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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think buying a house with a friend is a bad idea?

54 replies

lottielou7 · 18/03/2016 09:48

I understand why people do it given that usually one person won't earn enough alone to buy a house. But you'd be tied, financially to that person whom you might not actually want to spend the rest of your life with. If my daughter did this I think I would be concerned.

OP posts:

StereophonicallyChallenged · 18/03/2016 09:53

You can always sell a house you know! Its not a lifelong commitment

My dbro bought with a friend and they each have their own homes now which just wouldn't have been possible without sharing the starter home/mortgage.

Arfarfanarf · 18/03/2016 09:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ireallydontseewhy · 18/03/2016 10:04

It seemed to be more common in the 80s, as a way of two single people affording it - does seem less common now, possibly because even with two people it's still unaffordable!

JustABigBearAlan · 18/03/2016 10:07

It's fine if you do it properly. It means you're not 'wasting' money on rent, and when you sell it, if you are lucky the property may well have gone up in value and so you'll have a better deposit for the next place.

Obviously there are risks involved, but done with the right contracts and the right research it can work well.

feellikeahugefailure · 18/03/2016 10:08

Its a really bad idea.

The market is oveheated and when it next crashes people could be stuck there.

Caprinihahahaha · 18/03/2016 10:10

I did it in the 80s . It was fine. We both lived in the house for two years, sold it and made enough to help towards a deposit on our own places. We would never have been able to afford it separately.
Of course it's different now but it wasn't a problem for us back then. We were not tied to each other. We agreed a minimum period after which either of us could give notice that we wanted to sell.

Original poster

lottielou7 · 18/03/2016 10:36

I think it could be fine when you're in early 20s but when you meet someone you want to live with, what then? Amd you're tied to someone else financially. Plus if one person doesn't pay their share of the mortgage, you'll be responsible too.

OP posts:

Sparklycat · 18/03/2016 10:56

When you meet someone you want to live with you sell the house and you get a contract drawn up re mortgage payments etc. I think it's a very sensible way of getting on the property ladder. Better than flat sharing rented accommodation and lining someone else's pockets.

scarlets · 18/03/2016 11:07

It can work. Each party needs their own solicitor.

BarbaraofSeville · 18/03/2016 11:25

It can be a good idea, but what if you want to sell when the market is bad and you can only sell by losing a load of money.

What if one person wants to sell and the other doesn't but can't afford to take it all on themselves?

What if one person doesn't pay their share of the mortgage or other bills. Both credit ratings will be ruined due to financial association.

Sistersweet · 18/03/2016 11:39

I think it's an excellent idea so long as you have an agreement drawn up for when one wants to sell. I would look at it as a business transaction and hope that on selling both parties would leave with a profit.

expatinscotland · 18/03/2016 11:51

It has potential for going very wrong.

stumblymonkey · 22/03/2016 07:49

I know a few people who have done it....when they met someone they moved out and rented their room to a lodger which effectively paid their share of the mortgage.

A better idea than wasting £1,000s-£10,000s on rent IMO.

Osirus · 22/03/2016 07:50

I did it and it was fine.

LurkingHusband · 22/03/2016 09:21

Not something you hear about these days.

When I graduated in the 80s, it was possible for every person in the arrangement (say 4 friends) to get MIRAS - mortgage tax relief. It was a running theme in the press of day that it was fundamentally unfair that an unmarried couple could buy a house and get 2 lots of MIRAS, whereas a married couple only got one (and 4 friends got 4). Which is why we don't have MIRAS anymore.

It was one of the options I had when after graduating. I looked at quite a few houses in SE London with a friend. In those days, estate agents could also sell mortgages, and after the 3rd agent had extolled the virtues of endowment mortgages my friend and I retired to a pub and looked over the leaflets. 20 minutes later we agreed endowment mortgages were risky as hell and no way to buy a house. Which makes me wonder quite how "missold" people were, if a couple of 21 year old students could spot the flaw .....

G1raffe · 22/03/2016 09:26

I think in the past you'd hope the house increased in value in the 2 years you're sharing that made the costs of moving all worth it.

