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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Soft Play Etiquette

69 replies

Waltermittythesequel · 21/03/2016 12:49

Just pondering.

Woman with baby who looks around 1 - 1.5 years allowing baby into over 5s area where older children are playing.

Is she being U? And if baby gets hurt, accidentally of course, WSBU to be annoyed.

Second question!

Adult man, walking two toddlers up the giant slide in over 5s area, with his shoes on.

IHBU?

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 21/03/2016 12:53

There is generally a complete lack of etiquette in these places. Avoid them at all costs is the best advice!

Original poster
Waltermittythesequel · 21/03/2016 12:55

It's too late. I got a free pass and caved. Like a greedy gobshite. Sad

OP posts:
cathpip · 21/03/2016 13:00

Adult man unreasonable for having shoes on and walking up the slide.....
Woman allowing 1-1.5 year old in over 5s area is fine but sibu to get annoyed if her child gets accidentally knocked.

HeartShapedBox · 21/03/2016 13:01

If the baby gets hurt, the only person the mum is allowed to be annoyed at is herself.

Man is unreasonable on a few counts- slides are for going down, not climbing up. Toddlers are too young to be in that area. There's a no shoes rule for a reason.

But yeah, soft play is a hell it's best to avoid Grin

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 21/03/2016 13:02

Case scenario 1. Yes very unreasonable. If a child 5+ accidentally stepped on her child. She'd probably take off like a banshee when her child shouldn't even be in there. They have age designated areas for safe guarding reasons.

Case senario. Yes also very unreasonable. Especially in shoes. Everyone picks up grit on their shoes outside. And supposen there was dog shit on his shoes.

Did staff not say anything. In these instances.

BadgersBum · 21/03/2016 13:02

Both of these things get on my tit ends. If your child isn't old enough to go into an area, when they have their own bit, don't whine at me when my child a) knocks into them as he's tearing around the area he IS the right age for or b) give me filthy looks when same child barges past you and your child in that area, as you're holding up the children who are able to make their own way around.

I've had parents come over to me and disturb my coffee for both of the above reasons, I usually point at the sign which clearly say 'for use of children between the ages of 4 and 11 only', and ask which of the people standing in front of me fall within that range? They usually tell me my child is exceptionally rude, I tell them he gets it from me, but is also EXCEPTIONALLY within the correct age range for the equipment.

I think the day my child (along with about 5 or 6 others of a similar age) was told off for bouncing too enthusiastically on a busy bouncy castle, by a couple who were wanting to sit on it with their newborn between them, will be forever linger in the memories of my friends who were with me at the time (but all stood back and waiting for me to approach them first).

Lurkedforever1 · 21/03/2016 13:05

Both are bu. Even if the mum isn't bothered about her baby being knocked over, some dc will spoil their fun trying to be careful not to.

Original poster
Waltermittythesequel · 21/03/2016 13:06

Incident 1 - mum asked me to ask my dc to be more gentle with giant bouncy balls. I have to stress, they WEREN'T being in any way rough because I don't allow that behaviour in a soft play or anywhere else.

I told her politely that I wasn't going to say anything to them unless they were being dangerous but I did tell them to be careful with baby tottering around.

She got the hump and swept baby away, only to let her return two seconds later.

Incident 2 - I'm afraid to say I told tales and the lady called it out over the speaker Blush. Didn't stop him but lady was watching at that point and came over to speak to him.

He left shortly after.

I fucking hate these places.

OP posts:
5Foot5 · 21/03/2016 13:07

I think the staff were also unreasonable for not doing their job.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 21/03/2016 13:08

He was walking up the slide. I thought you meant the steps.. Shock. Is he for real. That's something you'd tell off for.
He must have looked like a right twonk.

Original poster
Waltermittythesequel · 21/03/2016 13:10

He looked utterly ridiculous. I have to say the woman working here sounded a bit shell shocked about having to spell out to him that you generally don't climb the slide, especially with shoes on, especially when you're an adult!

OP posts:
TeaBelle · 21/03/2016 13:12

At our local.soft play the areas have ages but the signs also state that younger children can go into an older area with parental supervision. Thank god as the slide/ball pit area is labelled for 3 plus and dd outgrew the under 3 area well before her first birthday (just baby toys in a soft area, no physical stuff at all)

8angle · 21/03/2016 13:16

I take my DS to one - he's 14 months, i don't think there is a minimum age or a max where we go. I just go in with him - act as a blocker or swoop him out of the way if needed! I do take my shoes off - and go down the slide!

Original poster
Waltermittythesequel · 21/03/2016 13:18

There are three areas here.

Under 2s

Under 5s

Over 5s

I think if you want to let your baby in that's fair enough but you can't really dictate that older children shouldn't play as usual!

