AIBU to be terrified of a Hollywood/Brazilian wax?

[Nicebucket]

So I'm quite hairy down there.

And now after 5 years of no sex, there might be something happening soon.

I'm far too conscious of how hairy I am to just go au natural and shaving and trimming makes me horribly itchy.

So a wax is my only option but I'm TERRIFIED. I've heard such horror stories about how much it hurts, I'm so so scared.

I'm also afraid of getting like bumps or infections in the hair follicles because my hair is quite thick and the skin is quite sensitive.

I go full Hollywood every 4 weeks.
Started at 18 with basic bikini, then a Brazilian for about 10 years and now I just get the lot off
For me, not for anyone else.
Couldn't give a rats arse about how I "should look" or what I'm "supposed to have." My hair, my body, my choice!!
DH doesn't mind how I have my pubes (or lack of)
Same as I don't mind if he trims his or not.

And a definite yes to Lycon waxing. I also keep my G string on and she just moves it about. I know she sees absolutely everything but I have an illusion of privacy!

YANBU, it sounds excruciating.

Wtaf this thread is bringing out my inner angry feminist. Why do we do this to ourselves?

After living in Asia for the past five years and being with only Asian partners, I will never ever ever submit myself to the torture of waxing or shaving ever again. They've all said, "WHY would you get rid of it? It's there naturally. I don't get rid of mine, see! It means that you're a woman and I think it's beautiful!" Made me realize how weird it is that we are now at a point in society where men EXPECT our vulvas to have the same amount of hair as a seven year old. So Imma tidy up for swimsuits and comfort, but that's about it.

OP, do you have a friend you can go with? If so, having that sort of moral support can help. It will hurt like a biatch, but the pain will be gone in about a day. Chances of infection and ingrown hairs, etc, are lower than that from shaving, so you'll be alright. If nothing else, either tell yourself it WON'T hurt so you won't think about it, or maybe get some sort of ingest-able substance to help with the pain, haha!

Christ, adults are supposed to have pubic hair. This is ridiculous!

SO SO SO this ^

And loving thewocket's sensible post too and anyone else who's questioned why in the name of holy hell women feel they need to do this to themselves. Ok ok - your body, your choice - I get that and fair play but the poor OP who doesn't normally do this feeling she has to for a potential date/shag? You. Don't. Have. To.!

It's fine! Weird at first because it's odd to have someone doing it to you, but fine. I find it a lot less painful than lower leg waxing - I suspect because it is a fleshier area, whereas the ankles aren't.

My friend swears by knocking back a single vodka beforehand.

For me personally, it's totally worth it - it feels much cleaner and sexier. If you're prone to ingrowing hairs, there are oils and things you can use as a preventative measure.

Good luck!

OP, this place is fabulous, and was much less painful than the various other salons I used. At my first ever appointment the waxer said "I like a challenge!"

www.ministryofwaxing.com/

I would recommend finding someone who specializes in doing these waxes and uses hot wax.

But.... I don't think being waxed is at all necessary. And it does look pretty extreme. I bought a lady trimmer shaver on Amazon that trims down to a few mm easily and I much prefer it, as does DH- he found the all-bare look a bit odd!

www.amazon.co.uk/Panasonic-ES246AC-Heated-Bikini-Trimmer/dp/B00005JS5C/ref=sr_1_6?s=drugstore&ie=UTF8&qid=1457246484&sr=1-6

Why not try a close trim first and see how you find that?

It hurts.... But it's not as bad as I imagined! And as others have said, it gets better each time you have it done. Just make sure the salon you go to uses hot wax, not warm strip wax!
Luckily, when u had my first Hollywood wax, my best friend was training as a beautician and needed a Guinea pig, so being on my hands and knees, doggy-style, having hair ripped from my bum crack was way less embarrassing in front of my best friend who had seen me naked lots of times before!

Another recommendation for MoW especially if it's your first time.

I've done Brazilian and Hollywood 4 weekly for 8 or 9 years I think and it's 100% for my benefit not for partners'. I would never go back and I don't find it painful at all, but there are alternatives for sure.

Don't do it because you think you have to.

I would just get your bikini line waxed.
I'm lasered but have a Brazilian every 5 weeks. I've got used to it, but it's certainly not painless! I have a great therapist I've had for 15 years who is quick and we chat throughout, which is distracting.
I have it done as I like the look and feel. Certainly not for a man (although he loves it) .

This thread reminds me to go get a wax. Haven't had a proper Brazilian before.

I have proper jungle like bordering on male pubic hair patterns - ie I cannot wear a swimming costume without shaving as the hair extends and is so dark it cannot be disguised as leg hair.

likeaboss fully agree with you!!
I think both men and women should be "neat" down there! I tend to go for a Hollywood wax every 6 weeks or so, and DH just keeps things "groomed".....but one time he got a little "trimmer happy", ruined the whole look he was going for and ended up completely bald I told him his pubic area looked like a shrunken, naked elephant

...but as long as we're making our choices for ourselves then we're enjoying having a choice to make which is one of the privileges of being adults.