The "step on the ladder" doesn't really work around here now. "starter homes" she all many many people can afford and the leap to the next level up at all stages is hard.

I still can't believe I could buy in #expensive town # at 22 as 2 graduates. Right now, even owning a house in #cheaper town# at 37 I couldn't even buy the house I used to live in as I'm completely priced out :(

Iamliftzilla · 22/03/2016 09:29

I know several people who have done this i recent years. It's working find for them all.

DoJo · 22/03/2016 12:09

All the risks listed above apply equally to buying a house with a partner or spouse.

PastaLaFeasta · 22/03/2016 12:13

DH's friends did it and it enabled them to climb the ladder. There was flexibility in selling and renting out when it suited. A good solicitor will help on the contract and explore possible outcomes. Better than not buying at all, especially in pricey areas of the country where you are making a safe investment.

whois · 22/03/2016 13:00

I know two different couples (couples of friends, not sex couples) who have done this.

Worked out well in both cases.

All very well thought out legal provisions such as what happened if one person wants to move out, if one person wants to bring a partner in, how rent will be calculated ifnonenperson mo Es out, how you can buy the other out, how to give notice to force a sale. Etc etc.

whois · 22/03/2016 13:05

In once case one guy moved out about 2 years ago and moved in with his partner. The remaining guy rented out the room and that covers the mortgage plus a bit more. I think they have an agreement how the excess over the mortgage is split as well. They are now selling as the remaining guy wants to move with his GF and not keep the flat. So no dramas and all positive.

The other pair - one moved out yonks ago and the remaining guy rented out the room, and then he got a loan from his parents and a bigger mortgage and bought the other guy out.

Tabsicle · 22/03/2016 13:11

I have friends who did this. Lived together for four years, then sold and moved on having made money on it. No trouble at all.

SugarplumMary · 22/03/2016 13:15

I know a few people who have done it....when they met someone they moved out and rented their room to a lodger which effectively paid their share of the mortgage.

Know a friend who did this - the lodger was another friend who friend left got on well with.

In the end the one left in house bought the other out -- his wage had gone up a lot and house weren't very expensive where they were at that time and he got a small inheritance. This was 90's. Worked for him both him and his eventual DP sold their properties then bought a big family house.

It worked for him - but there is a lot of risk attached.

I know many more people buy small flats then rent them out or try and sell when they move in with someone. Fair few of my landlords in my 20 were like this - though I didn't find them great landlords TBH. I knew a woman at work who did this but had a renter who frequently didn't pay the rent but was having a legal nightmare getting place back and a lot of stress plus was having to find money for the mortgage still.

Byrdie · 22/03/2016 13:42

I did this - not in the 80s i'd like to add - it was in 2003. I bought a london flat with a friend. We lived in it together for 2years. I then moved out and rented my room to another friend and then to my friends now husband. We sold it after 3 or 4 years and made a very decent profit each. Lucky as it was pre crash, but we didn't do it for that, it was so we didn't waste the money on rent. A few things we did; We had a tenants in common mortgage or whatever it's called when you are responsible for a part of the mortgage not both of you responsible for 100% together - that makes a huge difference. Effectively it meant i could leave the 50% i owned to my parents in my will and she could do the same. Not that either if us died, but we thought about all scenarios and how it would work financial in all situations. We also put the same in as deposit, paid the same portion in bills, split who would buy what for the house and took what belonged to us when we moved out. It worked great, but then this is my best friend, we trust each other but even so had an agreement pre flat purchase on everything. She had a much bigger cash next egg for a deposit, but only put in what i could afford to put in, however i earnt a lot more than she did so had more savings building up during the time we owned the flat. so many fond memories of our time there. We looked after that flat and loved it. It was less stressful than renting in my opinion (i rented since moving out until less than a year ago)

MitzyLeFrouf · 22/03/2016 13:44

Friends of mine did it and it worked fine. They had a contract drawn up stating how much each person was adding to the deposit and what the ownership would be. They also decided from the outset that the house would be sold in 5 years time.

But I'm sure it can go drastically wrong, just as buying a house with a romantic partner can.

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