour a friend over her.
Glad it went well but I'd be disappointed in my mum for behaving that thoughtlessly.

lorelei9 · 22/03/2016 23:40

Wow
In think you should have said together as a family
The couple should have been split. What are they, Howard and Hilda? How pathetic.
Glad you enjoyed it anyway, sounds exciting!

lorelei9 · 22/03/2016 23:41

*sat
Ruddy autocorrect

lorelei9 · 22/03/2016 23:42

Meg, I go to theatre, cinema alone but that so wasn't the point here.

BackforGood · 22/03/2016 23:50

I go to the theatre on my own, and - as many have said - I don't consider it an issue to be on my own, but in this case, your Mum should have said in the first instance to the friend..."Well, we have 4 tickets, 3 of which we are using. You are welcome to the 4th one, and of course there;s no reason why your partner can't book to come and see the show on the same night, but there is only 1 seat to sit together with us. Up to you/them if they come along and sit elsewhere or not".

Ridiculous to move you - if it's not an issue to sit on your own in their eyes, then her partner could have done it, and if it is an issue, then I can't understand how they thought it was ok to bump you away from your family to sit alone . How rude your friends are.

allnewredfairy · 23/03/2016 07:14

Glad you enjoyed the show OP but I do think it was unfair to make you sit on your own.

Flip

1 2