OP posts:
Allnamesaretakenffs · 21/03/2016 13:22

I've had some horrific experiences at soft play. I find them extremely stressful places so avoid avoid avoid.

Allnamesaretakenffs · 21/03/2016 13:23

"I think if you want to let your baby in that's fair enough but you can't really dictate that older children shouldn't play as usual!"

Yup. I'd just say "ok" and not bother. No point talking with these people.

coffeeisnectar · 21/03/2016 13:30

Soft play is the seventh circle of hell and you should never go unless you are prepared for the chaos, noise, rudeness and unreasonable behaviour of every child and adult in the place . Also they are mostly disgustingly dirty ... never ever try and look at the bottom of the ball pit.

MrTiddlestheFatCat · 21/03/2016 13:31

I used to work in a local soft play centre. We were required as staff to stop children walking up the slides, stop adults coming down, and stop children who were too little from going on. Obviously we were only doing this for the kids' safety.

The amount of parents I had shouting at me, sometimes screaming, telling me they knew what was best for their kids etc etc etc. Lots of parents having no idea their toddler had been on the massive slide, or too busy on their phones to notice.

We got in so many people like the ones being described on the active retail thread- lots of adult tantrums in front of their perplexed children...

TheWitTank · 21/03/2016 13:32

I was overjoyed when my days of hell on earth softplay came to an end as my kids got older and didn't ask to go anymore. Havens of rudeness, arsey parents, germs and toddler punch ups.
In answer to your questions -yes, shoe man is being a twonk and mum of baby can go where she likes as long as she blames herself when her child takes a face full of overexcited toddler/crazed 5 year old.

PeteAndManu · 21/03/2016 13:36

I can feel my blood pressure rising at the thought of soft play although we only go for parties now. We have a great parlour and outdoor play barns. They have really wide slides which some parents let their children slide down, then walk back up, slide down, walk back up etc all the time children who use it properly have to wait at the top because they don't want to run into the child walking up the slide. One time they did run into a child who fell onto my child. Selfish behaviour.

Scenario 1 I take my older children out to burn off energy, whilst they won't deliberately hurt a child and will take care, why should they have to tiptoe around a baby in the wrong area.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 21/03/2016 13:39

Remembers fondly...

One brat about 6 on a 10+ big slide. The only way he could climb it was up the actual slide. The wood platforms were too high (deliberately)

The big kids waited patiently for him to climb up then slide down. Then he screams abuse from the bottom and starts climbing again.

Parent was watching their little darling and doing nothing.

So the biggest kid there slides down the slide properly, after announcing his intentions. And explaining its a slide. Not a climb.

He rolled himself into a ball, so he didn't get hurt.

There were lots of smiles for that big kid that day.

The toddler. Her choice, but her problem if toddler gets hurt.

The man... Maybe he can't read?
Or is above the rules?
Or is a dick

paxillin · 21/03/2016 13:48

I see this a lot on an adventure playground, specifically aimed at 8-12 yos. 18 months old toddlers staggering around a fireplace or under swing ropes. Parents of said toddlers indignant at the speed of pre-teens and the hazard of the fire.

paxillin · 21/03/2016 13:56

I only ever went to soft play when invited to a birthday party at such a hell hole. I shall rejoice when the youngest has grown too tall to get into the last one. (only 2 inches to go- yay)

littlethingsthatbug · 21/03/2016 13:58

People should stick to the right areas if your Dcs were playing just fine and her baby was too little why should you be the one to tell yours off. She should get in the right play area for her dc age or face them being knocked over innocently by a bigger child.

We had the opposite at Christmas and Partner went crazy!

We were in the right area under 2 area which is pretty big but the ball pool design is stupid (it's so hard to get into for parents but a doddle for small children as it's enclosed on 3 sides and a small way in) we had 6-7 year olds jumping all over DD she was in the balls and even just on the mats with us and just didn't care. I recorded her having fun for some 6 year old to knee her in the head ploughing through the balls.

We asked our own children to leave straight away when they came to ask us questions about lunch. Even though they were wanting to join in with our youngest DD we said no please go and play together in their area because they weren't supposed to be in there and we couldn't be mad with other parents if we let ours do the same.

I hate going but the kids love it, we dont go often tbh because every time there is something or someone to spoil it.

Lamu · 21/03/2016 14:01

Oh the joys of soft play.

Spend the entire time supervising your own child, whilst another parent blindly ignores their little brat child repeatedly grabbing Dd 23 months round the neck and pulling her backwards! Angry

I have had some terrible experiences. Usually due to some parents not giving a shit whilst little Jonny terrorises all the other children.