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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think its near on impossible to have a cheap wedding?

134 replies

DownUnderBound · 08/03/2016 09:58

In our many years and dc together we have actually booked and cancelled two weddings packages! Each time turned into a circus, with everyone else thinking it was all about them, and taking over, moaning & making us feel guilty over small guestlists etc.(not inviting second cousins we literally dont even know) I have a feeling of its now or never, not getting any younger! But a googling session tonight has confirmed that it cannot be done! Am I wrong? Any tips?

OP posts:
Original poster
DownUnderBound · 08/03/2016 10:28

Oyster — I would say around 2000 (exclusively for wedding) Things like my dress/ring etc I mentioned can be bought seperately. Local registery office is 275.

OP posts:
cuckoooo · 08/03/2016 10:29

I can't talk for my own wedding (it was big and very expensive) but one of the nicest weddings I attended was my close friend who invited about 15 close family and friends to the registry office for a very emotional ceremony and then took them out for lunch at a fancy restaurant. She even just wore a highstreet dress with a fascinator. It was small, intimate and felt special.

I reckon the whole wedding cost them £300 all up.

Original poster
DownUnderBound · 08/03/2016 10:29

Cake/flowers/even photos I know I can pull in as favours from few family/friends, they have already offered.Smile

OP posts:
AdoraBell · 08/03/2016 10:29

Depends what type of wedding you want.

DH and I had what we wanted despite being told what to do and spent about 5,000.

My sister had her two best mates as witnesses and phoned family the following week to tell us they were married.

Original poster
DownUnderBound · 08/03/2016 10:30

Cuckooo that sounds perfect

OP posts:
LemonySmithit · 08/03/2016 10:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OliviaDunham · 08/03/2016 10:33

We had a registry office, then went to a carvery for lunch. We were in holiday when we got married and out immediate family came for it, was perfect. And cost less than £400. My DM made a cake and MIL made me a bouquet.

LemonySmithit · 08/03/2016 10:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Starwarsorbaby · 08/03/2016 10:34

Also, only took us 2 months to go from proposal to married. Doesn't need to take months of planning! Only knew each other 7 months. Been married 2 years in July and have 2 wonderful children. Very happy 😊

ohtheholidays · 08/03/2016 10:34

We did it and my BF is doing the same this year.

She's getting married in the registry office and then having the reception in a hall that they've hired.I'm doing the food as a wedding present.
My Friends great at making things so her and her H2B are going to make the invites and my BF,me,BF Mum and BF Auntie are all going to sort all the flowers and the decorations for the hall.

She's buying her wedding dress,my dress and the bridesmaid dresses online.She'll more than likely do the same with shoes,jewellery and veil as well and the suits and shoes for her H2B and his best man.

They're hiring a DJ and in the day there will be about 40 people and in the evening about 100-150.They'll be doing it all for well under £2,000.

YouMakeMyDreams · 08/03/2016 10:35

I've been married twice first one was registry office, parents and siblings party at home cost about £200.

Second time was last year around 70ish guests including about a dozen children. Shopped around and found a local hotel that did gorgeous food and had a bargainous package so we had welcome drinks, canapés, wine on the table, 3 course meal, toast drinks, evening buffet and evening entertainment plus bridal suite for us at night for £2500 all in. There was a couple of little extras like candles and things too. We spent about another £1000 my dress was from bhs and was lovely. Made lots of things ourselves and roped in talented family to make done stuff too. Was also a lovely day and certainly didn't feel like we had a crimped on anything.
It's definitely possible to avoid a £20k price tag wedding and still have an awesome day.

tinyterrors · 08/03/2016 10:35

Friends of ours had a registry office wedding with close family, the room dictated the guest list as it only held 30. Afterwards we (friends and extended family) met then at the local pub for the reception which was a buffet in the afternoon and one later on and a dj. It was fab.

We had a traditional wedding that my parents very kindly paid for the was about 6000 all in. I've got a very big family, I have way over 200 first and second cousins/spouses, plus 20 great aunts and uncles, and 10 aunts and uncles. There's no way we could have invited everyone, lots wouldn't be able to come but going on family weddings I've been to lots would have.

Decide what you both want and tell everyone this is what's happening. Don't let anyone persuade you that second cousin twice removed Margaret has to be invited.

In your position I'd be very tempted to get married just you two, your dcs and parents, then hire a room somewhere for the party.

SooticaTheWitchesCat · 08/03/2016 10:35

We had a very cheap wedding. We got married in Turkey as that's where we were living at the time, it cost about £200 for the paperwork and the registrar. I made my own dress and we bought in all the food and drink and had the reception at the beach restaurant where my husband worked.

I didn't have flowers and friends took photos. No cake.

It was a few hundred pounds total.

We had a really lovely day and celebrated our 12th anniversary a few days ago.

Original poster
DownUnderBound · 08/03/2016 10:38

Lemony I am going to look into the buffet service!