I agree with the above, but given that the OP has had no desire to deforest until now, it doesn't seem as if she is entirely doing it for herself...

This has motivated me to go for my first bikini wax! Is that insane? haha I'm going at the end of the month which a week before we go on holiday 😊 I've had three kids (by section!) broken my ankle (have a huge plate and screws in it) and a root canal (lmao) so surely this will be a walk in the park? 😅

I'm so glad I don't give a shit about having pubic hair and just leave it as nature intended. Fuck spending money to go through pain just to fit some ridiculous ideal.

I like the contrast of hair and skin, find it sexy, so I don't do anything to mine and neither does dh - no wax, no shave, no Veet, no 'tidying up'. You are good enough the way you are.

If you really want to do it and it will make you feel great, then you have plenty of advice here. I'd imagine most men would be horrified at the idea that you should do something so painful and so expensive as a preparation for sex.

I'd add another thing to beware of which is if you're on your period it hurts more.

I've had Hollywood, Brazilians etc done by cheap salons in Wimbledon where one therapist was excellent the other not so great, I think both were Thai/Vietnamese.

Never had it done in an expensive salon but yes, yes yes to telling them that you're nervous and it's new to you. Anyone not sensitive to that don't go there again.

It does hurt sometimes but also doesn't too. My hair is on the longer side.

Long hair will make it worse so definitely trim. There are very good waxers and very bad. MoW are good and I'd recommend my amazing waxer (Oxford) to anyone. If you haven't had a recommendation from a friend then maybe you could say roughly where you are and someone on here can help?

I also feel happier a bit neater- mostly for myself but partly because DH does seem to enjoy oral sex more when I am freshly done.

I had my first ever Brazilian aged about 25 in Brazil, where I worked at the time. Took weeks to psyche myself up and the lady was a formidable matron type. It was a revelation- painful but perfectly bearable.

I second tips so far- hot wax not wax and strips (ask the salon) and cut the hair to a bit shorter before you go - I think when you say trimming gives you a rash you are thinking of fairly close with a ladyshave or something? Just tidy it up but scissors not near skin.

I don't recommend " all off" aka Hollywood. To me that is a bit creepy ( tried it once) and for you the waxing will take too long and be too intimate for a first time.

Ask her to start with a basic bikini(sides) to see how you cope with the sensation and then work towards making the landing strip thinner. I'd leave a good 3 cm wide. Be brave to have what they call " underneath" done as the clean smooth feeling is lovely and it actually, for me, hurts less than the top and sides. Paracetamol before you go.

Good luck!

I've had bikini, Brazilians and Hollywood waxing done. It's painful (more so than when I had my tattoo done!) but bearable. I'm currently rocking a full bush though.

As others have said, you'll need to go somewhere that does hot waxing (sometimes hilariously called 'Comfort Waxing'), and you'll need to trim down a bit beforehand (as long hairs lead to a more painful - and longer - experience).

However, if you're comfortable with your hair as it is and prefer to leave it for comfort, leave it! Whatever you do, do it for yourself, not for a man - any bloke who gets put off by pubic hair on a woman is a bit of a weirdo.

I've been getting waxes for years. I bought a a Philips Lumea home IPL so I could laser everything and give up the monthly waxes but my top tip for waxing is DO NOT HAVE STRIP WAX ON YOUR SENSITIVE PARTS

The stuff in the jar they slap on and use the cotton strips to rip off?

Don't let that anywhere near your delicate fanjo skin

Get a hot wax. Anywhere decent will offer a choice between hot wax and strip waxing. Strip for large areas like legs. Always hot wax for your privates.

Strip wax left me itchy, red and hurt like stink

Hot wax - nothing

You will not regret paying the extra few quid.

Hoplesslydevoted (love the name btw) - I also like ministryofwaxing. Most professional and painless wax I've ever had.

I can't be arsed now (boom boom) but I just bought the trimmer. Thanks for the tip.

And now just RTFT and echo the lycon wax tip

I would travel into central London to get to a salon that had Lycon wax. Not even remotely painful. It's like witchcraft

at public areas not being hygienic as standard. You probably have more bacteria on your hands than your fanny. The hair is there to KEEP BACTERIA AWAY FROM YOUR FANJO. Removing it actually increases your risk of getting infections etc.
I have one of those Wilkinson sword razors with the trimmer at the other end, and I keep it sort of trimmed-ish. The guy I sleep with doesn't care, and despite my pubic hair still wants to shag me and, sorry if tmi, give me oral. One of my friends told me she removed all pubic hair since her teens as she knew no man would ever go down on a woman with pubes. She was shocked to hear that that's just not true.
Keep you pubes, remove your pubes, do as you please. Don't make your choice based on thinking a guy wouldnt shag you because you have hair.