Ok house party with gazebo seems to be the way for us to go! I was thinking of buying a bottle of alcohol and one mixer per week along with my grocery shopping, I have loads of storage to put it, that would mean by the time the big day arrives we are fully sorted for drinks! Was thinking a mixture of Vodka/red wine/white wine...any other drinks that are usually expected at such a party? Thankyou all for.such great advice Smile

OP posts:
ALemonyPea · 08/03/2016 10:39

My wedding cost less than £300 15 years ago. Registry office with 2 witnesses, outfits from the high street, round the pub for a few drinks and something to eat, night out with the family who wanted to come (once we told them we were married).

salsamad · 08/03/2016 10:43

My DS and her husband eloped to Gretna Green in Scotland - they were in their twenties and just wanted a hassle-free, romantic day. They went on their own in his car and stayed over in a local hotel for two nights. My DBiL had a new suit, my DS had a new floaty tea dress - she also had a small hand tied bouquet she took with her. They paid to have some photos taken at the ceremony. The ceremony itself was very intimate with two local people as witness's. We all knew they were going and we were happy for them because they were doing what they wanted. When they came home they had a buffet style party at my parents house with a small group of family and friends.

claireemma86 · 08/03/2016 10:44

We got married for just under 5k. Had 70 people for 3 courses with a wedding package at a holiday inn. Also had 50 additional guests for the evening with a buffet. Best thing we did was that we booked and planned it all in 5 weeks so no time to change anything or save up for something more expensive. We had a local bakery make our cake which was much cheaper than a cake maker as such then our florist created a topper for it. There's loads you can do yourself on a budget.

JasperDamerel · 08/03/2016 10:45

I'm vaguely considering getting married. If I do my plan goes like this:

Fabulous but cheap outfit (evening dress type budget)

Legal ceremony in registry office with one of our parents each as a witness.

Join up with other family members and say our vows in a lovely nearby park. If the weather's nice, have a picnic. If not, go back to our house and eat cake etc indoors.

I'm not sure if I want to keep it family only or not, but if I open it up to friends, invite them to join the picnic or come to a party in the evening at our house to celebrate.

Possibly pay a friend who is a very talented photographer to take pictures.

5madthings · 08/03/2016 10:45

You can do it cheaply, we got married last year.

£70 to register intent of marriage

£150Ish for a weekday morning weddung, we did a thu in may half term.

I spent £250? On a dress but I had it made for me.

I bought the kids new clothes so that cost a bit as we have five but still wasn't a huge cost.

A friend made bouquet and I paid about £200? For a cake.

We then said in the invite that after the wedding we would be goung to pizza express for lunch and peoole could join us if they wanted. I spike with pizza express and confirmed numbers etc and we paid for alcohol for toast etc. I also made activity bags for kids as there were about twenty kids at the wedding.

Umm other bits, some new make up, a second hand hair piece etc but really it can all be done cheaply, cheaper than we did quite easily.

Jenijena · 08/03/2016 10:46

If it's a house party, ask people to bring a bottle or a salad. A hog roast/caterers in to do a bbq and you can feed a lot that way for not much £££.

jellybean2000 · 08/03/2016 10:49

Registry office. Just your witnesses.
Dress you've already got. Bunch a flowers. Cheap rings.
Party in the garden with a few people in the know brining cake, food and drink.

MatildaTheCat · 08/03/2016 10:53

Re drink I think it's fine to have red, white, fizz (Prosecco) and beer. It's cheaper to buy in bulk from somewhere like Majestic and they will deliver, supply glasses, ice, chilling buckets etc. They will take back any left overs. Buying a bottle a week with the shopping will take forever and with wine,nun less you buy the same every week you will end up with a complete mish mash and less easy to top up glasses.

Do you know any tame local teens to serve drinks and clear glasses etc?

PutDownThatLaptop · 08/03/2016 10:53

We got married 9 years ago in the USA. It was with Virgin weddings. The costs of the holiday itself, car hire, hotel, flights, for 5 nights, was £1350 for 2. The wedding package (Justice of the Peace, official paperwork, professional flowers, champagne, professional photographer and two sets of photographs) added £350. We had no guests, no witnesses, no stress whatsoever. The 'reception' cost 50 dollars.

LagunaBubbles · 08/03/2016 10:56

If youre having a house party I would concentrate more on the food rather than the drinks, all partys/weddings Ive been to like this people bring their own alcohol! Maybe a few bottles for the toast (Aldi do a lovely bottle Cava for £4 ish) and some soft drinks.

Aposey · 08/03/2016 10:58

I wouldnt worry too much about providing booze- I went to a lovely wedding where everyone was asked to bring a bottle instead of a gift (though many people brought gifts too!) and the family all brought a dish each for a buffet. The buffet must have taken some organising as there was lots of delicious food, but it was essentially free. They did pay for a hog roast though. It was fab as I dont drink wine so I knew I had brought something I would enjoy!

My wedding was fairly big and expensive as I was getting married in my husbands country where he has a huge family, but we then hosted a party in the UK where we actually live, with all our friends that couldnt make it abroad. We hired a youth hostel and it was beautiful. We did provide food and booze (my DH loves ale and cider so bought a few polypins) but we could have done it for next to nothing.

If you do want to buy beer/cider I would strongly recommend testing a few and buying a polypin or two, much cheaper than bottles!

If youve had trouble before with family or friends butting in and wanting it their way, just dont tell them! Plan and book everything you want and then send them the invites. Tell them all you dont want to talk about it as it would spoil the surprise for them. If they insist or get stroppy tell them it is your wedding, not theirs and this is the way you have dreamed of getting married.